


Fireheart

by brina_writes



Category: Throne of Glass Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Drama, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Romance, fireheart - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:07:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 34
Words: 84,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27408556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brina_writes/pseuds/brina_writes
Summary: "She was so used to getting up at twilight and staying up all night, that being in the principal’s office at the early hour of seven thirty in the morning felt almost like torture. And Celaena Sardothien surely knew her fair share about torture."Everybody thought her dead, and for nine years she had been a shadow, a ghost.It was time to come back to life.Celaena Sardothien had a secret agenda when she joined Adarlan Elite High: to get close to those she thought involved in the crimes committed against her family.She never expected to make friends, neither to finally get accepted into the guild.How will she balance a normal high school life with her night time job and clandestine fighting? Will she find out who's to blame for her parent's accident? And with so many lingering around and trying to catch her attention, will she finally open up and let someone in her life?
Relationships: Aelin Ashryver Galathynius | Celaena Sardothien & Rowan Whitethorn, Aelin Ashryver Galathynius | Celaena Sardothien/Rowan Whitethorn, Elide Lochan/Lorcan Salvaterre, Manon Blackbeak/Dorian Havilliard, aedion ashriver/sam cortland
Comments: 174
Kudos: 123





	1. Returning to the Living

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Nemah19 (FleetingPieces)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FleetingPieces/gifts).



> This is a Throne of Glass fanfic that is really losely based on the plot of the saga! I mostly grabbed every single character I loved, and threw them all in High School :D If you haven't finished reading the books, there's basically no spoilers! Most of the ships won't be like the ones from the saga, even if some are (because I loved those couples too much and could have never break them appart).  
> This is still a WIP, a project for NaNoWriMo that I'm consistently working on every day. I will upload bi-weekly for now, every Monday and Thursday :D  
> I hope you love it as much as I do, if you're a fan of this saga, you will find a lot of jokes and scenes re written in completely different settings ;) 
> 
> That's it, I hope you enjoy this :D

She was so used to geting up at twilight and staying up all night, that being in the principal’s office at the early hour of seven thirty in the morning felt almost like torture. And Celaena Sardothien surely knew her fair share about torture.

“Good morning, Miss Sardothien, please come in,” the principal called as he signaled her in from the door of his office.

Begrudgingly, she followed him in as she stifled a yawn. She sat down in front of the old man, arranging her skirt and tucking in the front of the uniform’s white blouse.

“It is a pleasure to have you in our school,” the principal started. “I hope you settle quickly into the spirits of Adarlan Elite High, and to make sure of it, I have arranged for the president of the student council to give you a tour of the grounds. He was kind enough to come in early for this.” His voice was monotonous, like he was bored of speaking with teens all day, but he sounded stern at the same time, as if 'settling into the spirit' actually meant 'sticking to the rules'.

He had no idea that wasn’t going to be the case, Celaena had already broken more rules than most students, and she had yet to start her first day.

She heard the steps in the hallway before the door opened, and she turned around with her best smile at the same time as principal Allsbrook spoke again.

“Chaol Westfall, this is our new exchange student, Celaena Sardothien. Miss. Sardothien, this is Mr. Westfall, the president of the student council.”

If it wasn’t for all her training, her jaw would have fallen open; she knew him. The guy standing by the door wore his uniform immaculate and perfectly ironed, there was even that straight little line at the front of his dress pants. His white shirt was tidy and tucked in, his tie pulled almost all the way up; his chestnut hair was cut short on the sides and a little longer in the middle, combed back with gel; and his copper-brown eyes were piercing into her, his eyebrows slightly lowered.

She was pretty sure he had recognised her.

“Morning, Celaena,” he said, smiling politely.

“Good morning to you, Chaol, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” she said in an effort to be polite back, if only to keep the charade of a good girl in front of the old man sitting at the desk. 

She hoped for the slight chance that he wouldn't remember meeting her a few weeks back, or that he didn’t recognise her with the small change of appearance. 

“Okay, off you go into the tour, I have plenty of things to do, and another student to greet soon,” the principal dismissed them with a wave of his hand.

Celaena followed Chaol out of the office, hoping that he wouldn’t mention the day they ran into each other in the secretary’s office. She hadn’t thought there would be any students in the school's grounds during holidays; but of course the nerd of the class had been there and had almost found her hacking into the school’s database. She had been fast, getting off the computer, jumping over the counter and seating in the waiting area just before Chaol had walked in the door. 

She had claimed to be waiting for the secretary, that there were some papers she had to hand in; and she hoped that’d been enough to fool him.

“So, why does a senior student transfer schools?” Chaol asked her after showing her around for a while. “Wouldn’t you want to graduate with all your friends?” 

“I transferred because I had to move here, and the reason I moved is none of your concern,” she quipped, not being able to repress the little hiss sound escaping her lips. There was something about the guy, he was already pissing her off.  
“Interesting,” he muttered under his breath. “Well, welcome to Rifthold then,” he said as he led her towards a new hallway. “So, this is the cafeteria,” he pointed to a set of double doors at the end of the hall. “And the gimnasium is in the next building over, out that side door,” he added, gesturing to their right.

They walked around for a few more minutes while she pretended not to know the place like she knew the palm of her hand. She had meticulously studied the blueprint of the building, and had snuck in during the night a few times to get familiar with her new surroundings.

“That’s about it, you can ask around if you get lost,” he finished, looking at his wrist watch. “We should go now, or else we’ll be late for the first period, missing homeroom is enough. Let me see,” he added pointing at the schedule in Celeana’s hand.  
She passed it over to him and Chaol looked at it quickly and smiled, but there was still an odd look in his eyes. She could tell he didn’t fully trust her; she’d had to work on that.

“We’re together for the first two periods, so follow me,” he said.

“Sure thing,” she replied, flashing him with one of her best grins.

They walked into the classroom, and Celaena was already calculating her odds. Would this be the type of school where they had you introduce yourself? She half hoped not, but a part of her hoped it was; it would be good to read people’s expressions from the front of the room. And she couldn't deny she'd enjoy the attention. 

She was only half disappointed when the teacher barely looked at her and nodded. “Oh, yes, one of the new students,” the guy said. He must have been in his late thirties, and looked a bit bored, but Celaena couldn’t help but notice how he glanced at her up and down quickly. “Just grab a seat wherever you want,” he brushed her off.

She analyzed the room and decided to sit around the middle, but to one side, so she’d had the security of the wall to her left, and the gossiping girls sitting to her right. She could already hear their whispers and see their eyes turning her way, heads close together as they talked. 

“Oh my God,” one of the girls was saying, “I think she’s got potential for prom queen.” Her voice was a little too loud to be considered a whisper.

“Shush, she can probably hear you! But you’re right, she’ll be good competition for Lysandra. Do you reckon she’ll join the bees? Looks like the type,” the second one replied.

Lysandra, she saved that name into her brain. Probably the queen of this school; pretty girls normally meant trouble, so she’d better keep her eyes and ears on that one.

“Have you seen the new junior already?” The first one asked after a few more hushed whispers. Celaena leaned on an elbow closer to them, pretending to look at the front while she eavesdropped.

“I haven’t, but I’ve heard he’s to die for!” 

“He’s really tall and handsome." Celaena rolled her eyes at that. "I hope I have some classes with him…. Do you know what his name is?”

“I think it’s Samuel.”

“Okay, attention class,” the teacher interrupted.

Celeana was glad for the interruption, she had had enough of the girls' gossip for the moment being, and she hoped her school year wasn’t going to be all like that. That is, if she even got to the end of the year. Gossip was a good source of information, but it was also unreliable, and annoying. 

The first few classes went by fairly quickly, she sat to one side of the classrooms, interacted with a few students, and mostly listened to what everybody had to say about her and the other new student. Not many dared approach her, she must have looked as grumpy as she felt due to the lack of sleep. A few had said hello and introduced themselves, and she had filed every face and every name she could into her memory.

It was after her third class, while she was leaving some books in her locker, that she finally ran into him. Or most likely, that he found her.

“Hello, gorgeous,” he said in a mocking tone, standing behind her.

She turned around and glanced at the hallway, making sure that there were not many people around and that no one could hear them. 

“I still don’t know why you’re here, but just stay out of my fucking way, Cortland! Don’t ruin my plan,” she yelled under her breath, looking around to the few people still lingering in the hall.

“You know perfectly well why I’m here, and I can't get in the way if I don't even know what your plan is," he hissed, and then he popped a hand against the locker, boxing her in.

Celaena wasn’t unaccustomed to him being so close, but his simple presence could still piss her off.

“Yes, I do know why you're here,” she replied with a huff. “It's because Arobynn doesn’t fully trust me after the... incident,” she finished, trying not to think about that night. "But I don't know why he'd trust you," she added, narrowing her eyes and almost spitting the last word out. 

She pushed his left hand off the locker in one quick motion, almost making him stumble. He had probably been expecting the move, as he shifted the weight to his right foot and popped his right hand on the other side of her head instead.

Sam Cortland looked at her with his brows tucked together, his face merely inches away from hers. It looked like he was going to keep arguing, he opened and closed his mouth. He looked hurt for a second, and angry, but then he turned around, looking ahead into the now empty hallway. The first bell had rung already.

“I’ll be around if you change your mind,” he replied over his shoulder before walking away.

“Asshole,” Celaena breathed as she closed her locker and walked quickly to her next class. She didn’t need the kind of attention that being late to class would give her, especially not for the class she was heading to... Especially not when she was about to see Aedion for the first time after nine long years.

She made it in time, and entered the room just before the teacher called the attention of the students. Celaena was glad for it, as she saw Aedion eyeing her when she walked in. She had to concentrate not to directly look at him as she made her way to the back of the class, where he would have to turn around if he wanted to look at her again. 

Once she was in her seat, she let her long golden hair fall as a curtain to the side of her face, covering her from Aedion’s turquoise eyes. He was sitting only two rows in front of her to the right, and she had a perfect view of his profile. 

“Welcome class, I hope you’re enjoying your first day so far. I’m Ms. Doranelle and I will be your math teacher for this term,” the short woman at the front said. She proceeded to write her name on the board and asked them to open their textbooks on page 15.

As soon as the lesson started, Celaena tucked her hair behind her ear, and looked at Aedion more closely. She had to admit, he had grown into a fine young man. He had broad shoulders that filled in the school’s jacket nicely, and his blond hair was only a shade lighter than hers. Celeana could tell he spent a lot of time in the sun, as his skin had a slight shine to it, same as his hair. She looked at her own hands, her ghost pale skin so opposite to his, and wondered if her skin would acquire that golden tan too if she started spending more time outdoors during the daytime. 

She’d probably find out soon.

“Celaena, what’s the answer to question five on the textbook?” Ms. Doranelle asked, probably catching her daydreaming.

She let her hair fall back onto her face, and read the question quickly.

“Twenty five,” she replied immediately, trying not to sound too cocky. 

A bit surprised, the teacher raised her thick eyebrows at her, but then nodded.

“Yes, that’s right… Just, don’t get distracted,” she added before continuing with the lesson.

As she looked to the right, Celaena caught his eyes. Aedion Ashryver’s turquoise eyes were just as she remembered them; but she didn’t really need to remember, because they were equal to the ones she saw in the mirror every morning. The golden ring around his pupils was visible even from a few seats away, and Celaena was glad she had chosen to wear brown contacts, sinceto anybody paying only a little attention, it would have been so obvious that their eyes looked alike.

Aedoin squinted his eyes, as if trying to figure out if he knew her from somewhere. Looking away would be suspicious, so she held his gaze, little snippets of memories coming back to her.

She remembered the two of them running around her parents yard back in Terrasen, playing tag; kicking each other under the table during the ostentatious business banquets, and being told off for it. She recalled Aedion curling up on her bed during a sleep over because she had had a nightmare; and him fighting with some bullies in primary school after they had pulled on her braids. 

And her last memory, that of Aedion hugging her goodbye before moving away from Terrasen when his father had been transferred to run the company in Rifthold. That had been barely a few weeks before the accident, before her whole life had come crashing down. She had been so excited for the visit, thinking she’d finally be reunited with him.

But it was all so different now, and none of that mattered. Neither of them were the kids they used to be, they were strangers now. And as Aedion Ashryver looked away, Celaena Sardothien kept her eyes on the back of his head, thinking how she would find out the truth, and take her revenge. She was sure he wouldn’t be an obstacle, he was merely a suspect.


	2. Infiltrating the 24th floor

The front door banged behind Celaena as she kicked it close with her heel. She dropped her bag to the floor, and walked towards the stairs as she took off the school’s jacket.  
“Don’t leave your shit lying around,” Sam yelled behind her, and Celaena turned around just in time to catch her bag midair and spin in a full circle not to lose her balance as she hung the bag back over her shoulder.

“I leave my shit wherever I want, Cortland,” she quipped.

“Someone’s in a mood already?” Sam asked, walking towards Celaena and stopping only an inch from her.

“I am not in a mood, but you keep getting in the middle and fucking things up. I don’t need your damned help!” She yelled, pushing Sam with a finger against his muscly chest.  
“Celaena, Sam, that is enough,” a voice called from the top of the stairs. Sam squared his back, his jaw tightening up just a fraction, and Celaena turned around quickly, letting her pleated grey skirt fan around her.

“Arobynn,” she said with as much honey as she could add to her voice. “I didn’t expect you to be home,” she added, smiling broadly, as if him being home could make her happy.

“How could I not? It’s your first day of school after all, how did it feel like? It must be exhilarating to be surrounded by so many people of your age after such a long time,” he said, making his words sound like a caress, but Celaena could still feel the venom behind them.

Arobynn Hamel, their legal guardian and carer, wasn’t one to care. No, he only cared about the things that would benefit him, and this plan was not one that he had been keen on to start with. Celaena had managed to convince him, to persuade him with sweet words and perfectly planned strategies. She knew infiltrating Adarlan Elite High would lead to her finding the truth about what had happened with her parents, and convincing Arobynn had been her top priority for months.

Returning to the world of the living after nine years of living like a ghost was going to be a challenge for her, she knew that, but she was ready for it. Not that she wasn’t used to dealing with people, or to playing parts; but the crowds from her night life weren’t like the rich kids from Adarlan. She knew rich though, she knew them from the inside, from sneaking into their houses and stealing their secrets for Arobynn, she knew them from examining and stealing their most precious possessions; from plotting against them countless times.

“It was a good day,” Celaena replied, making sure not to give much away. “I still don’t understand why you sent Cortland though,” she added, not being able to avoid complaining about it. She glanced back at Sam with her eyes narrowed. 

She was almost hoping Arobynn would admit to not trusting her after what had happened the last time she went rogue.

“I think he can be a helpful asset,” Arobynn simply said, and then he walked down the stairs, brushing Celaena’s arm in a calculated caress as he walked past her. “I trust you can find out the truth,” he said, placing a finger under her chin. “But I also think you shouldn’t get too much attention to yourself, and having another new kid in school may be good for that,” he finished as he turned around, and kept walking towards the lounge.

There was no way Celaena could avoid getting attention, she wasn’t just another girl in the bunch and eyes always darted to her whenever she was in a room. Her long golden hair was the first thing people noticed, followed by the curves in her body; and her muscles. Most assumed she spent her nights in the gym, running and lifting weights, or that she was a cheerleader. They weren’t too far off, but there was so much more to her training schedule. Celaena and Sam could sometimes spend up to six hours in the basement’s gym. 

But her looks weren’t the only reason people looked at her, there was a fire in her eyes and a vibe that constantly surrounded her, and it attracted people. She had been told countless times that she could light up a room only by walking in; but she thought that was superficial bullshit coming out of people’s mouths.

“I better hurry,” she said to no one in particular as she started walking up the stairs. “I need to go check into the hotel.”

“Make sure you come over and report daily,” Arobynn said from around the corner, his voice sounding farther and farther away as she kept climbing up.

“I sure will,” she yelled before running the last few steps up the stairs and heading to her room. 

She closed the door behind her, grabbed her already packed bags and left them next to the door as she looked for a change of clothes. She had so many clothes that she had enough to pack a bag for a couple of weeks, and still leave plenty behind. Arobynn was good like that, and he often gifted her dresses, tights and skirts, as well as jewellery. She didn’t think anybody in town owned as much jewelry as she did. 

When she was younger, she used to think it was Arobynn’s way of showing that he cared, but she knew better; he didn’t care at all. He just wanted to show his power, show her how much he could do for her to keep her in his net, and keep her always owing him something.

Those days were about to be over, she was 17 now, only a year away from being able to claim her place back. All she had to do was figure out who was an ally, and who was a foe. Who was responsible for the plane crash that had killed her parents? The authorities had deemed it an accident in the end, but she knew better. She knew it had been planned, she had been young, but she could still remember her mother’s worried eyes as the plane started going down.

“We were set up,” she had said to her father as they hugged. 

Her younger self hadn’t been able to figure out the meaning of those words, but years under Arobynn’s tutelage had.

Gavriel, Aedion’s father, was her first suspect. He had been the one they were heading over to visit, and he was the one that knew the most about their schedule and plans to arrive in Rifthold that day. But he wasn’t the only one, they were many after her family’s fortune, and she would get to the bottom of it. 

She finished getting changed into her favourite black leather tights, a long sleeved red top with a considerable cleavage, her red high heels and a black leather jacket; it was time for a ride.

It only took her a few minutes to make her way to the Havilliard Hotel, and as soon as she was past the front door, there was already someone picking her bags for her and helping her over to the main counter.

“Celaena Sardothian,” she said as she leaned over the front desk, taking her sunglasses off. “I have a room booked for the next two months,” she stated.

“Perfect, I just need you to sign this paper here,” the receptionist said as she placed a form on the counter. “And here is your key. Breakfast is served between six and ten in the morning, lunch starts at midday, until two in the afternoon, and dinner is served from five until nine. If you have any questions, you can call reception, and we also provide room service.” She finished with a polite smile.

“Thank you,” she replied as she finished signing the form and grabbed the keys. 

She was excited for the freedom, it was the first time she’d be living on her own, even if it was fake; even if she still had to go to Arobynn’s mansion everyday to tell him what was going on. She'd also have to check with him regularly in case there were any more jobs he needed her to do; she was sure there would be plenty going on. 

She was glad for the facade that allowed her this freedom, claiming to be an exchange student had been the perfect excuse to get inside the Hotel. She knew everybody would buy straight into it, rich people never questioned anything that shined; and she had her glistering jewelry to prove she belonged.

She called the elevator in the lobby, and leaned on one foot as she waited, her hands on her hips.

“Are you going up?” a voice called behind her.

“Yup, not much point going down, is there?” she replied as she looked behind her shoulder.

The guy standing there was about her same height, with raven black hair and a stunning pair of sapphire blue eyes that were looking her up and down.

“Just the parking lot, actually,” he replied. “Would you mind if I joined you? Which floor are you heading to?” He asked.

“So many questions for someone who I don’t even know by name,” she replied, turning around and being fully aware of who was the guy now standing in front of her.

“Sorry, my bad,” he said as he extended a hand towards her. “I’m Dorian Havilliard Junior, son of the Dorian Havilliard.” She looked down at his outstretched arm and then back up to his eyes before shaking his hand. 

“Nice to meet you,” she said as she purposely licked her bottom lip, aware of the attention drawing red lipstick she was wearing.

The door opened up behind them, and they both stepped into the elevator. She leaned against the back wall, her arms crossed over her chest and her right foot popped against the wall. Dorian selected the 25th floor, and then looked at her.

“May I know the floor now?”

“24th,” she replied with a smirk.

His eyebrows rose up, and he gave her an incredulous smirk before punching in the number.

“Should I know you?” Dorian asked her after a moment’s pause. He was clearly wondering what kind of teeneger was staying in one of the suits from the second to last floor. After all, they were the most expensive rooms of the hotel. 

“Maybe,” she said, lifting her chin up.

“You haven’t told me your name yet,” he said then, turning around to fully face her.

The number on the reader marked that they were onto the 6th floor.

“Have I not?” she asked innocently.

7th floor.

“No, you haven’t,” he said, and he took a step forward.

8th floor.

Celaena chewed on her bottom lip, as if thinking the question over.

9th floor.

She rearranged her hair, sweeping it back and then putting a few strands back to the front, careful to look down as she did, crossing her arm back under her chest.

10th floor.

She glanced up, and caught Dorian looking down at her cleavage.

11th floor.

“My eyes are up here,” she said, pointing up with one hand.

12th floor.

He looked flustered for a second, but he got rid of the look fast enough, replacing it for a smug smile instead.

13th floor.

“Excuse me, I got a little distracted,” he said, and then he cleared his throat.

14th floor.

“That’s fine, just remember where my eyes are.” 

15th floor.

“Of course, I could never forget such beautiful eyes,” he said cockily.

16th floor.

“They’re like a cup of coffee, dark, intense, but with just the smaller dab of milk.” He said as he took another step towards her.

17th floor.

“Do you always flirt by comparing girls to foods you like?” Celaena asked, sounding incredulous and offended.

19th floor.

“Who said I’m flirting?” Dorian took another small step towards her.

20th floor.

“Oh, I think you were, you even forgot you had asked about my name. It is rude to flirt with someone whose name you don’t even now,” she added, brushing her hair back over her shoulder. 

21th floor.

“Are you going to tell me your name then? I might see you around here often if you’re staying for a while. You know, this is my father’s hotel after all.”

22th floor.

“Oh, how lucky I’d be if I run into you again, right?” She said as she shrugged with one shoulder. She peeled off the wall and took a step towards him, standing only an inch away.

23th floor.

“You would be,” he replied, his breath brushing her cheeks.

24th floor.

“It’s Celaena,” she whispered in his ear as she leaned forward, and then walked past him, her shoulder bumping into his as she moved towards the door. “And you might be lucky to see me again,” she added as she stepped out and turned around to watch the doors close between them.

You will certainly see me again, she thought. You will see a lot of me.


	3. A hell of an entrance

Sam Cortland was early to school on the second day of classes, as he wanted to get a feel of what people were thinking, what the mood was and what people’s patterns were. He knew Celaena had been around the premises multiple times before the term had started, but he hadn’t expected to be joining her until only a few days ago. Arobynn had approached him a week before and threatened him in a way that made him comply with being his spy. He hated it, but he didn’t really have any other viable options.

He was sitting on a bench by the entrance waiting for the bell to ring and watching people come and go. A few of the girls had approached him and said hello, some had even asked which classes he was attending and tried to flirt a bit. Reality was that he wasn’t interested in any of them, and he didn’t have time for romance anyway, he was technically at work. He had been polite and nice to each of them regardless, because he had an image he wanted to portrait. He wanted to be the good guy that everybody could count on, the one they’d trust with their secrets.

The loud rumble of an engine and the sound of squealing tires took him out of his daydream, and he looked up, his brows shooting up in surprise.

“So much for being one more in the crowd,” Sam muttered under his breath.

Right in front of the entrance’s stairs he saw a black motorcycle that had just parked up. The bike’s sinuous and seductive lines were perfectly in harmony with the curves of the girl that was getting off it. It was a sight he was used to, at least under different circumstances. The whole crowd had turned their heads around, and everybody was already whispering, watching the girl jumping off the bike. 

Sam had to give her credit, Celaena did look fantastic as she jumped down, lifting her flexible and long leg high up and giving the whole school a pretty decent view of her inner thighs. She stood next to the bike for a second, probably making sure that there were enough eyes on her before she took the black helmet off, shaking her blond hair around and then brushing it back with a hand. 

“Wow, who’s that?” A girl whispered next to him. 

“What a slut,” another one murmured under her breath, Sam barely heard her as she walked past him.

“You gotta be shitting me,” he heard Dorian Havilliard say as he elbowed the guy next to him, which Sam was pretty sure was the president of the student's council.

“What is it?” The brunette guy asked.

“That girl, she’s staying at my family's hotel,” he replied.

“Celaena, the new exchange student?” The president asked, furrowing his brows.

“Yes, I ran into her in the lobby yesterday, I can’t believe I didn’t notice her at school!” Dorian said, and then the pair started slowly walking towards Celaena, as if wanting to watch her from closer.

Sam hid his smile behind a hand, pretending that he was coughing. He wasn’t surprised at all that Celaena had managed to run into him on her first night at the hotel; she was amazing at what she did. Cunning came to her almost as second nature.

Almost, because it hadn’t always been like that and Sam could still remember the broken girl that had shown up lying limp on Arobynn’s arms all those years ago.

“Who’s that?” Sam had asked, standing on his tiptoes to look at the girl’s face.

Her coat had been dripping water over in the foyer as Arobynn walked towards the staircase.

“Her?” He had asked disparagingly, “She’s my lottery ticket,” he had said as he quickly walked up the stairs.

Sam could still remember the hushed whispers around the mansion on those first days, the planning and plotting. Arobynn had wanted to get a ransom for the girl, but had finally concluded that it was most likely that she was wanted dead, so it would be a safer bet to use the girl until things were certain; until he came up with a better plan.

Weeks had led into months, and months into years, and the girl had stayed. Arobynn had trained her, and she had slowly come out of her shell, proving to be strong, ferocious and sassy. Damn, she could be so sassy, Sam thought. Him and Celaena had clashed so much during the years, and had gone from being strangers, to almost friends, to enemies, and all the way to lovers for the one quick peck that had been both of theirs first kiss. 

Sam chuckled at the memory, Celaena had been so annoying that day. They were probably around 12 years old, and Sam had wanted for her to shut up so badly, that he had kissed her once, pressing his lips hard against hers. 

He had ended up with a black eye for it.

“What happened with being inconspicuous?” he asked his female counterpart as she walked past him. He joined her pace, quickly walking by her side.

“That was never my plan,” she hissed under her breath. “Now piss off, I don’t want anybody to see us talking,” she said as she sped up and walked through the front doors, letting them slam closed behind her back.

“Noted,” he murmured, slowing down and taking a peaceful pace while nodding happily at all the girls that grinned at him. 

He made his way to his locker and grabbed a few books, slowly stacking them in his arms as he tried to catch anything from the few conversations around him. It looked like the whole school was talking about Celaena’s entrance. The girls were a bit upset about the new competition, and every single guy sounded like he wanted to get under her skirt.

He shook his head, and made his way to homeroom. 

The day went by without any more major events. He went from class to class, only running into Celaena in one of them. The talk about her dramatic entrance had subdued by then, but he could still hear whispers about it here and there, most of the guys were focusing on her ride now, instead of dribbling over the image of her. 

There was one reaction that he was eager to hear about, and it was the one from the only student he thought he hadn't run into that day. He had tried to join as many advanced classes as he could, but he wasn’t as literate and smart as Celaena was, hence why he had had to join the school as a junior and only had a few advanced lessons. 

He found the guy he was looking for during the lunch hour, and he made sure to sit at a table close enough to eavesdrop. Aedion was sitting with all the jocks, as it was to expect. It must have been practice day, because instead of wearing his classic uniform, he was wearing a black polo, the number 15 written on big yellow letters on his back. He hadn’t even taken off his captain band, which gripped his bicep tightly as his arm flexed when he rested his head on a fist.

Aedion was talking with a few other players, a huge grin on his face showing all his perfectly white teeth. Sam watched as his eyes shot up when someone called his name, and a tall curvy girl with dark brown hair cascading up to her waist walked over to him. She wrapped her arms around the captain’s neck, gave him a quick peck on the lips and then sat on his lap. Sam wasn’t surprised to see that she was wearing the cheerleader’s outfit. There was an elegant look in the way her bare pale legs were crossed at the ankles in a careful manner.

He was close enough to hear most of their conversation, so he leaned closer not to miss any words.

“Hi honey, how was cheerleading practice?” Aedion asked as he played with a strand of the girl’s hair.

“Not bad, the squad was a bit distracted though,” she said, sounding mildly annoyed.

“Why was that?” Aedion asked, his bright turquoise eyes looking up at her, seeming genuinely confused.

“That new girl, she has them all a bit crazy. Apparently she made a big entrance this morning, but I missed it because I was talking with the coach, did you catch her?” the girl asked, sounding curious to see her boyfriend’s reaction.

“Oh, I was a bit far, but I did see her. Her ride is actually a piece of art,” he said.

Sam had to cover his mouth to hide his chuckle for the second time that day. The guy was good, he knew how to deflect the conversation not to make his girlfriend jealous. Sam was genuinely impressed.

“Lysandra!” A blond girl called as she rushed over to Aedion’s girlfriend.

“What’s the matter?” She asked, turning around and letting Sam get a full view of her big and beautiful emerald green eyes. 

“Sorry hun, coach needs a word with you, would you mind going back to the gymnasium?” The two girls left in a hurry and Sam’s eyes trailing after them.

“She’s so taken, mate,” a skinny guy sitting next to Sam said as he elbowed him playfully. “I recommend you to be careful, Aedion won’t like it if he catches you staring,” he said in a low voice, as if to make sure that the next table over wouldn’t hear them.

Sam thanked him for the advice, and kept on eating his lunch. He spotted Celaena on the opposite side of the cafeteria then, and followed her gaze to see what she was looking at so intently. Her eyes were fixed on a table not far away from him, and Sam noticed Dorian Havillard sitting there with the same brunette guy from before. So far, those two seemed to go together everywhere. They were talking and elbowing each other, their eyes on the blond girl that was eyeing them shamelessly.

It looked to him like Celaena wasn’t wasting any time; she was hunting, and only for a second, he felt sorry for her prey.


	4. Implementing phase one

Once lunchtime came around, Celaena walked eagerly towards the school’s cafeteria, her stomach rumbling loudly. She was still not used to the new schedule and having to get up so early, she hadn’t managed to grab anything for breakfast before riding to school. She had had enough time to carefully sort out her uniform for the day though, adding her own little twist with a red bandana tied around her right wrist. She had also taken twenty minutes in front of the mirror putting on her contacts and making sure her makeup was spotless.

She had accentuated her cheekbones, making her face look a bit rounder than what it was, had thinned her nose, and added a few fake freckles across her nose. She had decided on black eyeliner and simple grey eyeshadow, with a little bit of gold in the inner corners of her eyes. That day's lipstick choice was bright red, as it matched her rider's vibe.

Celaena got in the queue at the buffet, eyeing everything in front of her and having a hard time choosing only one item from the vast range of options. In the end, she settled for the fried chicken, a portion of fries, and two servings of pudding.

Finding an empty table close enough to her main interests but a little secluded at the same time was a challenge; but once she found the spot, she sat down with her tray.

She watched as the cafeteria filled up, and spotted Sam on a crowded table only a few meters away. They were one to each side of Aedion’s table, and she knew this was no coincidence; Sam was playing his cards too. Annoyed, Celaena glared at him, but Sam’s eyes were too focused on the couple making a scene in between them, and he didn’t see her.

“Hi, there!” Someone said, popping a tray of food next to her own, and grabbing a seat.

Celaena turned towards the intruder, surprised to find a dark-skinned girl with long raven dreadlocks falling down to her waist and curious eyes that were looking at her.

“Hi,” She said dubiously.

She had enjoyed the peace and quiet of eating on her own the previous day, but she knew it wasn’t going to last. Celaena would have to find her place in the status quo soon, or else she’d end up as an outcast, and that wouldn’t be good for her plans.

“Nice to meet you,” the girl sitting next to her said. “I’m Nehemia, I’m the only other exchange student in this stuck-up school, so I thought we might as well kick start this inevitable friendship of ours,” she finished with a tight smile.

Celaena looked at her a little perplexed, and a little stunned. Nehemia looked somehow shy yet she also had a kind of hidden sass that Celaena found appealing. But she had to remind herself that she wasn’t there to make friends, she had no time for it.

“If you say so,” she replied, nonchalant.

“I’ve been here for a whole year, and I can tell you, this is a hard crowd to please.” Nehemia looked her up and down as if analyzing her. “I would have expected you to be sitting on the table with the jocks already,” she added pointing at them with her head. “A few of them are taken, as the team captain over there. His name is Aedion,” she explained, talking eagerly as Celaena listened carefully while pretending to be more interested in her food. “His father owns one of the biggest businesses in town, and they have investments all over the place, he is loaded! Even more than most of us. It's a bit of a sad story if you ask me, his mother died when he was young, and it’s just him and his father; I believe he lost his aunt and other family members to a tragic accident too. You wouldn’t be able to tell from looking at him though, he’s always so full of himself… And he's got that damned gorgeous smile!”

Nahemia sighed and stopped talking for a moment as she ate a few spoonfuls of her lunch. Next to her, Celaena looked at Aedion through her lashes as she picked on the fries.

“Who’s the chick with him?” She asked, knowing that any other girl would have asked the same question.

“Lysandra? She’s the queen bee. Captain of the cheerleaders, she’s probably the most gorgeous girl in this whole town,” she said, and then looked at Celaena, analyzing her again. “Well, maybe she was, she might have competition now.”

Celaena huffed, trying not to grin at the remark. Of course, she was better looking than that girl. At least now she knew who that Lysandra girl was, and she could keep an eye on her.

“Don’t be stupid,” she said instead.

“Please, I’m not blind, you are absolutely gorgeous. And blond seems to be trending at the moment, I’ve heard every single boy in school talk about your entrance today,” Nehemia added as she lifted her thin brows.

Celaena smiled to herself and disregarded the comment with a wave of her hand.

“So, how long have those two been together for?” She asked next, knowing that she might as well just use this free source of information while it lasted; there wasn’t much time left on the clock before they’ll have to head over to their next class.

“A long while, they've been together since the start of junior year,” Nehemia said. “So sorry to be the one to break it up to you, but you have no chances with Aedion, many have tried to break them apart, but no one has succeeded,” Nehemia finished.

Celaena smiled while she laughed to herself once more. “Don’t worry, I’m not interested, he’s not really my type,” she replied.

“I guess you’re right, you two would look a bit creepy as a couple anyway, he looks like he could be your brother,” Nehemia stated, playing with a gold band from one of her dreads.

Celaena composed her expression into something neutral, trying not to worry about that remark. No one would ever suspect they were related, she was safe, she reminded herself. But this girl had her eyes on the details, and Celaena knew straight away that she’d have to be careful around her. Maybe having her close would be the smarter option.

“What’s your type then? I can picture a hot dark-haired boy…” Nehemia said dreamily as she played with another one of her dreads, her dark eyes darting around the crowd and looking for someone to match Celaena with.

“Oh, how come I didn’t notice it before?” Nehemia said in a hushed tone as she leaned closer to talk into Celaena’s ear. “Dorian is checking you out,” she said, a smile spreading wide on her lips. “You two would look so good together, but he’s not the dating type,” Nehemia replied.

That was a cue Celaena didn’t know she was waiting for, and as the words left Nehemia’s lips, she found herself popping another fry in her mouth and looking up. She met Dorian’s bright blue eyes, and she held his gaze, chewing slowly, playing with a strand of hair between her fingers.

“How come?” She asked Nehemia, her eyes still on Dorian’s.

Dorian took the bait and elbowed the guy sitting next to him. Celaena watched as Chaol lifted his head up, and watched her shamelessly staring at them.

“I mean, he’s never had a girlfriend in school, rumor has it he’s been with half the girls from Adarlan Elite though,” Nehemia said. “Almost every girl claims to have been in bed with him, but the stories don’t quite… match,” she finished.

Dorian murmured something in Chaol’s ear and then contained a laugh as Chaol shook his head from one side to the other. Dorian shrugged, and stood up, leaving his tray behind on the table and sliding his backpack over a shoulder.

“Is that right?” Celaena replied, her eyes unblinking.

Dorian walked towards their table slowly, deliberately, his eyes never leaving hers.

“Oh my God,” Nehemia whispered. “He’s coming over here, what should we do? What should I do? Do you want me to go?” She was moving in her seat, and Celaena put a hand over her tight under the table, as if telling her to stay calm. Nehemia got the wordless message and went still all of a sudden. She kept her head down, but she gazed up between her long lashes.

Nehemia looked shy all of a sudden, her shoulders slightly drawn as if trying to make her tall frame look small, but Celaena thought it was a facade; she reckoned underneath it all the girl seemed composed, careful, attentive. The girl knew how to lie, and how to make people see her the way she desired. Celaena noticed because she was so used to doing the exact same thing.

“Dorian,” Celaena said sweetly as the guy finally made his way to them and stood over the other side of the table. “What brings you here?” She asked, motioning at the table and the empty seats in front of her.

“Wondering if I could join you for a moment?” He asked.

“Well,” Celaena said slowly. “I’m pretty certain the bell is about to ring any minute now, and there’s a class I need to attend. I’m sure there’s one you need to head to as well.”

She finished eating the last of her fries, and grabbed a spoon, taking a bite of her chocolate pudding and licking her lips slowly as she swallowed.

“There’s still a few minutes on the clock,” Dorian quipped. “And I’m sure you can’t finish all that on your own,” he continued. “Maybe I could help you.”

“Would you like to bet on that?” Celaena said with a smirk and then shoved another big spoonful in her mouth.  
She could see Dorian staring at her lips, and she ran her tongue between her lips again.

“You’d be surprised at my odds in gambling,” Dorian said, composing his expression into something like a smug smile. “I’ve never lost, not once,” he said.

Celaena let her eyes drift past Dorian quickly, and saw that she had the attention of most of the cafeteria by then. She saw Aedion looking at her and then looking away when she met his eyes, and then she collided into Sam’s golden-brown irises. It was as if he was trying to burn a hole into Dorian’s back, trying to see through his very soul.

“And will you?” Celaena asked. “I mean, bet against me?” she said as she finished the first portion of pudding, and moved onto the second one.

“No, I would never,” he replied. “I would never dare bet against you, Celaena, I will be sure to always bet on you,” he said, and then he sat down in front of her, leaning over the table to look at her closely.

“Uhm, interesting,” she said. With that, she pushed the dessert over to Dorian and stood up quickly, grabbing her bag in one hand and hooking the other around Nehemia’s elbow. “Lost my appetite, you can have it,” she said as she pulled on Nehemia’s arm and turned around to walk away.

“You can’t run away, I know where you live, Celaena,” Dorian’s mellow voice trailed after them as they headed out of the cafeteria without looking back.

“What was that about? You just stood up the king of the school! In front of everybody! Do you have any idea how popular that guy is?” Nehemia asked as the double doors closed behind them.

“You have to keep them on their toes,” Celaena replied as she abruptly let go of Nehemia’s arm. The dark-skinned girl looked shocked and motioned to follow along, but Celaena lifted a hand up. “I’m on my own from here on, but thanks for the company,” she said nonchalantly as she walked away with quick steps.

She had never had a girlfriend in her life, and this was the wrong time to go looking for one. Nehemia was smart, and she would keep an eye on her, but she didn’t need friends, no; she needed to infiltrate the hive.

The first step of her plan had already proved to be a success. She had got the whole school thinking she was a possible match for Dorian. And most importantly, she had caught the attention of the jocks' table.

Time to move to the second stage, time to become one of the popular kids.


	5. Kickstarting phase two

It only took Celaena a couple of days to figure out the patterns of Lysandra’s moves and get in position to play the next part of her plan; infiltrating the school’s hive. There was no better way to do so, than by going after the queen bee herself.

She had looked up Lysandra’s schedule on the ghost program she had running on her computer, which meant she had all the information about every student only one click away. Once she knew where Lysandra was meant to be at all times, it was easy to figure out the places she was hanging out in between classes. Every day, like a clock, Lysandra went to the bathroom closer to the cafeteria between the second and third period, usually on her own.

On Friday, Celaena made sure to be in that bathroom five minutes beforehand. She was standing in front of the mirror touching up her burgundy lipstick as the queen bee walked in, just as expected.

Lysandra walked in confidently, checked her perfect hair in the mirror, adjusted her headband so it was placed just at the right angle, and then looked to her side, noticing Celaena standing there. Celaena’s chin was held high as she perfected the last touches of her own makeup and looked into the mirror, staring at her own brown eyes. She was still not used to them, they seemed so dull, but it had been fun to play with eyeshadow colors that would have normally clashed with her turquoise irises.

“Hey,” Celaena said as she finished up and looked at Lysandra. She used the same sweet tone she normally used when asking Arobynn for a favor.

“Hi,” Lysandra replied, looking puzzled for a second, but then turning around to fully face her. “I like that lipstick color you’re using; may I?” She added, extending a hand towards Celaena.

“Sure.”

Lysandra grabbed the lipstick off her, rolled it over in her fingers, and then tapped her thin lips with it making their cream color turn almost the same shade as Celaena’s.

Celaena knew it was now or never, she had to swallow her pride and do whatever was needed to make things work, to get closer, to get inside the inner circle. As repulsed as she felt about being one of the popular kids, it was a needed part of her plan.

“I hear tryouts for cheerleaders are next week, are there any openings available?” Celaena asked, playing with her hair and trying to look as innocent as a sheep... As far from reality as possible.

Lysandra looked her up and down before replying.

“You look decent enough, do you go to the gym often? Or were you on the squad in your old school? This is no joke, we take cheering seriously in Adarlan Elite,” she said with a stern voice, but there was a small smile tugging at her lips.

“Give me the chance, and I will prove worthy,” Celaena replied, making sure to say as little as possible. The best way to keep up a lie was by omission, and saying as few untrue facts as possible always helped keep up charades for longer. Being in Adarlan's school was certainly going to be the longest time she had spent as someone else.

“Are you a base or a flyer?” She asked, her emerald eyes still looking Celaena up and down.

“Whatever you need, I can be either, but I will rather be a base.”

“Okay,” Lysandra said, and a little smile made the side of her lips tug up. “I’ll see you there next Tuesday, don’t be late, and don’t disappoint me. We actually really need new recruits, most of our best graduated last year,” she finished as she turned around to walk away.

“Won’t,” Celaena said under her breath. There was no way she could disappoint. It was going to be harder to keep her performance on the down-low and not bring too much attention to herself than it was going to be making it into the squad. She had absolutely no doubt that she’d be wearing a cheerleader's uniform by the time training officially started.

As Celaena was left alone in the bathroom, she pictured herself wearing the uniform. The skirt was similar to the everyday uniform, but about half the length of it; and bright yellow with a black waistband instead of the dull grey. She could do that, showing her legs was no issue, she could always attribute the few thin scars to falls, make up a little story here or there about her years cheering back in Terrasen.

No, that wouldn’t be a problem. The problem was going to be the top. The cheerleader's tops were too short, and leaving her lower back exposed wasn’t going to be an option. Standing there alone, she wondered if there was a way to alter the uniform, or if she could wear a cardigan on top of it until she got enough information and excused herself from the team. After all, she didn’t need to be in the squad when the games came around, she most likely only needed to be there at training for a few weeks; she could always claim a sprained ankle after that.

Smiling to herself, Celaena walked out into the hallway and she heard the second bell was ringing. Annoyed with her own distraction, she started walking faster towards her math class. Her scholarship could get compromised if she got in trouble for being late. She could have paid for the fees and avoided the trouble of applying for the scholarship altogether, but there was no point wasting any of her hard-earned fortune on school. Arobynn would have never accepted paying for it, and she didn’t want to ask either. So she depended on her brain, her good grades, and her good behavior.

She hid behind a locker as she watched a teacher walking around a hallway, hoping not to be seen. She needed an idea, and she needed it fast. There was no way she’d be caught in the hallway when classes had already begun, and she couldn’t really sneak into the classroom unseen. Her brain pulled up the blueprint of the school, and she came up with a plan in less than a second.

Once the teacher was out of view, she jumped out and made her way to the end of the hallway as fast as possible, her feet barely touching the floor and making no noise. She looked to both sides before running through another corridor and making her way to the door of the infirmary. She sneaked inside as silent as a ghost and laid on a bed before the nurse would even notice she was there. She closed her eyes, propped an arm over her face, and waited.

It was only a few moments before she heard a surprised gasp, and opened her eyes, moving her arm down and making her eyelids flutter. She looked around confused, making herself blink slowly.

“Where did you come from?” the nurse asked, sounding a little jumpy.

“Sorry,” Celaena said in a pained voice. “I suddenly felt awful, I thought I was going to pass out, a freshman helped me here, I don’t know where he’s gone….” she trailed off, making her eyelids drop, and then reopening them slowly. “I think I just need some rest,” she added.

The nurse was already rushing around her, checking her pulse and putting a hand against her forehead to make sure she didn’t have a fever.

“Your temperature is fine,” the lady said, and Celaena concentrated on her breathing, making her heartbeat as slowly as she could. “Your pulse is a little weak,” the nurse said soon after, walking around to a little table and searching in the drawers.  
“Let me guess,” the nurse said. “Is it that time of the month?”

Celaena opened her eyes a little as if hearing the greatest news but being too tired to do something about it. “I can’t believe I didn’t think of it, you’re completely right, it’s meant to be tomorrow,” she said, wiping nonexistent sweat off her brows.

“Here,” the nurse said, giving her a glass of water, a painkiller, and a lolly. “The sweet will help get your blood sugar back up. You girls nowadays with your diets, you don’t ever eat enough! I will write you a slip so you can take it to class once you feel better. Stay here for now as I go over to inform the office of your whereabouts.”

With that, the nurse left the room, her wide hips swaying from one side to the other as she entered the room in the back. Celaena looked up at the white roof and sighed. It would be embarrassing to get to class too late, so she thought she might as well fake it till the bell rang. She wouldn't miss much as she probably knew everything in the math curriculum already.

There was still fifteen minutes left when the door to the infirmary opened up, and Chaol Westfall walked in. He didn’t look surprised to find Celaena there, and she wondered if she was the sole reason he had come around.

“Celaena,” he said as a way of hello.

“Chaol,” she replied, making her voice sound as flat as possible.

“Ms. Doranelle sent me over to check on you, she’s going to take the last ten minutes of class to do a surprise test and she’d want you to be a part of it if you’re feeling better,” he said as he stood with his back against the open door.

Celaena lifted her brows, not being able to believe that they would send over for her for something so trivial. She let her eyelids half drop, making her look tired again.

“I’m not sure I’m ready to go back,” she replied in a weak tone. Chaol didn’t look convinced as he took a step towards her.

“You shouldn’t fake sickness, what’s even wrong with you? Your stomach? Do you have any kind of illness?” He asked, taking another step towards her as if daring her to lie to his face. Celaena had wondered before about the weirdness of this nerd being Dorian’s best friend, but she could now see they shared their clear stubbornness.

“I’m not that kind of sick,” Celaena said, a little smug smile tugging on her lips.

“Then, what’s wrong with you?” Chaol asked, his eyebrows raised again.

“It’s... That time of the month, you know,” Celaena replied, containing the laughter.

Chaol’s expression changed, his brows lifting higher up, and then dropping all the way down. He took a step backward and almost tripped as his cheeks flushed red and his lips went pale.

“Oh, yeah, that... sorry,” he muttered as he took another step back and turned around, almost tripping with the doorframe as he bolted out of the room.

Celaena laughed then, a real laugh, and had to cover her mouth not to startle the nurse, who was still inside her little office.

The rest of the day passed in a breeze, and Celaena found herself content at the end of the day, realizing she had survived her first week of high school. She reminded herself that she was strong, that the years on the streets had taught her everything she needed to know about the world, and that if she could survive Arobynn, then she could certainly survive school.

When she jumped up on her bike at the end of the day, she was grinning from ear to ear. The ride to the mansion would only take a few minutes, so she took a detour and rode around town for a while, letting the wind mess up her hair. She was glad for the thrill, for the rush of adrenaline that made her feel alive, for the freedom of being able to ride the roads without worrying about prying eyes.

Once she made it into the mansion, she was surprised to find Arobynn and Sam in the foyer. Cortland still had his school backpack hanging from a shoulder, and his posture seemed a little tighter than normal. Celaena had learned to read his postures and expressions after spending so much of their time training together, and she could tell something was going on, something had happened.

“Afternoon,” Arobynn greeted her as she reached them in the middle of the foyer. She composed her face into a pleasant smile and stood a step behind Sam.

“You’re not one to wait by the foyer, what’s going on here?” She asked, her brows rising slightly.

“I was just sharing some developments and news with Sam,” Arobynn announced. Sam’s back was straight, and his chin was tilted up, looking right into Arobynn’s grey eyes.

“Spit it out, and tell me what’s happening, Arobynn. Does it have anything to do with my parents and my mission?” She asked, unable to keep her cool any longer.

“Nothing to do with you Celaena,” Arobynn dismissed her with a shake of his hand. “There’s a tournament coming up in a few weeks, and I know Sam here is ready to step up.” He said as he looked back at his subordinate. Arobynn’s stern posture wasn’t giving anything away. “Sam will be joining the guild.”

Celaena’s heart leaped, and she glanced at Sam without even thinking about it. His posture was still rigid and his jaw was clenched as he nodded once, his eyes fixed on Arobynn’s. She looked back to the older man, who looked barely a few years older than them with his long auburn hair, and she forced herself to smile.

“Congratulations, Cortland,” she said.


	6. Reminiscing

The days turned into a week, and Celaena wasn’t any closer to finding out anything about what had happened with her family. She had managed to settle into a good routine, her body was almost used to day time, and a little golden glow was starting to show on her cheeks and hands as well as her legs, the only parts of her body that were seeing the light of day. 

She was making up a plan to sneak into the top floor, where Dorian’s father's penthouse was, when she heard the front door of her suite creaking open. She stood up slowly and moved over to the wall, pressing her body behind her bedroom’s door, waiting. She listened to the light steps on the hallway getting closer, and her legs flexed a bit without even thinking about it. She had no weapons in hand, but she didn’t need any. She waited, crouching, listening.

As soon as the steps were on the threshold, they stopped, and Celaena could see the shadow of a man lurking, looking around the room, probably surprised to see it empty. Had Arobynn sent someone to check on her? Or had anybody found out about her? She didn’t have time to think about it because the figure jumped into the room, closing the door behind him in a quick motion and leaving her without cover.

“Gotcha!” A known voice yelled, and Celaena’s fist stopped mid air as a palm collided against it.

“For fuck sake, Cortland!” she screamed. “What the fuck are you doing here? And why would you sneak up on me like that?” She took a step back, looking at Sam up and down and frowning as he let go of her fist.

“For fun?” 

Celaena pressed her palms against her face, not able to believe this intrusion to her privacy. Once the shock was gone, she walked over to her bed and dropped into it again, resuming her relaxed position from only a minute ago. 

"So, are you going to explain what brings you here?" She asked, nonchalant, as Sam still stood by the door. 

"Thought I'd check on you, we've been in school for two weeks already, you made it into the cheer squad and you start training on Monday, I'm just wondering what you're going to do about…" Sam looked lost for words, and looked down, red colouring his cheeks. 

"You're worrying about me wearing the uniform? Why don't you mind your own fucking business, Cortland?!" She said outraged, standing up and walking right past him and out of the room. Sam trailed behind her, and she could almost feel the apology stuck in his throat. 

"Sorry," he said once Celaena reached the mini bar and pulled out a can of cream soda. 

"Why are you even here? What if anybody saw you coming in? Dorian could be around-" 

"Do you think I'm that stupid?" Sam cut in. "No one saw me, I can get in and out of this building without a single pair of eyes catching sight of me, and you more than anyone should know that!" He almost almost growled at her. 

They were standing right in front of each other now, anger burning their skins and flushing their cheeks. It was a stand-off, one that Celaena didn't plan on losing. 

"I don't need your help," she said for what felt like the millionth time. 

"You can't always do everything on your own, Celaena," Sam said, his voice turning softer as he said her name and took a step back. He turned his back on her, running a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry for what happened that day, I could never apologise, you keep shutting me out, and I… I was only trying to help-" 

"Out!" Celaena growled. "Get out of here before I rip your throat out." Tears were threatening to come out, burning behind her eyes. 

Sam turned around slowly and looked at her with such sadness in his eyes, that she almost broke. 

"Now," she said, a bit softer. It was a plea, and she could tell Sam knew how she felt. After all, they had been close enough to know each other like no one else did. 

Sam nodded once, slowly, and made his way to the same door through which he had entered merely minutes ago. Before closing the door behind him, he peered in and looked at her turquoise eyes. 

"I really am sorry, I will forever feel guilty for what involvement I had in what happened, and I know I could never make it up to you, but I wish I could." And then he was gone, the door now closed between them. 

Celaena breathed in deeply, trying to avoid the memories from that night from catching up with her. She had been so close to getting out, so close to success before Arobynn's men had found her. She had been stupid, and reckless, and she had been fully aware of the consequences her actions could have brought. But no, it had been so much more, it had been torture, humiliation, and so much pain. 

Her hand mindlessly moved to her lower back, rubbing the harsh skin close to her tailbone. The worst of the scarring was low enough to be hidden by high waisted pants, and she thought, hopeful, that she could adapt the uniform to hide them too. She went back to her bedroom, grabbed the cheerleader uniform off the dresser and tried it on. 

"I can work with this," she told her reflection. She could raise the waist line without problem.

She dropped back on the bed and opened up her computer, thinking about checking up the blueprint of the hotel again. She wanted to work out the best way to get to the penthouse on the floor above so she could set up some hidden cameras. To her surprise, she found a bunch of messages on the screen instead. 

Nehemia: Are you going to the party? I would love to see you there my dear friend!

Dorian: I'll have a cocktail made in your name if you delight me with your presence tonight. 

Lysandra: Party at Dorian's tonight, it's Friday, and you're part of the hive now, so I expect to see you there. 

Celaena wondered if that was the real reason Cortland had shown up at the hotel. Maybe he wanted to see if she was going to Dorian's party. She was absolutely sure the guy would have gotten an invite too. He had become a pretty popular kid, even if he didn't mingle with the same crowd she did. Sam had befriended almost everybody at Adarlan Elite High in as little as two weeks. He was the one every single girl was dreaming about, like a new toy that they wanted to possess. She could see the appeal, there was no denying that Sam was really good looking. 

There was a rough history between them, one that was a bit like a broken rollercoaster ride.

Celaena still remembered the day she had arrived at Arobynn's mansion. He had carried her broken and tired body up the stairs, and had nested her in a bed with warm blankets. A doctor had come over to check on her, and multiple people had tried to ask what was wrong with her, what had happened. She couldn't talk about it, she couldn't get herself to express out loud what she thought had happened. 

In the middle of that first night, she had woken up screaming, terrified. She had had a nightmare about the plane crash, she had felt the collision against the water again, she had seen her parents disappear under a mass of water as her mother had pulled on the tag of her safety vest. The young version of herself had held her breath as soon as the water had filled the plane’s cabin, and her body had shot up through the surface, her shoulder bumping against the wreckage as she soared up. In reality, she had made it out, but she had dreamed of water filling up her lungs and flames engulfing her world instead. 

She had woken up sweaty, screaming, and had found a pair of small hands steading her, a little voice telling her everything was going to be alright. For a moment, she had thought it was Aedion by her side, but this kid hadn't had blond curls, but short light brown hair instead; and his eyes weren't bright turquoise as hers, they were the colour of honey. 

"It's okay, you're okay, it was just a nightmare," the kid had said. 

"Who are you?" She had asked, feeling lost and confused. 

"I'm Sam, I live here, with Arobynn... The man who found you," he explained as the girl Celaena had been back then, had looked at him wide eyed. 

She had remembered then that a man had found her on the shore after who knew how long. She had expected him to take her to the police, like they did in the movies, but there had been no patrols, no lights, no ambulances. Just a black car with tinted windows taking her into a big house. 

"Where are my parents? Where's mum?" She had asked the boy when the memories had hit her all over again, her eyes still soaked with tears.

"Girl," he had said softly. "Your parents are dead."

She had cursed and screamed and yelled, and through it all, Sam had sat there patiently, waiting for the tantrum to be over while he tried to comfort her with soft words. 

"It will be okay, you get used to it after some time.” He had said after she calmed down. “My parents died years ago, and I don't even remember them much." The young blond girl had thought he didn't sound as sad as he should have been about their deaths. 

"You know nothing!" She had spat on his face. "I'm not like you, and I will never forget my parents!" 

That had been the start or the turmoil. The first few weeks at Arobynn's place she had been so angry with the brown haired boy for implying such horrible things that she had stayed away from him, or insulted him whenever they crossed paths. Eventually, young Sam had stopped trying to befriend her. 

When they started training in combat by the age of 12, they automatically became rivals, like it was meant to be. There were other kids around, others that came and went, but the two of them were the best ones, the ones that were constantly in the spotlight of Arobynn’s attention. They pushed themselves to beat one another, and that’s why they had become the best. That was the same reason why they had come to know each other so well. 

Celaena laughed at the memories, lying back on her bed. 

Their relationship had gotten better by the time they became teens as they had no other option but to work together. They had to learn how to fight side by side instead of always against each other when they had joined a few illegal tournaments as partners. It had helped them learn about teamwork and tolerance, but Celaena had still kept her distance. 

Teen fighting was something they had endured for the past three years. Arobynn was one of the biggest gamblers in the scene, and he had made a lot of money out of the pair. 

The rules were few, but they were inflexible: 

-No punching on the face, as no one wants to bring the authorities’ attention to a heap of kids with balck eyes and broken jaws.

-Last kid standing, wins.

-Only kids under 17 years of age allowed.

Simple and efficient. The fights always took place in underground basements that looked more like dungeons in the middle of the night, and that had been most of Sam and Celaena’s lives for the past years. The fighting had only been interrupted by break and entry, and a few espionage missions. _Just your typical teen life_ , Celaena thought, and laughed to herself.

The guild though, that was at another level. They were Arobynn’s most trained and elite fighters, the ones that formed his inner circle.

Celaena thought about the tournament Arobynn had talked about. She knew good money would be involved, and she couldn’t lie to herself, she enjoyed the fighting. She wondered why she hadn’t been selected for it. Truth was that there had never been any females in the guild, but Celaena had always been hopeful that she could be the first one, that she was strong enough to make it into Arobynn’s team of most skilled and profitable fighters. But that had been all before the incident. 

Suddenly pissed off, Celaena closed the computer and stood up from the bed, walking over to her dresser.

“Fucking Sam Cortland,” she muttered as she ruffled through her clothes.

Not only had he taken her place on the guild, but he had gone and fucked everything up a few months back. He had betrayed her, and it had cost her greatly. Not only physically, but her relationship with Arobynn was now strained, and she couldn’t help but blame her lack of involvement with the guild with what had happened back then. Arobynn didn't fully trust her anymore but she needed as much money as she could, she needed to solve her parents murder to make sure she could pay him back what she owed him, and move along. 

She was ready to buy her freedom. But Arobynn’s fees were high.

She put on her black leather leggings, the ones that had net cut outs and transparencies on the upper tights, and then laced up her black high heel boots. She found a V neck dark purple top with long sleeves, and then rolled them halfway up to her elbows. She stood in front of the mirror for a moment, putting on her contacts back, touching up her makeup and adding some deep purple lipstick. 

There was a party she needed to attend to, and an office she wanted to break into.


	7. Pretending to be a normal teen

Celaena decided on an inconspicuous entrance to the party: jumping over the tall back fence of Dorian’s residential House and landing around an area with few people. She showed up in the backyard as if materializing out of thin air. She knew there was no point sneaking in, and that she could have just used the front door as everybody else did, but she wasn’t like everybody. It was thrilling to do things her own way, and especially to sneak past security without being seen. It was also good practice for a possible future.

Nehemia found her almost instantly, showing up by her side with two red plastic cups in her hands as if she knew she was about to arrive.

“I’ve been looking for you, my friend,” she said happily as she passed her over one of the drinks. “How long have you been here for?”

“Just a little while,” Celaena smiled.

“Dorian’s parties are always the best,” Nehemia replied. “I’ve been here for a while myself,” she said casually as she wrapped an arm around Celaena's shoulders.

Her body went stiff automatically, and she had to make herself relax into the touch. She was so unused to people being nice that she even wondered if all girls treated their friends like that.

“What do people normally do here?” She asked, and noticing Nehemia’s raised eyebrows, she corrected herself. “I mean, are there any particular games you play in Rifthold or anything I need to be aware of to fit in?”

“You’d fit in even if you didn’t want to,” Nehemia replied, sounding almost a little sad. “But no, there’s nothing special here. The bees normally drink a bit and dance, except during the season, when they stop drinking in order to stay in shape, some of them do sometimes indulge in some other… forms of intoxication, but most people here are clean,” she said, looking away from her and into the house.  
Celaena looked at Nehemia’s thin brows lowering and wondered why this girl was so worried about those kinds of things. She knew for a fact that drug and alcohol abuse had skyrocketed in the lower levels in the past few years. She knew about it from third-party experiences and things she had seen in dark alleys and dodgy basements. She had seen the effects some of those drugs had on the young kids that spent their nights on the streets, looking for their next fix. She wasn't surprised to hear it had made it to the upper levels too. 

“Do you ever… you know?” Celaena asked, being a little more direct than she normally would be.

“No, I hate that shit!” Nehemia snapped as she let go of Celaena’s shoulder and wrapped that same arm around her own torso. Deciding not to push the matter, and feeling a little bad about upsetting the only girl that had tried to befriend her, Celaena decided to get out of her comfort zone to cheer Nehemia up.

“Come on,” she said. “Let’s go inside and see if there’s any dancing going around.”

Nehemia’s dark eyes lit back up like two opals shining under the moonlight. 

“I’d love to dance!” She said happily, drowning the remaining of her drink and tossing the cup into a nearby bin.

If the yard was packed with groups of students talking, drinking, and playing, the inside of the house was even fuller. The furniture from the massive living room had been pushed to the walls, where a few people were lounging on the couches. And in the middle, there was a big dance floor where most of the cheerleaders were dancing, their arms in the air, red plastic cups in their hands. 

Nehemia and Celaena joined the throng of girls and the few boys on the made-up dancefloor, swaying to the rhythm of the music. A few eyes darted their way, and after a moment there were guys asking to dance with them. Hands were wrapping around their waists and bodies were brushing against them from all sides. The music, the lights, the faint smell of smoke, it was almost intoxicating; and Celaena felt like she was in the middle of a disco. Even if just for a fraction of a second, she forgot all about her worries, her mission, her secrets, and she let her body get lost to the notes and pulses running through her body.

She was so lost in the music, that she didn’t notice Sam dancing by her side until he wrapped an arm around her waist. She snapped her eyes up to him, and pulled on a playful smile, telling herself it was for the crowd around them.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, Cortland?” she whispered in his ear, just loud enough for him to hear her over the music.

Sam put both of his hands in her waist and followed her movements before leaning closer and whispering in her ear.

“Apologizing. And I thought this was the best way to start out a real-life relationship, you know? A way for people to see that we are.. getting to know each other. You won’t be able to avoid me at school anymore,” he said, making her heart leap in annoyance.

“You are unbelievable,” she said to him, not worrying about whispering anymore.

“And you are a fantastic dancer,” he said, loud enough for the few people around them to hear him. He had the biggest smile on his face, a little dimple showing on one side, which melted Celaena’s barriers in an almost imperceptible way.

There was nothing she could do to get away while being in front of so many people, so she kept dancing, pretending that she wasn’t too interested in the guy in front of her. But at the same time, not showing her contained anger through any of her movements.

When the song ended, Dorian approached them, showing up from in between the crowd.

“Could I have the next dance?” he asked, shoving Sam to the side lightly with a shoulder and boring into Celaena’s eyes. Sam huffed, and stood his ground, but didn’t say a thing.

After looking back and forth between them, Celaena fanned herself with a hand and pretended to be exhausted.

“Actually,” she said, “I need a breather, Nehemia?” she asked as she turned around to look for her new acquaintance. “Keen on some fresh air?”

“Sure! Let’s go,” the girl replied as she grabbed her long dreads with both hands and tried to tie them up into a bun on top of her head. “It’s so hot in there,” she said as she pulled a red silk band off her wrist and secured her messy bun with it.

Both girls sat on the grass, their legs stretched forwards as they leaned on their elbows. Celaena’s feelings were jumbled as she realized she really did like the girl sitting next to her, and she hoped for a moment that she was under different circumstances. There was no way she could start a friendship based on so many lies, and this girl didn’t even know her real name to start with.

“Oh, there comes your new team,” Nehemia said, taking her out of her daydream. Only a second later, Lysandra was standing in front of them, a few more cheerleaders trailing behind her.

“Enjoying the party?” The queen bee asked.

“We are,” both of the girls sitting on the grass replied at the same time.

“Just keep your drinking on the down-low,” Lysandra said looking at Celaena. “You should take care of your body.”

“Sure thing, I don’t drink much anyway.” Celaena leaned back further, looking up at the sky.

She knew she was meant to get involved with Adarlan’s cheering bees, but she wasn’t feeling it at the moment. Truth was, she was really enjoying Nehemia's company. And Lysandra sounded cocky and stuck up, and she didn’t want to spend any time with her outside of practice if she could avoid it.

“Sweet,” she heard Lysandra say in a nonchalant tone. “Will see you ‘round.” The queen bee walked away with the rest of the hive trailing behind her. The two following closely behind and holding hands were Thea and Kaya, a clear example that opposites attract each other. Thea’s pale skin contrasted against Kaya’s golden tan, and while the first one had straight ash-blond hair that brushed her tailbone, the second one had dark auburn curls, which barely reached her shoulders. Thea’s eyes were the darkest shade of brown, but they glistened whenever she looked into her partner’s baby blue eyes.

The other two to the back were Briar and Imogen, two sophomores that had made the team during tryouts as well as herself. Briar seemed like a nice girl, with kind blue eyes that popped like bright lights now that her hair was as dark as Nehemias’. Celaena thought it bold that she had dyed her natural ash-blond hair, and she almost liked the girl for showing her bravery like that. Imogen on the other hand was a mystery. She had entered as a base, and the skinny girl surely was strong. What puzzled her the most though, were her midnight eyes that seemed to hide so many secrets; it didn’t help that she rarely smiled.

Celaena watched as they all walked away to the opposite end of the yard, where Lysandra wrapped her arms around Aedion’s neck as the cheers joined the team.

“Keen on some more dancing?” She asked standing up and reaching a hand down to help the girl by her side to her feet.

“I’m always keen on dancing,” Nehemia replied with a huge smile.

The music was still blasting inside, and as soon as they made it through the glass doors, the volume seemed to double. They went straight to the middle of the dance floor, where a few familiar faces were gathered. She could see Dorian in the middle of a big crowd as he danced with a blond girl that she didn’t think she knew. As soon as his eyes found her, he made his way over slowly as he danced with everybody that he ran into.

“You’re back,” he said as he stood close to her, their bodies swaying in unison. “I still owe you that cocktail if you’re keen,” he said with a grin.

“The one with my name on it?” She asked, mindlessly biting her lip.

“Come on,” Dorian said, grabbing her hand and leading them out of the crowd. She brushed Nehemia’s arm on her way towards the kitchen, letting her know she’d be back soon.

As they stepped into the open plan kitchen, Celaena wondered if there was a single room in the house that wasn’t crowded. There was a couple making out in a corner, a few guys standing around the island in the middle trying to figure out how to connect a keg, and a bunch of girls by the doors that led to a deck, their heads together in gossip.

“What does this cocktail have in it?” She asked Dorian as he found an empty space on the bench and started grabbing a few bottles of spirits and looking through them.

“Well, you’ll have to stick around to find out,” he replied with a grin.

He grabbed a tall glass out of a cabinet and filled it up to the brim with crushed ice. Then he signaled for her to stay where she was, and went out of the room, coming back a moment later with a bottle of aged whiskey.

“That looks extremely expensive,” she pointed out.

“It’s from my father’s collection, so yes, it is, but I needed something just like you. Refined, classy, yet a bit… what is the word I’m looking for?”

“Aged? Are you saying I'm old?” Celaena joked.

“No, not aged,” Dorian said, containing his laughter. “Peated,” he concluded.

Celaena raised her eyebrows at him and smirked. Peated wasn’t a bad word to define her, and she wondered how Dorian could have read her so well so quickly. There was definitely a lot of smoke and ash in her inner self. Dorian poured a measure of the whiskey into the glass, and then laughed to himself.

“My father would kill me if he saw me mixing one of his favorite whiskeys with anything at all, but trust me, this beverage is going to be fantastic, and just like you,” he said.

He walked to the fridge and came back with a can of cream soda, making Celaena lift her brows again. It was even her favorite brand. He filled up half the glass, and then added some soda water until the glass was almost full. After that, he added a splash of raspberry syrup, looking up at her he added, “you seem like a raspberry kind of girl, and there’s certainly a kind of sweetness to you.” She bit her tongue not to say anything and had to make a huge effort not to roll her eyes. She was chewing on her bottom lip as Dorian added a dash of fresh lime juice.  
“That’s to add some acidity,” he laughed. He added a straw and passed the drink over to her.

She took a small and careful sip as Dorian watched her with attentive eyes. She couldn’t help herself as she pressed her lips together and half-closed her eyes.

“That bad?” Dorian asked. 

“No,” she said sarcastically. “It’s… delicious, want some?” She offered him the glass and Dorian tried a sip. He almost spat it out as Celaena started laughing.

“Hey! It’s not that bad!” He said, still laughing while taking a second sip as if trying to prove his point. He struggled to swallow, and Celaena found herself laughing again.

“I need to head over to the bathroom,” she said shyly as their laughter quieted a moment later. “Is there only the one under the stairs where the long queue is?” She asked as she bounced from one foot to the other and pulled on her best pleading eyes.

“I wouldn’t say this to anybody else,” Dorian said as he leaned closer to her, and she knew he had probably used that line another thousand times. “But there’s an on-suite in my bedroom upstairs that you can use, it’s the third door to the right. Just make sure you don’t go looking into my underwear drawer,” he added with a wink. “I can always walk you over too, you know.”

“I’m sure I will find it on my own,” she said as she patted him on the shoulder.

She sneaked between the bodies of half-drunk and completely pissed students that were filling up the halls and made her way to the marble staircase. Once up, she made sure there was no one around before she rushed to the last door at the end of the hall. She tried the handle, but the door was locked. Looking quickly over her shoulder, she pulled a pin from her hair and opened it up. Picking the lock took only five seconds, and she was inside with the door closed behind her before a single soul could see her.

Looking up a room in a blueprint and studying it from security footage was normally enough to give her a clear idea of what to expect and where to look. She went to the computer first and turned it on, the lights blinking to life almost instantly. She pulled a small drive from a hidden pocket in her laced-up boot, and inserted it in the USB port; the program started on its own, and a loading bar showed up on the screen. She had fifteen minutes. 

Celaena rushed to the huge window, and peeked through the curtain, making sure there were no eyes looking her way. She hadn’t turned any lights on in the study not to get attention, but you could never be too careful. She looked through the bookcase that covered the whole wall facing south, and the drawers of the desk before checking the time again. Five minutes left. She checked some more drawers and looked through the papers on top of the desk.

She was about to look around the few shelves on the opposite wall when she heard a noise and stopped dead. She looked to the door and saw the knob move. She glanced at the screen: Two minutes left.  
Fuck.


	8. A thanks would do

The dance floor was still packed, the same as it had been since the start of the night. People came and went, but the crowd never diminished. Sam had been dancing to the side of the room for a while, trying to talk with as many people as possible while keeping an eye on Celaena. He hadn’t been surprised when he saw her walking up the marble stairs, and had made sure to start a counter on his wristwatch. 

It was sitting on eleven minutes when Sam started to get fidgety and walked closer to the stairs’ landing while dancing with a girl called Ansel. She was so incredibly full of energy; Sam was almost struggling to keep up. 

“This party is lit!” The girl said as she raised her arms in the air and started spinning around in circles.

Sam used the distraction to leave the girl behind and move closer to the stair, casually lingering around the landing while fake sipping from an empty plastic cup. By the twelfth minute Chaol Westfall, the one he had learned to be Dorian’s best friend, headed up the stairs. He waited until the guy was almost to the top before he rushed up on silent feet. The staircase ended up in a long hallway stretching to the right, and a dead-end to the left. Sam peeked through the corner, watching Chaol walk halfway across the hallway and stop in front of a door. His hand sat on the knob for a moment before he looked to the side, towards the end of the hall, and kept walking.

“For fucks sake,” Sam murmured under his breath.

He tiptoed the first half of the hallway and once he was there, Chaol’s hand on the knob of the last door, he purposely tripped with the carpet and cursed out loud. Chaol almost jumped up as he turned around, his brows tightly knit together.

“What are you doing here?” The student president asked in a stern voice.

“So- So sorry, mate,” Sam half slurred. “They-Someone… told me there was a- agh- toilet up here,” he finished as he scratched the back of his neck, holding himself against the wall with one hand.

“You shouldn’t be up here,” Chaol said as he walked towards him. “There’s a bathroom downstairs you can use.”

“There was a - agh - really long - que… queue,” he finished as he stretched an arm and rested it on Chaol’s shoulder for extra support. “I’m really... busting.”

“Come here, I’ll show you the way to the secret bathroom out back, Dorian will kill you if you puke up here,” he continued. “He will get the place professionally cleaned up before his father is back in town, but still, he hates when people sneak up.” Chaol kept talking almost to himself as he walked Sam down the hall and towards the stairs. 

Sam looked back just in time to see Celaena peeking through the door before they turned the corner.

“You owe me,” he said under his breath, low enough for his voice to be lost under the music that was already reaching them from below.

***

All everybody was talking about on Monday morning was how amazing Dorian’s party had been. But all Sam could think about, was how close of a call it had been. He was sure Celaena had a plan B and could have gotten out of it, but any kind of suspicion could have ruined her plan. They were lucky no one had found anything out, and Celaena had shown back in the middle of the dance floor minutes later, dancing around as if she had never left.

He hadn't told Arobynn about the incident, he was too scared he would have scolded Celaena for being careless and almost getting caught. He was risking his neck by keeping that information to himself, but it was worth the risk. And obviously, Celaena hadn’t thanked him for the help. She hadn’t even spoken a word to him since the party.

Once lunchtime came over, Sam was feeling restless after thinking for so long. He needed something to do, he was probably just not used to the quietness. He had had a really busy weekend training for the fights to come, and sitting still wasn’t resonating with him. The tournament was set to start in a month, but he had a fight on the weekend to win his place in the competition, which meant he had trained hard, his muscles still aching from the strain he had caused his body.

He looked up at Celaena, who was eating her lunch with the exchange student again before he decided to go for a walk. He hung his bag from his shoulder and started circulating the hallways, pretending to be mindlessly walking while he tried to catch on anything unusual. He hadn’t studied the building as much as Celaena had, and he was always glad for any spare time to get to know the place better.

The halls were almost deserted and fairly quiet, which was probably why he heard the soft sobs coming from one of the classrooms. He headed straight towards the sound, opening the door slowly and finding a girl with her head hidden between her arms. All he could see was a mass of dark brown hair spilled onto the desktop. 

“Are you okay?” He asked as he approached the crying girl, carefully placing a hand on her forearm.

As the girl looked up, her emerald eyes made Sam’s gut twist at the sadness behind them. Her eyes were red-rimmed, with tears pooling in the corners. She looked puzzled for a moment, as if unsure of what to say.

“I’ll be alright,” she said in a small voice. “Just… leave me alone, I didn’t think anybody would find me here.” She turned around, hiding her face between her arms again.

Unsure of how to proceed, Sam sat on the floor next to her, his legs crossed.

“I think I’ll stick around in case you want to talk to someone, I promise I won’t bother you, but you shouldn’t be alone while you’re in pain,” he said. “I’ll be quiet,” he added.

She looked down at him with fresh tears running down her cheeks. “Why would you do this? You don’t even know me,” she said between quiet sobs.

“I don’t need to know you in order to care, Lysandra,” he said. She didn’t seem surprised that he knew her name, but why would she? Everybody in school knew who she was.

“Sorry, I don’t even know your name,” she said as she wiped her tears and tried to smile a little.

“I’m Sam, Sam Cortland.” He extended his hand, and Lysandra shook it with a chuckle.

“Why are you being so nice to me?”

“You’re distressed, I know I would like someone to be by my side if I was in your position, so here I am. I can listen to what’s troubling you, or I can just sit here in silence. If you like it better, we can chat about the weather or any other non-important matters to keep your mind off whatever is troubling you,” he offered.

Lysandra wiped the remaining tears with the palm of her hand, seeming calmer after Sam’s little monologue. She took out a small mirror from her bag and opened it up. 

“Don’t think I’m superficial, but I rather people not notice I’ve been crying,” she explained as she fixed her makeup, adding some mascara and then concealer under her eyes.

“Here, look at me,” Sam said as he pushed her chin lightly to make her look his way. “Hmmm, I can’t even tell, your eyes look brighter if that’s even possible, but you look as good as you do every day,” he concluded with a smile as he let go of her chin and stood up, offering her a hand. “Would you like to head back to the cafeteria?”

Lysandra accepted his hand to get to her feet but shook her head in denial. She smiled warmly at him for a moment, and then looked down to her feet.

“That would only lead to trouble, and the bell is probably about to ring. I’ll head straight to my next class, but thank you, Sam Cortland,” she looked up as she said his name, and started to walk towards the door.

“I’m always here to help,” Sam said as he followed her towards the door.

Lysandra walked through the threshold and turned left almost at the same time that Sam went out the door barely a step behind her, and turned the other direction. He was watching the girl walk away, and didn’t notice the small group of people coming back from the cafeteria already, making him bump straight into someone’s chest.

“Sorry,” he muttered as he took a step back and looked up.

“Look where you’re going, you fucking newby!” The guy he had bumped into said. Sam took an extra step back, feeling the angry energy that was emanating from the guy. He knew his kind, and he could tell anything he said would be used as an excuse to start a fight. 

There were already a few curious eyes looking their way, making him confirm his suspicions that the guy meant trouble.

“Sorry mate, my bad,” Sam said with his palms raised, trying to look smaller than he was as he rounded his shoulders inwards.

The guy standing in front of him took a step forward. He wasn’t taller than Sam, maybe even an inch shorter, but as the guy cracked his knuckles, Sam realized he wasn’t alone. Two taller guys were towering behind the first one, keeping watch.

“What were you doing, getting out of a room with a taken girl?” The bully said loud enough for the whole hall to hear as he pointed at Lysandra as if looking for an excuse to get mad at him. Sam looked over his shoulder and found the girl frozen in place only a few steps behind him.

“Leave her out of this,” Sam said, taking a protective step forward. “She’s got nothing to do with whatever is going on here.” He pointed to the narrow gap in between them. 

The guy closed that gap, grabbing a fist full of Sam’s shirt by its collar. He ran his other hand through his short black hair as a chuckle escaped his lips and his equally dark eyes bored into Sam’s golden ones. 

“What is going on here, is that you're about to get a black eye for being a smart ass,” he spat on his face.

“Look, mate,” Sam said with his hands still lifted in front of him, showing his palms. “I don’t even know you, sorry I bumped into you. Now, let’s just be mature about this and move on.” He smiled then, and he knew straight away that was the wrong thing to do. He knew the type all too well, the guy in front of him was going to have his head just for existing, just because he could feel a different vibe coming out of him; just because he felt threatened. 

He wished he could explain he was no competition to him.

“I’m Rourke,” the guy said with a grin. “And now that we know each other, junior, let’s teach you a lesson.”

Before Sam could even blink, Rourke’s fist collided against his jaw.


	9. I will not be afraid

He had to admit, Rourke had a strong punch and was decently fast. Sam’s head snapped to the side as the fist collided with his jaw. He turned back around to face Rourke, and the fist found him again, hitting the cheekbone right next to his eye.

He noticed the little crowd forming around them, and heard Lysandra’s pleading scream, but Rourke didn’t let go of his shirt, and his two friends were keeping an eye on both ends of the hall; probably ready to tell them if any teachers were to come around. Sam’s senses were on high alert, and he clenched a fist as he tasted blood.

“Not going to fight back?” Rourke growled as he took a quick jab at Sam’s stomach.

Sam doubled over, his breath coming out of him in one fast burst. He could so easily break this guy’s jaw, but no, he couldn’t. The crowd around them had grown too big, and he couldn’t risk it. He unclenched his fist as he tried to take a deep breath and steady his mind. _My name is Sam Cortland, and I will not be afraid_ , he thought as he stood back up, his back straight.

With anger flashing in his face and a clenched jaw, Rourke knocked the air out of him again. He punched him on the side, letting go of his shirt. Then again on his chest as Sam looked up. He lifted his knee up to Sam’s stomach as he pushed him down with both hands, getting him right on the sternum.

Sam could taste the blood coating his mouth and feel it dripping down his chin.

Rourke struck against his ribs again, making Sam tumble down. He curled up as soon as his body touched the floor, protecting his head with his hands, and his vital organs with his knees.

Sam took a kick to the side, and then another one. Everything hurt, and he could imagine the bruises already spreading on his skin. A fist collided against the back of his shoulder, and a boot to his kidneys made him arch back. He had been through worse, he told himself. He could take a beating from a school bully. _My name is Sam Cortland, and I will not be afraid_ , he repeated his mantra inside his head.

As another kick hit his lower back, he looked at the crowd between his fingers. He found a pair of dark eyes staring down at him within a face that almost looked concerned. He must have gotten a blow to the head because there was no way Celaena was worried about him. He managed to wink at her quickly before covering his head again as he saw another kick coming his way.

“Hey!” A voice yelled from somewhere close, and Sam heard a loud metallic bang before the foot hit him.

After a moment of lying still and no more blows coming his way, he assessed his injuries by taking a few deep breaths to make sure nothing was broken. No punctured lungs or broken ribs, he thought as he tried to sit down and looked around.

“What in God’s name is going on here?” Principal Allsbrook’s voice reached him in between the crowd.

Sam looked perplexed at the four boys holding back Rourke’s bulky friends. He didn’t really know any of them, but he knew they were on the football team. He looked to his side, to the place from where the metallic bang had come from, and he almost gasped as he saw Aedion holding Rourke against the lockers. His forearm was pressed hard against the bully’s throat. The skin around Rourke’s eye was already turning purple, and he had a cut on his brow.

“Ow, fuck.” Sam winced as he stifled a laugh. He couldn’t deny it, deep down he was glad someone had made that dickhead bleed.

“Are you okay?” Lysandra sounded so worried as she reached his side and kneeled next to him.

“I’ll be 'right,” he said with a wink, and then winced again as the pain in his brow made his head spin.

“Rourke Farran, why am I not surprised?” Principal Allsbrook said with a stern and loud voice as Lysandra rested a hand against Sam’s shoulder. “To my office, now!” The principal barked as Aedion let go of the bully. “Ilias Mesterson, Ress Brulleman, Nox Owen, and Ren Allsbrook,” he said as he turned to the rest of the team holding back the other two bullies, his tone dropping lower as he said the last name. “I would like to believe that you were only interceding to stop the conflict. So let those two go, and all six of you, to my office as well. I will hear all of your explanations of what happened as soon as I deal with this.” He cleared his throat as he motioned for the crowd to disperse. “Ashryver, please help Cortland to the infirmary straight away, then come around to my office for a chat after class.”

Principal Allsbrook gestured again for the crowd to keep walking. “To class, everyone, now!” He barked before walking towards Sam. “Are you okay, son?” He asked as he leaned down.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be 'right,” Sam said one more time.

The principal seemed happy enough with the answer as he walked away, shaking his head as if annoyed to have to deal with the bullies. Sam’s heart started beating faster as Lysandra and Aedion stood one to each side of him and helped him to his feet.

“Holy fuck,” he said as he pressed a hand against his side. “That guy has a decent punch, I reckon he would’ve killed me if you didn’t intercede,” he said as he half smiled up at Aedion.

The team captain just looked at Sam, his lips pressed in a tight line, and then started walking towards the infirmary, his arm holding Sam from under his armpits.

“We’ll be fine, Lys,” Aedion said after a couple of steps. “You should go to class, you wouldn’t want to be late.”

“Yeah, okay, you’re right,” Lysandra gently let go of Sam’s waist from the other side and looked at him for a moment, her eyes full of unshed tears. “Take care of yourself, Sam Cortland." There was a sad smile on her face as she said his full name again.

“I’ll be right,” he repeated one more time, telling himself it was true.

The walk to the infirmary was slow, and Sam felt relieved once they finally made it and he could lie down on the bed.

“What in Hell happened here?” The nurse yelled as she came in running, holding a hand against her open mouth.

“I got cocky,” Sam said with a small smile, only half of his lips curving up as the other side of his face was already too swollen to react. Aedion flinched at his answer, and Sam couldn’t help but wonder why. The team captain was awkwardly standing by the wall as if trying to stay out of the nurse's way.

“Ashryver, what was your involvement in this?” The nurse asked as she snapped her eyes up at him. She was fumbling around Sam as fast as she could, checking his pupils and cleaning his face with a piece of gauze with antiseptic.

Aedion lifted his hands up as in surrender and pressed himself harder against the wall. “Not a thing,” he said, speaking fast. “I wasn’t involved, I only helped Cortland here.”

“Not entirely true,” Sam said as he glanced at him sideways. “Aedion saved me from ending up even worse.”

“Always such a knight in shining armor, Ashryver,” the nurse smiled fondly to herself as she kept cleaning Sam's wounds. Aedion paled at the comment, and looked to the side, making Sam even more curious.

“What do you mean?” Sam asked the nurse as she started patching up the cut on his eyebrow. The nurse smiled warmly, and Sam felt such a motherly feeling coming from her.

“Mr. Ashryver is often breaking fights around here, wouldn’t be the first time I see him in this room,” she said as she finished patching him up. “Now Mr. Cortland, I’m not happy with the way you look and how much damage you sustained, I’m scared you might have a concussion with so much bruising on your face. I’m going to go over and call an ambulance, I want you in the hospital overnight for monitoring.”

Sam’s eyes opened up wide, and he was about to protest, but the nurse just shook her hand in front of his face. “No complaining, my decision is final,” she turned around and walked to the back room where Sam assumed the phone was.

“Fuck,” Sam mumbled under his breath.

Aedion was shifting his weight from one foot to the other, and Sam wanted to tell him he’d be alright, to go away, but he was actually glad for the company. It helped him keep his thoughts from rambling away. Arobynn was going to be pissed off about this.

“I think I should thank you,” he said looking at Aedion and trying to make up a conversation. It was not a good time to think what Arobynn must say or do, he needed to recover first.

“It’s alright, mate,” Aedion said as he chuckled, his normal confident self returning to the surface, even if he still looked somehow uncomfortable.

“Nah, for real, you saved my damn life.”

“I can’t believe that dickhead beat you up badly enough to send you to hospital,” Aedion took a step towards him, sounding angry all of a sudden.

“Is he usually like that?”

“Let’s just say, you’re not the first one, and you won’t be the last… May I ask you something?”

“Sure thing,” Sam was curious about what the team captain would want to know.

“Why didn’t you fight back?” Aedion took another step forward, standing almost next to him.

“What do you mean?” Aedion wasn’t even there when the fight started, how could he know?

“I heard the chatter in the hall, that’s why I went over. They were saying you weren’t even trying, and… why wouldn’t you? I won’t believe you don’t know how to fight, you’re taller than Rourke, you look fit enough...” He trailed off and looked to the side, his cheeks slightly flushed.

“I don’t like fighting,” Sam said, surprised by the truth slipping from his lips; he had never admitted it out loud.

“But you could have at least defended yourself,” Aedion replied, his voice rising up. “What is your father going to say when he has to go pick you up from the hospital looking like this?”

“No one will go pick me up,” Sam said with a sad smile. “I’ve… got no parents; they both died when I was young.”

“Oh, I’m. Fuck. So sorry,” Aedion muttered, coming closer and resting a hand over Sam’s shoulder. “I had no idea.” Sam saw the sadness in his expression; he knew well that Aedion understood the pain of losing a loved one, and he felt guilty as the realization hit him. He shouldn’t have brought up that subject.

“It’s okay, my guardian will pick me up,” he said, trying to sound confident and making an effort not to flinch at the thought.

Before Aedion could reply, the nurse walked back into the room.

“The ambulance is on its way to pick you up,” she said with a kind smile. “Mr. Ashryver, you can head back to class, I’ll look after Mr. Cortland until his ride arrives.” Aedion nodded once as he took a step back.

“Well… Get better,” he said before walking out the door.  
“He is such a good kid,” the nurse said as she watched him walk away. “The other kids think he’s a bit of a bad boy, but I’ve seen him looking after people in here. That kid has a kind soul,” she was talking almost to herself as she checked Sam’d bandages. “Okay, let’s get you up, I’ll help you to the door, I don’t think you’d want for them to carry you out on a stretcher,” she said, and then laughed.

“You already know me too well,” Sam replied with a huge smile. “By the way, I never caught your name,” he asked as she helped him to his feet.

“I’m Silba, and thanks for asking, you’re probably the first to do so in such a long time.”

***

When Sam woke up in the morning, it only took him a second to remember he was still at the hospital. The smell of antiseptics was lingering in the air and there was too much light in the room as he opened his eyes.

“Morning, sleepyhead,” a sweet voice said by his side.

Surprised, he turned around and smiled at the girl grinning back at him.

“What are you doing here?” He sat up, and pain pinched him on the side as he moved.

“How did you put it yesterday? ‘You shouldn’t be alone while you're in pain’,” Lysandra quoted him with the biggest smile.

“That smile suits you,” he said without thinking.

“Thanks, how are you feeling? Do you want to talk about it? Or do you rather we speak about the beautiful weather outside?” She leaned back in the chair she was seating on, looking confident and comfortable in the little room.

Sam couldn’t help but smile back at her, he was so glad to have someone that actually cared by his side. It was nice for a change.


	10. Finding clues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New update agenda! I'm going to be updating 3 times per week from now on! And had a tiny change of plans, so updates will be Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays so they don't clash with my updates on Wattpad and Inkitt :D
> 
> Thanks so much for getting this far! Feel free to drop me some comments, I love to hear what you think, and this is still an ongoing project so it's always cool to see what you're all thinking, you might even influence where I take this story! ;)

Parking the motorbike around the back, Celaena jumped down and straightened her jacket. She had such mixed feelings about what had happened the day before. One part of her had almost enjoyed watching Sam get beaten up, as she was still angry with him for showing up in the hotel as he did on Saturday. But soon after the second punch, it had been so hard not to jump in and beat the shit out of that Rourke guy. She knew Sam could have beaten him up into a pulp, but that would have drawn unwanted attention. She could have done the same, but it wasn’t a smart option.

She had been angry at Sam, but no amount of anger was an excuse for the way that guy had beaten him up. She almost felt sorry for him now, and couldn’t stop thinking about why Sam hadn't even attempted to defend himself. He could have deflected a punch or two, and it would have seemed more natural than him not doing anything at all.

As she exited the lift onto the third floor of the hospital, she released her breath loudly. He was going to hear a piece of her mind, Sam had been so stupid, and now the competition was probably endangered too. Arobynn had been furious when Celaena had gone to the mansion the night before and explained why Sam wouldn’t be there that night. He had tried to play it cool, but Celaena knew Arobynn was having second thoughts about the whole school situation.

She needed answers, and she needed them fast. She had looked through Dorian Sr’s computer files not finding anything relevant; so she had decided she needed to get inside Aedion’s house as well as the penthouse of the hotel. Maybe her uncle’s computer or office would hold better answers. She wouldn’t dare go to the company, not just yet; not unless she really had to. As she got to the door of room 303, Celaena stopped in her tracks as she heard voices inside. Had Arobynn changed his mind and gone to see Sam? She didn’t think he would, he had said Sam could find his way back to the house on his own once he was dismissed.

“You’re so funny, Sam,” she heard a feminine voice say sarcastically. She stood right by the side of the door, eavesdropping casually while trying not to get the attention of the few people walking past. She took her phone out for extra measure and pretended to text someone.

“Honestly, I don’t know why you worry so much about it, I’m sure it will be fine,” Sam was saying.

“I don’t know, I’m just not sure about any of it anymore.” Celaena knew she had heard that voice before. She squeezed her brain for an answer, trying to think about anybody that would visit Sam. It wasn’t like either of them were acquainted with many people. There were only those in the guild, which were mostly all males, and the few girls that had come and gone from the house, training with Arobynn sporadically. But they didn’t have a close relationship with any of them.

“Lys, trust me, everything will work itself out.”

“Lysandra?” Celaena muttered under her breath. She couldn’t contain her curiosity any longer, so she peeked through the door, pushing it open only an inch.

Sam was lying on the hospital bed, a bandage on his eyebrow, his lip swollen and one of his arms resting on top of his abdomen on a cast. And there she was, sitting next to him and resting her hand on Sam’s forearm: Lysandra Caraverre.

Before she could do anything stupid, Celaena turned around and walked towards the emergency exit, taking the steps two at a time as she raced down the stairs and all the way back to her motorbike.  
She jumped up, put her helmet on, and sprinted out of the parking lot, heading straight to school. She had been to the hospital early to have some time to discuss strategies with Sam and give him a piece of her mind; and now she was going to be early to school because Lysandra, of all people, had been there with him instead.

Before she could think about where she was going, she took a right turn and headed towards the mansion instead.

“Arobynn!” She called minutes later as she stumbled into his office, banging the door open. She stopped in her tracks as she noticed the empty room. She turned on her heels, and yelled his name again into the silence of the house. Nothing. “Is there anybody home?” She yelled a little louder, almost glad to notice she was all alone.

Celaena took a step into the office and closed the door behind her. She knew that if Arobynn ever found her lurking in his office, she’d be dead meat, but sometimes she couldn’t help her curiosity. Arobynn had been a bit on edge about a few things, and since the incident between them, he hadn’t trusted her as much. She had been wondering for a while if he was hiding something new, something she didn't know about. With the tournament coming up in a couple of weeks, she almost expected to find bets against Sam. Arobynn was known to hold dodgy cards under his sleeve, and there had been something weird about his reaction when she told him Sam had been beaten up at school. Had he played one of his dirty tricks and set up Sam to lose? She knew Cortland was good, but she knew he wasn't fond of fighting, even if he tried to hide it.

Celaena looked through the papers on top of the desk, one eye always on the door. When she didn’t find anything, she opened the first drawer and looked around the folders until she found some papers concerning the tournament inside an envelope.

She took out some slips from bets Arobynn had made, and she was only half surprised to find out he had put money onto Sam winning the competition. Celaena couldn’t deny that Sam had the potential to win, he was an amazing fighter- when he defended himself. Annoyed at him again, she huffed. She was about to put the papers away when she noticed who the slip was addressed to. The name was right there, on the corner of the page: Maeve Galathynius.

Before she could get over the shock, she heard the front door banging and put everything away as fast as she could. She slipped out of the office and exited the house through the back door before anybody could find her inside. She was glad she had parked her bike around back and out of sight. She rolled it out onto the street and fired the engine almost at the same time as she sped away.  
She checked the time as she drove, and was surprised to see how much time had gone by; school was about to start. The choice was an easy one as Celaena made it to the intersection, and turned towards the hospital. She could be in and out in time to get to school by second period.

As she got to the room, she only half expected to find Lysandra there. Listening in and finding the room quiet, she walked in.

“Surprised to see you here,” Sam said as soon as she was past the threshold.

“We’ve got business, you and I,” she said in a low and somber tone as she stood right next to him.

“Did you find anything?” Sam was serious, clearly catching on the importance of the matter straight away.

“I might have,” she whispered as she crouched, getting her face at the same level as Sam’s. Before Sam could read her expression, she snapped a hand up and closed it around his throat. “Now, whose side are you on?” She hissed.

Sam didn’t even flinch, he kept eye contact for a moment and then blinked once, slowly. “I’m with you,” he said softly.

“Are you really? You and Arobynn had had some fishy business, and I don’t trust that he trusts you.”

Sam glanced to the door before replying. “I know you think I betrayed you, but I didn’t. I thought you were in trouble, and I was trying to help. If you tell me what’s going on, maybe I can prove it to you.”

Celaena pondered how much to say, she knew what her end game was, what she wanted to obtain by going to the hospital. And she realized then, that maybe there was a way Cortland could start proving his worth, by proving he’d be willing to help without knowing why.

“I need you to back down from the tournament,” she said, loosening her hold on Sam’s throat.

Sam’s golden eyes bore into Celaena’s as if trying to read the motives behind what she was asking for. “Done,” he replied after a minute, surprising Celaena so much that she let go of his neck altogether, and took a step back.

“And I need you to help me convince Arobynn that I’m the one to take your place.” Sam kept his expression cool as he nodded slowly.

“Do you know what you’re getting yourself into?” He asked her, a little line forming on his forehead.

“You, better than anybody, know that I do,” Celaena's tone had turned a little playful as the relief of getting what she needed started to wash over her. She just needed to convince Arobynn that she was his best option if he still wanted to win those bets. She could win that tournament, and find what her aunt’s involvement was while at it.

“I do,” Sam said with a half-smile. “Now, are you going to tell me why you need to be a part of the competition? I know you love fighting, but this is not the same as junior league, those guys can be brutal.”

“And I can be worse,” she replied without a second’s delay, making Sam chuckle again.

“I know that, you definitely have fire burning in that heart of yours,” he replied. “If you’re not telling me why, tell me how. What’s your plan? You can’t fight under the name of Celaena, if anybody traces your name back to Adarlan Elite, your whole plan could get ruined. And you certainly can’t fight under your real name.”

“I know that, I will find another alias, just a random name, maybe…” Celaena thought for a moment, trying to think of a name that sounded cool, but menacing at the same time, one that said ‘don’t mess with me’. “What about, Lillian?”

“Kind of sounds like Lilith, the vampire. I can see the resemblance,” Sam replied with a wink.

“You wanker,” Celaena laughed as she punched Sam in the shoulder, making him wince. When was the last time they had laughed together? Certainly, before he had betrayed her. Or, if he was telling the truth, when she _thought_ he did. She was still unsure about trusting Sam, but a part of her wished she could. Sam had been the closest thing to a friend she had ever had, and seeing him in the hospital like this had softened her heart if only a little.

“What about, Diana? Sounds kind of hot,” Sam offered.

“Sounds like an old lady.” Celaena scrunched her face and shook her head. Maybe she didn’t need a name, but a nickname. She could try to come up with something that represented her, something that meant something. Something that would make it worth fighting for, a name worth defending. Remembering Sam’s words from a moment ago, she started playing with words in her mind. Fire in your heart, he had said. Celaena could get on board with that, the anger and thirst for revenge almost burned like a fire in her chest most days. Heart of fire. Fire in the heart.

“Fireheart,” she said almost to herself. Sam looked at her, his honey eyes shining under the sun filtering through the window.

“Fireheart,” he repeated slowly, as if savoring the word. “I like it, it suits you.”


	11. Fighting is the easy part

Convincing Arobynn to allow her to be a part of the tournament didn’t end up being as hard as Celaena expected. Sam had had to stay in the hospital for an extra night after he coincidentally got a terrible migraine just before being dismissed, ending up with the doctors running a few extra tests in case there was any damage to his brain.

The results had come in clear by Wednesday morning, and Sam had been dismissed with a warning not to do any extenuating exercise. Arobynn would have been happy to send Sam to a fight on the same day, but the fact that he had missed a lot of his training and wasn’t in his best shape was what helped them convince him. Sam had sustained major bruising to his abdomen and was still wearing tight bandages to help ease the pain, as well as ingesting a whole lot of painkillers on the daily. There was also major bruising on his shoulder, but nothing was broken.

“How are you feeling today?” Celaena asked him Saturday afternoon as he watched her punch the boxing bag in the basement.

“So much better. My chest still looks like a work of art between the greens and purples, but the pain is tolerable. I’m used to worse,” he chuckled. They both were.

“Do you know who I’ll be fighting tonight?” Celaena asked as she started practicing her kicks.

“No, they won’t say a thing until you get there. Just…”

"Just what?” Celaena cut him. “Don’t you dare say 'just be careful'.” She glared at Sam, knowing that that was exactly what he was about to say, and he looked down, almost ashamed.

“That’s not the way I mean it, I know you can look after yourself, but don’t get cocky, those guys won’t like getting beaten up by a girl,” he said after a moment.

“So, you’re saying I’m going to beat them?” Celaena smiled as she stopped hitting the bag and walked towards Sam, grabbing a towel from the bench he was sitting on and wiping her forehead.

“I know for a fact you will."

Smiling to herself, Celaena headed up the stairs and made her way to her bedroom. After taking a shower and getting changed into her usual leggings, she headed back to the hotel. She was looking forward to a big nap to make sure she’ll be well-rested for the fight.

***

The tension in the atmosphere was palpable, and the air was so thick with testosterone that Celaena thought she could probably cut it with a knife. There were going to be ten different fights that night, each fighter having two battles to prove their worth. If she won both, she’ll be included in the tournament, which would officially start in two weeks. She wasn’t worried, she knew she’d win, she had to. She needed to be a part of the tournament to find out why her aunt’s name had been on the slips from Arobynn’s bets. Was Maeve the one behind the whole tournament? What other unlawful business was she involved in? Did this make her a more prone suspect in her parent’s deaths?

She was bouncing on the ball of her feet as the first fight was announced, and a bulky guy with a bald head moved out of the back room and into the arena, followed by another guy that couldn’t be more than 19 years old, and looked lean but too small in comparison.

Celaena stayed in the backroom, peeking at the raised fighting platform from behind the thick curtain that separated them from the audience. The place wasn’t too full, as the tournament hadn’t officially started. The only ones present were people known to the fighters and some of the bigger investors that were curious to see who they should root for. Arobynn was between them, and Celaena looked around half expecting to find her aunt Maeve there too, but there was no sign of her.

“Hey,” Sam called as he showed by her side. “Would you care to explain the mask?”

She didn’t look at him, but instinctively fixed the red mask she was wearing, making sure it was still tightly fitted around her cheeks. She knew she probably looked like a weirdo, but she wasn’t going to risk her aunt seeing her if she was around, so Celaena had decided on yet another disguise. She had tied her hair in a low bun and had made a red lace mask that concealed a few her factions. She had glued it to her skin so it wouldn't become an annoyance during the fight and was wearing her brown contacts as well as black eye shadow and liner.

“Don’t you laugh at it,” she finally said under her breath. To explain to Sam the mask, she’d have to tell him about her aunt, and even if they were on the best terms they’ve been in a long time, she still wasn’t sure if she could trust him with that kind of information.

“I wouldn’t, you look lethal.”

She turned around to face him, expecting to see him laughing; but Sam was serious. “You mean it?”

“Aelin,” he said in a whisper, her real name slipping out of his mouth for the first time in months. “I don’t know what else to do to be back on your good side, we were friends once, and I’m here to prove that you can trust me again.” Sam was dead serious, and the fact that he had used her real name, told Celaena that he wanted to make a point. He was one of the few that knew who she was: Aelin Ashryver, heir to the Ashryver Galathynius fortune. He had kept her secret for nine years, and what had she done in return? Be an ass and mistrust him at every chance she got. Maybe he was telling the truth, maybe he hadn’t betrayed her after all.

“Okay,” she simply said as she looked into Sam’s eyes; pondering. “Let’s say I give you one piece of information, can I trust it won’t make its way to Arobynn’s ears?”

Sam looked hurt as he took a step back, and Celaena thought he was offended by the insult until Sam spoke again.

“Don’t,” he said sadly. “Don’t tell me anything, there’s something you need to know,” he looked through the curtain to where Arobynn was sitting. “You need to know the real reason why he sent me to school before you decide to tell me anything.”

Celaena grabbed Sam by the elbow and dragged him to the back of the room as the crowd roared and they heard the host proclaim the winner of the fight. The next round of fighters was called onto the stage as they reached the back wall.

“What are you talking about?” She asked him once they were far away from everybody else.

“He sent me over to spy on you,” he spat, as if repulsed by the idea. “He wanted me to keep an eye on you and had me promise I would tell him everything you got up to. Who you were hanging out with, places you were going.”

“And did you do it?” Celaena asked.

“I had to,” he replied, keeping his eyes on hers.

“What does he have on you?” She knew that if Arobynn could get Sam to do something like that, it was because he had some kind of leverage.

“He threatened to repeat what happened that night,” he said in a low whisper. Celaena shuddered, the memories bringing a sour taste to her mouth. She didn’t need to ask any more questions, she knew what was at stake, and she wasn’t going to risk telling Sam anything that might put him in that kind of danger.

“It’s okay, Sam." She rested a hand on his shoulder and nodded once.

“It almost sounds like you’re forgiving me,” he said hopefully.

“Don’t be too cocky,” she punched him lightly, making him laugh again. She had forgotten what it was like to get along with Sam. There had been a short time when they had been great friends, and it had been refreshing to have someone to joke around with.

“Fireheart and Verin, you’re next,” someone called from the door, and Celaena turned around and walked towards the curtains with Sam following a few steps behind.

Her opponent didn’t look like much, he was slinky and looked more like a homeless person than a fighter. Celaena knew the fight would be over before it’d even start.

Her rival was already walking away with one of the staff members, as the other security guy waited for her, looking impatient.

“You, with me,” he said as she got close enough. He had a tall and broad complexion like all the rest of the men on the security team, but Celaena thought there was something different about it. There was something in his pine green eyes that looked more like sorrow rather than contained anger. Celaena was used to dealing with his type, always acting before thinking, mere puppets following the owner’s orders. She knew not to mess with them, as they were the ones that would beat the crap out of you and ditch you in an alley if you ever crossed their masters.

Once they got to the side of the platform, the guy pushed her forward with a hand against her lower back, making her flinch at the contact. She quickly jumped onto the stage, eager to get away from the feeling of his hand only a thin fabric away from her scarred skin.

She had decided to wear one of her long-sleeved catsuits so she would avoid as many points of contact as possible from where she could be grabbed and pulled. After all, she wasn’t like those guys that could fight in a pair of shorts. Even if that would’ve been an interesting show.

She stood in her corner, waiting for the judge to announce the start of the fight. Her opponent was shifting his weight from one foot to the other, and Celaena thought he looked like he was high on drugs. He wasn’t even a real opponent, and she was pissed off at the humiliation. Had they done it on purpose thinking she couldn’t fight because she was a woman?  
She would show them what she was capable of.

“Okay, you know the rules, no deadly hits, you fall off the platform, you’re out. Now, fight!” The judge roared. The crowd cheered briefly, and then went silent as Verin stepped forward.

She jumped on the spot twice, making sure her ankles were warmed up properly, and rolled her neck as Verin took another step towards her. She took two steps on light feet, barely touching the floor, and before her opponent could take a swing at her, she lifted her leg and lowered her trunk as her foot collided against Verin’s face, sending him tumbling down to the floor. She landed with her hands on the floor and did a half cartwheel to get back up, facing her opponent again. When she saw he was still lying on the floor, motionless, Celaena relaxed her posture. Too fucking easy.

With a bored expression on her face, she crossed her arms over her chest. The crowd was unusually quiet as the judge spoke.

“Uhm, I… I think that’s a win for Fireheart,” he said, not sounding convinced. The guard that had brought Verin to the platform jumped up and checked the guy's pulse, quickly nodding to the judge and then slapping the fighter a few times to wake him up.

She jumped down as Verin was taken away, the other security guard waiting for her by the side of the platform. She started walking towards the resting area in the back, the guy following suit by her side.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” the guy muttered, almost as if unwilling to share that information.

“What do you mean?” She snapped, looking at him.  
The man ran a hand through his long white hair, and then fixed his low pony. Just before they reached the curtain, he spoke again in a low and hushed tone.

“Just be careful, and watch your back.”

She didn’t have time to reply, as before she could react, he had gone ahead of her and entered the back area to look for the next fighter. Why did men always have to tell her to be careful? Celaena knew how to look after herself. And what had he meant? What was she not supposed to do? Win? Watch your back. Was that a threat? That guy certainly didn't know a thing about her.

Celaena huffed in annoyance as she walked towards her bag looking for her bottle of water. She watched the white-haired dude walking out with the next fighter, and shook her head. Most of the time, she thought men were the strangest beings she had to deal with. And that guy had certainly won some bonus points already.


	12. Reliving memories

Celeana’s turn came back around in no time, and she was beaming for it. It was the last encounter of the night, and after such a short and boring first fight, she was eager to throw some punches and have some real competition.

Her opponent was the bulky bald man from the first match of the evening, and the same guard came over to get her.

“What did you mean before?” She asked him as they walked towards the platform. She had managed to cool her anger, and she was now mostly curious about what the guy had said.

He glanced at her through the corner of his eye, and then looked up to the audience, not answering her question. Celaena followed his gaze and was surprised to find a figure sitting in a dark corner, barely visible against the lights that were shining in front of her. From the curves of the body, she could tell it was a woman, but she couldn’t see her face. There were two more security guards propped close to her, and Celaena couldn’t help but wonder if that was her aunt. It had to be, right?

As she stepped onto the platform, she looked to the corner again, trying to see any further details, but the lights were right on her eyes, and she couldn’t make up more than a silhouette. There was no doubt the woman had positioned herself right under the headlights on purpose, trying to be inconspicuous.

“You know the rules,” the judge repeated. “Now, fight, make it fun,” he finished.

Only a second later, her opponent was already on her, throwing a punch aimed straight at her face. She ducked under his arm and took a step to the side. He turned to face her again with another punch aimed at her jaw. He was too slow. She ducked, took a step to the side, and punched him on the pit of the stomach. He took a step back and charged again. He was slow, but he was solid, and she knew her punches wouldn’t do much damage.

As he tried to take another jab with his right, she crouched and rolled to the left. She was on her feet in the blink of an eye, jumping on the guy's exposed back and trapping him in a headlock. His biceps were so big, that he struggled to try and get a grip on her. His arms flew around trying to catch onto something fruitlessly while Celaena kept squeezing.

The guy reached back and managed to grab her ankle, squeezing tight with one hand as he tried to reach her with the other too. She felt her ankle heat up, and pain wrapped around her leg. Her right arm was throbbing at the effort of being wrapped around the guy's thick neck, but she didn’t let go, she squeezed tighter, ignoring the pain in her ankle. She knew how much damage that guy could do if he got another hand on her.

After a minute that felt like an eternity, her bicep almost cramping at the effort, her opponent finally stopped fighting her and dropped to his knees. She stood behind him, pushing the weight onto one leg, and released the lock slowly when his head lolled to one side. He slumped with a loud thump that resonated in the silent room. Once again, the crowd was mostly silent as the judge proclaimed her the winner.

She jumped down and walked towards the back, making sure not to show how much pain she was in. The guard was stepping on her heels, silent for the first few steps.

“What do you think you’re doing?” he hissed behind her.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, mate,” she hissed back over her shoulder. The guy flinched, and shook his head, as if annoyed.

“I’m not your fucking mate,” he said under his breath.

His green eyes were still digging a hole into her soul as she stepped into the back room. She watched him quickly walk away and trailed his steps as he made his way to the lady in the shadows. He nodded a few times, then shook his head and walked away from the woman. Celaena wasn’t sure why she kept looking at him, but there was something intriguing about the guy and the way he seemed to be trying to warn her about something. There was something in his eyes that didn’t match the place, like he didn’t belong. And maybe that’s what got her attention, because Celaena knew a whole lot about not belonging.

She sat down and rolled her ankle slowly. It wasn't broken, she could work with that. She picked her bag up and headed towards the back door, where Sam was already waiting for her.

***

Sunday came and went in the blink of an eye as Celaena used half the day to exercise, and the other half to sleep, rest, and ice her swollen ankle. Arobynn had had Sam doing a few jobs in the past few days but had told Celaena he wanted all her energy focused on the tournament, which was why she wouldn’t have any extra assignments until that was over. No assignments meant no pocket money from the percentage she always got for the jobs, but it also meant more time to investigate her parent’s deaths.

She was finally set on a plan to infiltrate Dorian’s penthouse on the 25th floor on Monday night.

When morning broke, she was already eager to come back from school and get it done. Her ankle wasn't as sore, and she could walk normally if she made an effort. She didn't think anybody would notice her slight limp and was confident the painkillers would make the pain completely disappear soon enough.

The morning seemed to go by too slowly as Celaena just wanted to head back to the hotel.

“Hey there,” Nehemia greeted her as she joined her in their usual spot in the cafeteria at lunchtime. Celaena had socialized with the cheerleaders during practices but was still unsure about joining them during lunch.  
Even if it wasn’t the best for her plans, she had to admit she enjoyed spending that time with Nehemia rather than with the bees; and she would have felt guilty leaving her alone.

“How’s it going?” She asked as she watched Nehemia plummet onto the seat.

“I have an assignment due Wednesday that’s driving me crazy,” the dark-haired girl played with one of the rings on her dreads as she spoke.

“What is it about? Maybe I could give you a hand,” Celaena replied before thinking about it.

“Could you?” Nahemia turned to face her and grabbed her from the shoulders, shaking her lightly. “Please, please, could you?”

“Chill down, I can.” Nehemia let go of her and analyzed her features.

“Did something happen this weekend? You’re being nice, offering help and there’s some kind of… glow in your eyes.” Celaena blinked, scared that her contacts might have shifted. “Did you meet someone this weekend? Did you go on a date?” Nehemia asked excitedly, making Celaena’s worries wash away.

“No, I didn’t.” She took a bite of her pizza as she laughed to herself. Meet someone? She had met a couple of guys and had beaten them both unconscious if that counted. She almost choked on the pizza at the thought of using that as her answer.

“Why are you lying to me? You did meet someone, didn’t you? What is he like? Does he come to Adarlan Elite?”

“Enough, I didn’t meet anybody, come on, I got the next period free and so do you, so let’s head to the library and start with that project of yours.” Celaena stood up, taking the last bite of her pizza and walking away as she ate her pudding on the go.

Nehemia rushed behind her, a slice of pizza in each hand.

“The library? That’s for the lame kids,” Nehemia pouted, and Celaena stopped on her tracks, turning around to fully face her friend.

“Excuse me? I thought you were better than that.” She said, suddenly feeling hurt. “Libraries are full of books and ideas, which are perhaps the most dangerous and powerful of all weapons, you know.”

“I’m sorry,” Nehemia was quick to reply and lift her hands in apology, “I didn’t mean to upset you. And you’re right, it was a stupid comment to make. It’s just that… don’t worry. It’s nothing, and I apologize again.” She said as they started walking towards the library again.

“It’s okay, I accept your apology." Nehemia was looking down, her usual cheerfulness gone. “We all make mistakes,” Celaena added as she rested a hand on the other girl’s shoulder.

Looking up at her, Nehemia smiled again. “Thanks.”  
The library was almost empty, as usual. Celaena thought it was such a shame that kids in the school weren’t enjoying this marvelous and astonishing library. There were so many books piled up on shelves that were as high as the ceiling. She would’ve needed at least ten lifetimes to go through the entire collection.

The two girls walked to the back of the room, where a few low round tables lay surrounded by couches. They dropped onto the cushions and got their notebooks and pens out.

“Okay, what’s the subject?” Celaena asked.

“Biology, I really do suck at it.”

Celaena stretched forward and grabbed the essay that Nehemia had started writing. She had a fair idea of what they needed to write about, but there were a few details she was going to need help with.

“Okay, there’s one book I want to go look for. Wait here, I’ll be back in a minute.”

Celaena disappeared between the shelves, running her fingers through the oldest book’s spines and reading titles as she went. She knew she wasn’t even close to the section she needed to head to for the biology book, but she’d been meaning to go to the library for weeks. She had been in during the night a few times, but it was the first time she was watching the place in the light of the day. The yellow sunbeams were dancing in the air and giving the whole place a golden glow, making it seem almost magical.

She picked a hardcover book and pulled it out. There was a white circle on the black front cover, with a geometrical representation of mountains, and three little stars on top. She ran a finger through the spine and read the name again. A court of mist and fury. Looking at the back cover, she read the words out loud.

“Good. I was not good. I was nothing, and my soul, my eternal soul, was damned…” She could relate to that.

She was about to keep reading when someone showed up in the hall. The short girl walked her way and looked at the book she was holding.

“Have you already read it? I absolutely love that saga!”

“Oh, is it a saga?” Celeana hadn't realized that before.

“It is, that’s the second book, the first one should be here…” the girl stood on her tiptoes, looking at the shelf and then grunting. “I hate people that don’t leave the books where they belong. Don’t worry, it will probably be back there tomorrow if you come looking for it, books don’t stay lost for long here.” The girl smiled shyly, and Celaena thought there was something familiar about her light brown eyes and the way she carried herself.

“That’s okay, I was meant to be looking for a biology book anyways, I got sidetracked.”

“I know that feeling all too well, we are so incredibly lucky that Adarlan Elite has a fiction section in the library. It only took me a few years of pleading to the student’s council,” she finished with a bigger and more confident smile.

“That’s great,” she replied as she put the book back on the shelf, ready to keep going.

“By the way, I don’t think we’ve been introduced,” the short girl extended a hand towards her. “I’m Elide Lochan.”

Concentrating not to flinch at the memories, Celaena stretched her hand and shook the girl’s one quickly. “Nice to meet you, I’m Celaena.”

“I’m so happy to see there’s another bookworm in school, maybe we should hang out sometime, you could maybe join the book club if you want, we're starting a read-along of 'a court of thorns and roses' next month, which is the first book of the saga,” Elide added, her cheeks blushing slightly when she finished talking.

“Yeah, I’ll look into it, thanks.” She turned around and backed through the hall, turning into the first corner and moving away as fast as she could.

Before she could process her actions, she was out of the library and locked inside a cubicle in the closest bathroom. Lowering the seat, she sat down and rested her head on her palms. How come she had missed her name on the database? She had been so stupid. She had only looked at the database for seniors, and Elide had to be a junior. Celaena had always thought Elide was still living in Terrasen and had never given any second thought to her or her mother.

She let herself get lost in the memories, remembering the way Marion Lorchan used to look after her when her parents were away on business trips. How she and Elide have played together as little kids, braided each other's hairs, and slept among a thousand pillows during sleepovers. Evalin Ashryver and Marion Lochan had been close friends since they were little girls, and both of them had always dreamed their daughters would grow to be as close as they were.

Thinking about it, Celaena wasn’t surprised that Marion would’ve decided to move away when Evalin passed away, she had had to be one of the most affected people by the tragedy.

Taking a deep breath, she came out of the cubicle and headed back to the library, where she found the book as fast as possible and reunited with Nehemia by the couches. She’d look through the whole database that night after getting into the penthouse. She wouldn’t be caught off guard again.

“What took you so long?” Nehemia asked, barely lifting her head from the essay she was trying to write.

“Sorry, got sidetracked,” she said as she plummeted on her seat. “Let’s finish that essay and get out of here.”


	13. Cheering with the squad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Just wanted to thank you all for all the kudos and kind messages, they do mean so much! Special thanks to Lissa for always being there to give some love to each and every chapter 💕  
> I love reading everybody's theories and might admit, some of them are already influencing little plot twists here and there!

"I can’t believe it’s October already! Where has the first month of classes gone?” Thea said happily as Kaya lifted her onto her shoulders.

“Girls, concentrate, we can talk after practice is over,” Lysandra’s voice rose over the sound of the music. “We have 3 months until the season starts, and I want this year to be the best!”

Thea and Kaya stopped talking and concentrated as the whole team kept practicing some shapes. Celaena didn't know why she found herself drawn to the two girls, as she often watched how easily they got along despite seeming so opposite to each other.

She had ended up joining the team as a base, trying not to call too much attention to herself. She was paired up with Ansel at the moment, who was always beaming with energy and trying to make up conversation.

“That cute guy is looking at us from the bleachers,” Ansel interrupted as they all lined up to rehearse some dance moves twenty minutes later.

Celaena looked up and noticed Sam sitting on his own, casually flipping over a magazine as he watched them practice. When their eyes met, he smirked, and she almost wanted to laugh. He would tease her about this until the end of their days, she knew it. Not because she was a bad cheerleader, but because she had always teased the kind of girls that got up to such things.

The girls she was training with had proved to be so different from her initial impressions, and she had come to even like some of them; especially Ansel. The fire-haired girl was fierce and funny, and Celaena could see how they would've been good friends under different circumstances.

“Who is he here for?” Ansel asked the group as she lifted her brows playfully. Lysandra turned around to look at the bleachers, and Celaena watched as Sam’s smile widened.

“Sam! Stop distracting the crew!” Lysandra yelled loud enough for him to hear. Sam lifted his hands in apology and turned around to keep reading the magazine with his back to the field. “Perfect, now bees, let’s get back into it! In five, six, seven, eight!”

As the beat dropped, Celaena instinctively pulled her light sweater down before she started to follow Lysandra’s lead. They practiced the same routine five times before the training concluded for the day, and everybody started to stretch on their own. Sam made his way down the bleachers slowly and approached the field.

The jocks were on the other paddock yelling loudly and bumping chests as they did every time they had a good training session. For such a small school, Celaena was still surprised they had two fields, but she guessed it was a way of showing off how much money they had.

“Hey Lys, how did it go?” Sam asked as he got next to the queen bee and casually handed her a bottle of strawberry flavored water that he took out of his bag.

"Would’ve been better if you weren’t there distracting my girls.” She pushed him lightly in the shoulder, and Sam staggered back, feigning pain.

“Ow, that still hurts!”

“I’m so sorry! I forgot about the shoulder!” Lysandra raised her hands to her mouth, her eyes widening slightly in surprise. If she had known Sam for longer, she would have noticed the way his eyes diverted to the side, like every time he was lying.

A second later, Sam was laughing, and Lysandra was punching him again, this time a bit harder. His shoulder had fully healed a week ago, and his bruising had finally disappeared. He was back to looking like his usual cheerful self; not like he had ever stopped being his painfully cheerful self.

Celaena huffed and got up from the ground, her stretching all done. She was about to head back to the locker room when she spotted Aedion coming their way, and her curiosity won the battle. She stood close enough to Sam and Lys, stretching her quads again by bringing her heel to her glute.

“Hey there, gorgeous,” Aedion reached Lysandra and wrapped an arm around her.

“Aw, you’re so sweaty!” She squirmed, making Aedion hold her even tighter.

“Hey Sam, what are you doing around here?” Aedion asked once he stopped wrestling with his girlfriend.

“I had some spare time between classes and thought I’d pop and say hi. Also, I wanted to bring this magazine to Lys,” he added as he passed it over.

Celaena moved to stretch her calves, trying to stick around to hear where the conversation was going. She was surprised to see the three of them seemed to be pretty close.

“Oh my God! You found it!” The queen bee squealed happily as she let go of Aedion and wrapped her arms around Sam’s neck, still holding the magazine in one hand.

Aedion cleared his throat loudly, and Sam and Lysandra let go of each other and looked at him, big smiles still plastered on their faces. “You know, I’m still here,” Adion said in a stern voice, crossing his arms over his chest.

To Celaena’s surprise, both Sam and Lysandra laughed out loud at his words, and as both team captains hugged each other again, Sam stood there, a huge smile on his face.

“Sorry, you know how it is,” Sam said after a moment, shrugging with one shoulder. Aedion let go of Lysandra, and they stood side by side, arms around each other’s waists, and Lysandra’s head resting on Aedion’s shoulder.

“If I didn’t fully trust my girlfriend, I would think you are trying to steal her from me, Cortland.” Aedion still sounded stern, but playful at the same time.

“I would never dare,” Sam replied, making Celaena wonder what kind of game was going on between those three. Sam was shifting his weight from one foot to the other, making her even more confused. She was sure he hadn’t lied, but he still seemed oddly nervous.  
Celaena got an idea then and realized that was as good of a time to interrupt as any, so she casually strolled the few steps towards the group.

“Hey, Lys,” she said with her biggest smile, slipping into the cool popular kid vibe in a second. “About that team meeting on Saturday... What time is that going to be again?”

“My house, at eight,” Lysandra replied, her arm still wrapped around Aedion’s waist.

“What are you meeting for?” Sam interrupted, seeming genuinely curious.

“Halloween planning, the bees are on the committee organizing a party,” Lysandra looked at Celaena with a frown. “Let me guess, you're bailing on us. You bailed on our squad tea party two weeks ago too!" She pouted dramatically, making Celaena want to roll her eyes. In the past two weeks of training with the squad, she had learned to tolerate Lysandra, but the captain could still be so insistent and annoying sometimes.

"So sorry, Lys, I have some family coming over to visit, I promised I'd make time for them," Celaena lied, knowing that she needed a plausible excuse to bail again. She could be there for a while before the fight, but she preferred to have that time to warm up and practice. She wanted to make sure she had her head on the game for the first official night of the tournament.

Lysandra let go of Aedion and crossed her arms over her chest, looking like a little girl throwing a tantrum while Aedion moved his arm over to her shoulders, casually rubbing little circles with his thumb. She opened her mouth as if to complain, but then turned around to face Sam with a grin. "Why don't you join instead? You have really good taste, and you managed to find me a copy of that design magazine I couldn't find anywhere! You could be a helpful asset planning this party! You certainly look more fun than Celaena here," she joked as she looked at Sam with pleading eyes.

"Sorry, I…" Sam stammered.

"That's such a good idea, Sam can replace me!"  
Celaena plastered a huge smile on her face as she threw a knowing glance at Sam.

She hadn't found anything helpful after watching the cameras she had put in Dorian's penthouse, so she thought Sam getting close to Lysandra would lead to him getting close to Aedion too. Maybe they could find some leads there.

"Actually," Celaena added, "maybe Aedion should go too, so you have a better masculine perspective and Sam doesn't feel out of place." Aedion looked at her, almost seeming surprised that she was directly talking to him, or at least about him. In all her time in the squad, she had tried to keep her distance from her cousin.

"That sounds like such a good idea!" Lysandra beamed as she hooked an arm around each of the boys' waists, tugging them closer to her.

Celaena knew Sam would scold her for not allowing him to be there for the tournament, but she didn't care. She was almost starting to trust Sam, and it’d be better if they split up and covered more ground. And she didn’t want Sam knowing her aunt might be involved in the fights, not until she had more information about it, not until she was sure if Sam was fully on her side or not.

***

When Celaena heard the front door, she stilled and waited patiently but on alert. She slid a hand under the pillow, holding the handle of the knife she kept there for emergencies, while she uncrossed her legs slowly. Even if she was convinced she knew who it was, she was always ready for a fight.

“Hey there,” Sam said as he got to her room, and Celaena let go of the knife, crossing her arms over her chest.

“You need to stop sneaking in like you live here.”

“Oh, you know, we’ve lived together for so long, I almost feel like this is my place too. And I kind of like it here, it’s cozy and fancy at the same time.” Sam walked towards the bed where she was laying and plummeted down, his arms crossed behind his head.

“But it’s not your place.” Celaena closed her laptop and stood up, looking down at Sam, with a scowl.

Sam pointed to the computer with a nod of his head. “Nothing new going on in the penthouse, I assume?”

“Nothing ever happens up there, I’m starting to believe Dorian Sr. might be clean, he’s so boring and predictable.” Celaena stretched her arms and headed over to her dresser.

“Are you ready for today’s fight?”

“As ready as can be,” she yelled back from inside the dresser, throwing her black catsuit on the bed and coming out with her favorite lace-up fighting boots.  
Sam looked at her for a moment, as if debating whether to ask a question or not. “Spit it,” she said as she stood in front of him, arms crossed again. Their relationship had gone back to almost being a friendship as it had been before the incident, and Celaena still found it weird that she felt so comfortable around him. Sam was back to his easy going self, playing jokes on her and smiling that annoying confident smile of his.

“Why did you not want me there? Arobynn will have my head for not being at the fights to report back to him if he ever finds out, which I hope he doesn’t. I’ve never been happier about him being out of town.”

“It’s not that I don’t want you there, is that I rather have you close to Aedion. If you’re gonna be involved, you might as well be helpful.” She was considering infiltrating her uncle’s office, but Sam didn’t need to know that. “Now, off you go, go plan that party, I need to get ready to head over to that dungeon.” She dismissed Sam with a shake of her wrist and started getting changed.

Sam smiled widely at her before walking out, clearly content with the fact that she was letting him be a part of the game again.

Celaena always took her time to get ready, both physically and mentally. Doing her makeup for the fight was almost like a ritual that helped her get into the right mind frame.

When she walked through the shady alley later that night, she was feeling confident and was buzzing with positivity, ready for a fight. She clenched and unclenched her fists as she got to the metal door at the dead end, and knocked three times.

Her smug smile dropped as the door opened up, and she found herself facing not the usual bulky black doorman, but none other than her guard from the first round of fights.

“We meet again,” Celaena said casually as he moved to the side and she walked past him.

“So it seems,” he replied nonchalantly, following her in. “You’re pretty early, you’re the first one in.”

Surprised about the chit chat, she turned around to face him at the threshold of the back room, propping an arm over the door frame.

“So, you’ve been working here for long, mate?” She used her sweet tone, the one reserved for information seeking, and battered her lashes as she smiled and waited for a response.

“That is none of your business,” he said nonchalantly, crossing his muscled arms over his chest. “And stop calling me that, I’m not your fucking mate.”

“What should I call you, then? I don’t even know your name.” Celaena didn’t know why she was so intended in getting closer to this guy, but she told herself he could have valuable knowledge. He had seemed to know the lady in the shadows, and any information she could get would be useful. She was starting to get frustrated about the lack of information she had collected, so it was probably time to begin playing some new games.

“That is none of your business either, are you always such a busybody?”

There was a cress between his brows that made him look older. He didn’t look that much older than her, maybe only a few years, but there was something in his expression that made him look almost ancient. Like he was carrying a huge weight on his back. Celaena ran her eyes down his broad shoulders, and she got lost for a moment staring at his tattooed arm. He had a full sleeve of black inked lines that seemed to dance across his muscles, and disappeared under the sleeve of his top. The lines continued up to his neck, tracing his jawline and getting lost behind his ear. When she made her way back to his eyes, they were still fixed on her face, his expression serious, and Celaena mindlessly fixed the laced mask before clearing her throat.

“I guess I might be, I’m just naturally curious,” she replied finally. “I’ve been rude, I apologize,” she extended her arm forward. “You can call me Fireheart,” she said, waiting for him to give his name in response.

The guard’s arms stayed crossed over his chest as he looked at her outstretched hand, and he breathed out loudly. “I know who you are, Fireheart,” he spat her nickname as if it was an insult, and Celaena dropped her arm as well as her smile.

He turned around and walked three steps before stopping on his tracks, and looking over his shoulder. There was doubt in his expression when his lips parted.

“I’m Rowan,” he said almost between his teeth, and then he was gone.

Celaena turned around with a grunt and dropped her bag loudly over one of the wooden benches as she shook her head. “Rowan,” she hissed. “He looked more like an asshole to me.”


	14. Getting heated up

The backroom filled up fast, and within half an hour, all the fighters were warming up, jumping over on the spot and throwing punches in the air. The noise outside was also picking up, and Celaena could feel the rambling energy in the air from all the customers getting louder and louder. She was jumping on the spot, almost dancing as one of her favorite songs was playing in her head. The adrenaline was pumping in her veins, and she could feel her lips trying to pull up into a smile, but she remained dead serious as she waited for the first fight to be called. She was keeping to herself on the farthest corner while she eavesdropped on the other fighter’s conversations in case she found any useful information about her aunt or the running of the fights.

She hadn’t seen Maeve since before the plane crash, but she still remembered her clearly. Her father’s sister had had his same dark eyes, and his dark hair, but she had dyed it raven black so long ago that Celaena could barely remember if her natural hair really looked like her father’s. Maeve had always treated her right and used to spend a lot of time around their house, coming over with presents for young Aelin or visiting for lunch on the weekends. According to the information she had gathered through the years, her aunt was still single and had never had kids, and still lived in Terrasen. She remembered how Maeve and Rhoe, Aelin’s father, used to spend a lot of time in her father’s office discussing work, and she used to peek through the window and try to hear what the adults were talking about.

“I’ll feel bad for whoever needs to fight her,” a slinky blond guy said only a few feet away, bringing Celaena back to the present.

“What do they think this is, allowing a girl here?” Another one growled.

Celaena balled her fists by her side and took a deep breath through her nose.

“And what’s up with that stupid mask?” The first one added, a little louder this time.

“I could break her in two with my bare hands,” the tallest guy smirked, looking straight at her.

Celaena took a step forward, and she could see the tall dark-haired security guard through the corner of her eye, talking into his radio as she did.

“Say that to my face if you’re so fucking brave.” She looked up at the guy who towered a head over her. He was huge, with bulky round shoulders and eyes as dark as the night.

“I could break you in two with my bare hands,” he repeated as he took a menacing step and looked down at her. Celaena’s upper lip lifted up as she ground her teeth and her balled fists started rising slowly.

“I would like to see that,” she spat back.

“Enough of that you two. Everybody, fuck off and get ready to fight, we’re starting in five,” a new voice said as a guy walked into the room, a smug smile on his face. He gestured with his hands for them to break apart, but no one moved.

The tall guy kept his eyes on Celaena and leaned down. “Remember my face, sweetheart,” he whispered in her ear before straightening back up.

“Cain, I said fuck off,” the blond security guard pushed the tall guy with a hand against his chest. Cain huffed and turned around to leave. “You all good, girl?” The guard turned towards her, his dark eyes fixed on her.

“Fine,” she hissed. “I didn’t need your fucking help.” She crossed her arms over her chest and uncrossed them again as she realized she must look like a childish teen throwing a tantrum.

“Can tell you don’t, just doing my job.” He raised his palms and smiled broadly at her. “By the way, I’m Fenrys, nice to officially meet you.” He stretched a hand towards her, and Celaena shook it begrudgingly.

“Fireheart,” she muttered in an exhale.

“That one over there,” Fenrys said as he pointed to the dark-haired guard that was still over by the door. “Is my asshole brother Connall. He’s an alright dude once you get to know him. And the grumpy ass by the corner,” he said as he pointed at Rowan, who was now in the corner of the room, looking at her with squinted eyes and his lips pressed into a tight line. “Is one of my best mates, Rowan.” He leaned closer to her, lowering his voice. “Don’t let his looks fool you, he’s as soft as a puppy deep down.” He winked at her and stepped back, leaving Celaena confused as to why this guy was being so friendly. The security team was normally known for being a bunch of self-righteous assholes that didn’t care about anybody.

“I’m here to kick ass, not to make friends.” She turned around and walked back over to her gym bag as she heard Fenrys chuckle behind her.

She pulled out her hand wraps and put them on slowly, savoring the moment her fists would collide against skin. She still didn’t know who she’d be fighting against, but she was hoping it’d be Cain. Whoever it was, she’d win. She’d win, and they could all go to Hell.

***

“Fireheart,” Rowan called from the door.

All the other fights had already taken place, and it was finally Celaena’s turn. She walked towards the white-haired guy, her fists already balled by her sides, and her chin held high.

“Xavier,” Connall walked in from the other side, and the blond guy that had teased Celaena earlier walked out, flashing her with a cocky grin before he did. He was tall and slinky, with the dullest brown eyes ever seen on the planet, but there was something in his expression that told Celaena not to be too quick to judge him. He looked like an absolute prick, and like someone that would stab his best mate in the back for a handful of coins.

She walked out of the backroom and headed towards her side of the platform, the place now looking smaller with the big crowd gathered around them. As soon as she stepped out, the crowd went wild, some cheering and howling while others booed and hissed.

“That girl looks like a joke!” Someone yelled to Celaena’s right.

“Give us a real fight!”

“Too much clothing!”

“Show us what you’ve got under there, babe!”

She kept her chin held high and thanked the world for the fact that neither Sam nor Arobynn were there to hear the crowd. She’d show them what she had under, what she had inside. She’d give them fire, ash, and blood. Her own blood was boiling by the time she reached the platform, only barely aware of Rowan’s hand resting against her lower back as she made her way up the stage. She thought she heard him say something, but his words were lost in the roaring of the crowd.

The command couldn't have come fast enough: “You know the rules. No deadly hits, if you fall, you lose. Now fight!”

Celaena moved to the middle of the platform as soon as the words left the judge’s lips, her fists still balled and her muscles aching to get put to use. Xavier met her in the middle, and before he could swing, Celaena went against her usual defensive stance and threw the first punch.

She got a hook straight to Xavier’s jaw before he could even react, and quickly took two steps back, staying out of his way. He moved forward, following her as expected. She crouched, swung her leg behind his, and stepped to the side as she watched Xavier’s body plummet down to the floor. He rolled awkwardly to the side as he got up, and Celaena couldn’t help the laugh that escaped her lips.

“You fucking bitch,” Xavier growled between his teeth, the sound barely reaching Celaena over the crowd.

“You’re going to eat your words,” she retorted. She was making him look like a fool, and she was loving it. She was quick, and she knew that was her best advantage. That, and the fact that guys always underestimated how hard she could punch.

“You’re going to regret this,” he hissed.

He almost ran towards her, and she sidestepped in the last second. He stopped an inch off the edge and turned around. He took two steps forward, she took two back. He took a jab at her ribs, and she let him graze her skin, staying close enough to punch him on the jaw again. He staggered back, she pushed forward. She kicked his side, and this time, he was expecting it. He grabbed her leg and pulled up. Before her body could touch the ground, she laced an arm around his calf, making him fall with her. She flipped, getting on top of him, and landed two punches to either side of his face before getting back up and moving back a few steps.

She was enjoying herself too much to make it quick. She wanted him to see that she could toy with him as much as she wanted, that she was the one in control. Xavier got up slowly, a murderous look on his face as a little glint of light flashed in his ring finger. Celaena went for a jab to his ribs and stepped back, but not before Xavier tried to go for her stomach, barely touching her over the hip instead as she moved to the side. Pain flared on her side as if a fire was burning in her insides. Her brain sent a rush of adrenaline, and she stepped forwards, taking three quick jabs at his kidney. She needed it to be over, and fast. She punched and kicked as fast as her limbs could move, watching carefully as Xavier took one step back after the other, oblivious of the edge.

The moment he looked to the side, recognition flashing on his face, she kicked him in the chest with all her strength, and he tumbled back, falling off the platform and granting her the needed win.

“Fireheart wins,” the judge said in a loud voice, and the crowd roared.

She pressed a hand against her side as she solemnly vowed to the crowd, and she felt the stickiness in her catsuit’s fabric. She jumped off the platform as fast as possible, barely aware of the shadow following behind her. She reached the back room, grabbed her gym bag off the bench, and shouldered it, her right hand still pressed hard against her side.

“Running away, princess?" Cain’s stinky breath swirled around her as she turned around to face him.

“I’m not running, but I got places to be.” She tried to keep her expression cool, her stance sure.

“Oh, the little girl’s got a curfew.” All the other fighters behind him booed and laughed, and Celaena turned on them, heading to the back door.

“Cain, I’m not telling you to fuck off again,” Fenrys moved from his spot on the wall and trailed after Celaena. “Are you okay, Fireheart?” He lowered his voice as she reached the door and stepped out into the back alley. “You look a bit pale.”

Celaena didn’t turn or reply, she walked towards the main street, her hand soaked in blood that was already dripping down her fingers. Her motorbike was parked five blocks away for security measures, and she wished she hadn’t been so careful. One block in, and she had to lean against a brick wall to catch her breath. The streets were deserted and dark in the moonless night, and she was back to being a mere shadow lurking the city.

“I’ve been through worse, it’s just a fucking cut,” she grumbled as she straightened up as much as she could. The memory of blood was taking over though, and her mouth felt dry, her throat closing up on her. “It’s nothing like it,” she whispered, reassuring herself. She looked down at her bloody hand, and carefully unstuck the fabric from the wound. Blood was still rushing out of the gash, and Celaena cursed Xavier in every language she knew.

“That mother fucking cheating scum!”

She heard voices, and looked behind her shoulder, noticing the crowd that started to spill out of the alley. Her feet moved out of their own accord, and she rushed to the next alley over. Why Rifthold had so many alleys was something that she couldn’t comprehend, why couldn’t streets just keep on going and be fucking connected?

She needed to do something about the wound, or she’d bleed out before she managed to get back to Arobynn’s mansion. Considering the amount of blood lost so far, the blade had to be laced with some kind of poison or anticoagulant, which would also explain the burning sensation on her side. She dropped her bag on the floor in the shadows of the alley and took out a bottle of water. Sitting on the floor, Celaena washed the wound as fast as she could and used the spare hand wraps to bandage her middle as tight as she could. That would do, for the time being, she had to get out of there, get to her motorbike, and go to Arobynn’s to get stitches.

“Funny to find you here, little bunny.” Celaena stood so fast, that her head spun. Right at the end of the alley, was Cain. His arms were folded across his torso, and Xavier was standing a step behind him to one side. “You don’t look so sure of yourself now that you have no protectors, do you?”

“I don’t need anybody to protect me.” She stood straight, ignoring the burning on her side, and lifting her fists up.

Both men walked towards her, smug smiles tugging at their lips, and Celaena threw the first punch, not ready to go down without the fight of her life.

She hit Cain on the chest and turned to kick Xavier in the ribs knowing he’d still be sore there. As Xavier staggered back, Cain pushed forward, and Celaena’s back hit the wall behind her. She hooked Cain on the jaw, and he barely flinched at the punch. His fist collided so hard against her ribs, that she doubled over. His hand closed around her throat, and he smashed her head back against the wall. White dots hovered in the air between them, and the night turned darker, pressing over her.

“How tough, you make my blood boil.” He secured both her wrists in one of his big hands, and leaned closer, pressing a kiss under her ear.

She took her knee up as fast as she could, hitting him in the groin and making Cain double over. “Fucking bitch!” He groaned between ragged breaths. “Xavier, for fuck’s sake, hold her.”

New arms grabbed her, pulling her from over the wall and trapping her. Xavier was behind her, holding her arms behind her back, and being so close that she could hear his breathing. Cain stood in front, a hand still clutching his groin as pain flickered in his semblance. His other hand reached up to her throat, and the white dots danced like crazy in front of her eyes.

“Now, hold her tight you fucking dumbass, I want to see what secrets hide under that mask… And the rest of it.”


	15. Testosterone for days

The stars were flickering in the moonless sky as the group of friends lied sprawled on the grass, empty cans of soda littering the space and loose papers and notebooks long forgotten on the table only a few steps away.

“What a beautiful night,” Thea said, her head resting on Kaya’s lap.

Sam glanced at his watch and got his phone out of the pocket of his black jeans. Celaena hadn’t texted all night, and he knew there was no point expecting her to, but she could at least reply to his texts. He typed another quick message wondering how the fight had ended and put the phone away.

Lysandra’s voice raised over the chit-chat that had taken over her backyard, always so commanding but caring.

“Should I order some more pizzas? Is anybody still hungry?” 

Everybody laughed almost in unison, telling her there was no way they could fit another single bite. She had fed them all kinds of snacks during the early afternoon, and had ordered enough pizzas to feed the whole football team afterward.

“Okay, okay,” Lys laughed with them. “I’ll go fetch some more drinks then.”

“Don’t,” Sam stood up from his spot on the grass next to her. “I’ll do it this time.” He needed to move, to get a little distraction to stop worrying about Celaena. He knew worrying was pointless, but he couldn’t help it.

“I’ll help you.” Aedion stood up from Lysandra’s other side and followed him into the house through the double glass doors. 

They walked through the kitchen in silence, and Sam opened the fridge and started getting cans out, and passing them over to the team captain standing behind him. Once he thought they had enough, Sam closed the fridge’s door and turned around to find Aedion staring at him. 

“Did I miss anything? Do you want more cream soda?” 

“Em, no, it’s okay. Just wondering if you’re okay. I know it’s none of my concern, but you seem a bit… off tonight.” Aedion was shifting his weight from one foot to the other, his arms full of rattling cans of soda.

Sam wished he could tell him the truth, but that was impossible. “I’m alright,” he said instead.

“You know, you can-” Whatever Aedion was about to say got interrupted as Ren Allsbrook walked into the kitchen from the front, as if entering his own house. There was a huge smile on his face as he greeted them.

“Hey, lads! Oh, cream soda!” The principal’s son grabbed a can out of Aedion’s arms and cracked it open as the rest of the team filled in through the hallway.

“What are you all doing here?” The captain asked while all the cans disappeared from his arms one by one. 

“We knew you’d be here, and enough party organizing, it’s actual party time!” Ren patted Aedion on the back and headed towards the half-empty box with cold pizza sitting next to the fridge. 

He jumped up and sat on the counter, a slice of pizza in one hand, and the soda in the other.

“Hi Sam, when are you officially joining the team?” Ress Brulleman bumped his fist and took a seat next to Ren.

“I’m not really into playing sports,” he lied. “I'd rather watch them.”

“Cheeky bugger, he likes watching the cheerleaders from the sidelines, right?” Ben hooked an arm over Sam’s shoulders casually, as if they’d been friends for their whole lives. “I’d do the same if I didn’t have to play.”

“Watch your mouth, one of those girls is mine,” Aedion said in a playful tone.

“And Sammy here is really good friends with her, isn’t he?” Ben winked, and Aedion rolled his eyes, but crossed his arms over his chest and faked a stern look.

“You know, we’re just that, really good friends,” Sam lifted his hands up, hoping someone would finally understand he had no romantic interest in Lysandra. 

Before Aedion could reply, the girl herself walked into the kitchen, her hands on her hips as she took over the scene. Ress and Ren were seated on the counter side by side, chewing on their slices of cold pizza. Ben still had an arm around Sam’s shoulders, standing by the fridge. And Aedion was standing by the kitchen isle, his arms folded, while Ilias was silently standing to one side, a half-smile on his lips.

“I don’t recall inviting you guys to my place,” Lys said with her brows furrowed. “But, welcome!” She added with a huge smile as she relaxed and went over to hug each of them individually. 

“Should I order more pizza?” She asked as she finished her round and went to stand next to her boyfriend, an arm wrapped around his waist and her head resting on his shoulder.

Sam watched the smile that spread on Aedion’s lips, the way his eyes traveled down to Lysandra’s hair as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. He raised an arm to play with one of her long brown curls as the rest of the team cheered and thanked her for the food and hospitality. 

“Okay, let me go make the call.” Aedion squeezed Lys’ waist before he let go and she walked out of the room.

“Fuck, you did win the lottery with that one,” Ren said with a mouthful as they all watched her walk away. 

“I did.” Aedion’s reply stung in Sam’s chest, and he shook his head, walking out of the kitchen as he excused himself.

He heard the boys starting to chatter loudly again as he opened the glass doors and slipped onto the backyard. He sat back down on his previous spot, joining the cheerleader’s conversation as if he’d never left.

“Definitely Ress!” Briar was saying. She blushed a little as Sam joined them, but kept going. “I mean, he’s got that beautiful ash-blond hair that always looks a little messy, and he just seems so cute! I think he’s the kind of guy that’d pamper the shit out of his girlfriend.”

“No, no, no way,” Ansel was saying. “He seems too innocent, I think Ilias would be a better partner in crime, the quiet ones always hide something interesting under their sleeves.”

“I agree,” Thea said as she laughed a little. “You know, if I liked boys, I think he’d be more like my type. The dark hair, and those compelling green eyes.”

“Thea!” Kaya said as she ruffled her hair. 

“What? You like both boys and girls, you tell me what you think then! The fact that I don’t like boys doesn’t mean I can’t comment, right Sam?”

Sam cleared his throat and ran a hand through his messy hair, looking through the kitchen doors and watching the boys still eating cold pizza and being silly. “I don’t know,” he said.

“Come on, we’ll make it easier,” Ansel quipped. “Best eyes out of those guys in there.”

“Ilias,” Thea and Ansel said at the same time.

“Aedion,” Kaya giggled.

“I’ll stick with Ress,” Briar said, shrugging.

“What? He’s got boring brown eyes!” Ansel complained.

“Not true! Anyways, Sam?”

“Okay, I think... I’ll vote for Aedion’s too,” Sam said, laughing a little at the silly game.

“Yes!” Kaya jumped up, making Thea jump to a sitting position too as her head bounced on Kaya’s lap.

“Next,” Ansel said, lifting a hand. “Best body?”

All the girls seemed to think it over for a moment, looking through the glass to inspect the team.

“Ren,” Ansel concluded.

“Ditto,” Kaya agreed.

“I’ll go with Ben,” Thea said, getting booed for it. “What? He’s a bit shorter and skinny, he’ll be a better match for me, I’d look like a gnome next to any of the others!” Everybody laughed at this, and Sam leaned back on his elbows.

“I’ll vote for Aedion,” Briar said, blushing all over again.

“What are you voting my boyfriend for?” Lys approached the group and sat next to Sam.

“They’re voting for the best body in the team,” he explained.

“Oh, I’ll definitely go with Aedion too! You should see him without his clothes on,” Lys wiggled her eyebrows, her lips tugging up in that huge smile that could light up a whole room as everybody laughed out loud.

“What about you, Sam?” Ansel pushed.

“Are you playing too?” Lys turned to him with an eyebrow raised, and Sam’s cheeks heated up.

“They made me,” he said innocently.

“You know,” Lysandra scooted closer to him and lowered her voice. “You can vote for him too, I wouldn’t mind.” Sam watched Lysandra with his eyes wide open, and she cracked up laughing. “Time for a new game, girls, the boys are about to join!” Lysandra said once the laughter eased.

As if on cue, the boys walked into the yard, Ren holding a pile of pizza boxes in his hands, while Ilias carried a keg of beer over his shoulder as if it was a stereo. Ben popped a little speaker on the grass inside the circle of assembled girls, and the music started playing as the boys sat on the grass. Cups started to circulate, the chatter got louder and seconds seemed to blur into minutes, and hours.

The girls danced a little choreography as the boys sang and clapped, the team started playing drinking games, making bets, and suddenly, somehow, Ren was jumping into the pool in his underwear and calling everybody a chicken for not following. Ben was the first to follow him in, his back muscles flexing as he jumped headfirst, his little black boxers snuggly fit around his thighs. Ress cannonballed while he laughed, splashing everybody and making the girls all stand up as they squealed. 

The three boys jumped out, soaking wet and dripping water, and ran after the girls, lifting them in the air and dropping them into the pool with their clothes still on. Thea and Kaya went in first, almost at the same time, and came out screaming and complaining about how cold the water was.

“Don’t you dare!” Ansel yelled as Ren ran after her. As she ran, she took her top over her head, threw it to a side, and ran straight to the pool, jumping head first. “I rather do things my way,” she said as her head poked back out of the water, and she showed Ren the middle finger. Her lace bra was as red as her hair, and her freckles looked like stars fallen from the skies. 

Seconds later, Aedion was cradling Lysandra in his arms as he walked towards the pool. Lys was pouting her lips, looking like a little child, but she didn’t complain as Aedion jumped in and she wrapped her arms around his neck. 

“Ilias, Sam, come one! Jump in!” Ben yelled from inside the pool. 

Ilias was standing as far away as possible, leaning against the wall of the house. “I’m good, thanks,” he said solemnly, and Ben shrugged.

“Sam?”

“I rather not,” Sam grabbed his phone out of his pocket and checked for any messages. Even if Celaena was scheduled for the last fight, she should have finished by now, and still, she hadn't texted him. Maybe he should go over to the hotel, check if she was back, see how the fight had gone.

“Come on,” Lysandra said, showing up by his side and grabbing the phone off his hand. She set the phone on the grass with the rest of their things and pushed him gently with a hand against his lower back. Suddenly, she smiled a mischievous smile as she yelped: “Now!” 

She shoved him forward, and Aedion tackled him by his middle, scooped him up onto his shoulder, and ran the few feet separating them from the pool. The water hit him hard, waking up all of his senses. The water was freezing cold, and his shirt got stuck to his skin as he jumped out for air. Everybody around him was laughing, and a few of them were clapping. 

“Great tackle, captain!” Ren high fived Aedion.

Lysandra jumped back in, and swam to their side, wrapping an arm around Aedion’s shoulders and letting her body float, her foot intently brushing the side of Sam’s arm.

“Stay,” Lys mouthed to him as if she could read his mind; as if she knew he was planning on leaving only a minute ago. 

So Sam took his soaking wet shirt over his head, threw it on the grass, and stayed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey my lovely readers! Just a reminder, that if you survived Tower of Dawn, then you can survive waiting until next chapter to know what happens with Aelin! Haha  
> Don't hate me, I promise her POV is back in the next one which will be up on Saturday! Thanks for popping by and much love to you all! :D


	16. Derailing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope this makes up for the last update!  
> Enjoy the chapter, and thanks so much for reading and for all the lovely comments, love you all! :D
> 
> PS: Yesterday I finally made a cover for this story so I can start uploading it on wattpad in the upcoming weeks, you can have a peek at it on my insta if you'd like :) There's also peeks of my other original stories, which are all free reads on either wattpad or inkitt n_n

Cain’s fingers were digging into Celaena’s throat, and her shoulders were tightly pulled back as her wrists were pinned together at her back.

“Now you’ll pay for making me look like a fool,” Xavier’s lips brushed against her ear from behind, making her want to puke. She opened up her mouth to speak, but Cain’s grip tightened, making her gasp for air instead.

“No, little princess, your time for speaking is over, now you listen, and enjoy,” Cain ran a finger through the side of her face, and pushed his thumb against the sore spot over her temple. The blood was dripping down her cheek, her brow split up after Cain’s last punch. 

His fingers lingered around the edge of her mask, playing with it. As he pulled from it in one fast motion, bright lights shined behind his back. Cain looked over his shoulder, and Celaena used the distraction to bring both of her knees up to her chest and kicked Cain hard against the stomach. Xavier stammered back, and she fell on top of him, pain shooting up her shoulder as they both hit the floor. 

“Hey!” Through the blinding light, a new figure emerged from the street. 

Celaena got up and kicked Xavier in the ribs over and over while he laid on the floor. He crawled back against the wall and used it for support to get up when she doubled over, the pain on her side finally unbearable. Before she could recover, Xavier ran past her and out of the alley. The newcomer was wrestling with Cain, a blur of fists and arms dancing in the air only a few feet away.

Celaena rested a hand over the wall and doubled over holding her side. Blood was dripping down again, the floor moving under her feet. She turned, pushing her back against the wall, trying to steady herself.  _ Wait for the brawl to move to the side, and run through the gap _ , she told herself. When the newcomer pinned Cain against the wall, Celaena ran towards the light, feeling herself move in slow motion, a hand still braced against the wall until she got to the end of the alley. Before she could turn the corner, a pair of hands grabbed her from behind, and she threw her elbow back, hitting something solid.

“Agh, hot damn girl, I’m here to help you.” 

She turned around towards the strained voice behind her. “I don’t... need… help.” She wheezed between each word and spat blood onto the concrete as she finished.

“You’re tougher than they give you credit for. Now come on, I have your bag, let’s get you somewhere where I can look at those wounds.” She looked up, and found Fenrys’ onyx eyes looking down at her, his golden hair was all messed up, and there was a small cut to the side of his cheekbone.

“Cain?” Her voice was so small, she mentally scolded herself for it.

“Unconscious,” Fenrys said with a smug smile. “Now, please? Would you let me help you? Not because you need the help, but because I  _ want _ to help you.”

He had her bag hanging from a shoulder, and a pair of car keys dangling from his hand. His car was parked at the entrance of the alley, the lights still on, illuminating Cain’s body slumped over in the middle of the alleyway. She didn’t have much choice, she had lost too much blood and there was no way she could make it to Arobynn’s place on her own.

As she nodded slowly, Connall jumped out of the passenger seat of the car and opened up the back door for her. 

“Thank you brother, better late than never,” Fenrys’ joked.

“Didn’t look like you needed my help, and it wasn’t my fight,” his brother replied nonchalantly. 

Celaena dragged herself onto the back seat, blood smudging on the seat.

“I hope you know how to stitch,” she grumbled as Fenrys jumped onto the driver’s seat and closed the door behind him. 

“Plenty of experience.” He winked as he looked back at her, and then his expression turned serious. He turned around and backed away from the alley fast, the tires screeching loudly. 

“Wait! My bike... Please.”

“Where is it?” Fenrys asked quickly, looking at her over the rearview mirror as he sped forward.

“Three blocks down, the alley to the left.” Her fingers trembled as she pulled the keys out of her bag’s pocket. 

“Connall,” Fenrys pointed back with a motion of his head.

Connall reached back for her keys, and she held tight for a second. “Take care of it with your life,” she hissed as Connal yanked the keys out of her hand. Fenrys slammed the breaks, Connall jumped down, and before she could even blink, they were speeding down the street again.

_ Stay awake,  _ she told herself.  _ Keep your eyes open, don’t trust anybody. _

“Honey, keep your eyes open, don’t you fucking die in my car!”

She wanted to laugh, to say something snarky or joke about the fact that it’d take so much more than that dickhead to kill her; but her eyelids dropped, turning the world around her into a dark pit of nothingness. Little dots of light danced in front of her lids and her body was yanked backward by the speed of the car accelerating once more. The car was so cold, she shivered.

She could swear she heard Fenrys’ voice as everything dissolved around her. “Fuck. Please don’t.”

***

The pain woke her back up, and Celaena jumped to a crouch on instinct, landing on something soft.

“Woah, fucking hell! Take it easy. Okay, this is good, you’re alive.” Fenrys ran a hand through his brow, wiping the sweat away.

Celaena eased against the wall behind her and looked around the room. She was crouching on a double bed, and Fenrys was sitting on a low stool by her side, a mass of bloody gauze lying on the floor. As he lifted his hands, she saw the needle and thread on his right hand.

“Please, lie back down,” he sounded gentle all of a sudden, so she did; not because he said so, but because the room was spinning around her again. It was a small room, and the light overhead was bright, making her blink repeatedly.

“What?” She groaned and cleared her throat. “What happened?”

“You passed out in the car, you lost too much blood.” He grabbed a bottle of water from a small side table and handed it to her. “Drink, you’ll need plenty of fluids to make up for it unless you want to go to a hospital for a transfusion which I guess-”

“No way.”

“That’s what I thought. You’re stuck with me then.”

“My bike?” Fenrys rolled his eyes and pushed her shoulder gently down.

“In the garage, Connall took care of it. He said you have a nice ride, by the way.”

She leaned back, and Fenrys fixed a lamp closer to her wound. He had cut a piece of her catsuit out, leaving the wound exposed. The cut was clean, and it had stopped bleeding.

“Is it deep?” 

“No, just nasty and long, the edges are not clean so it won’t make it an easy suture. What did he cut you with?” He dug the needle in before she could reply, and mumbled a little apology as he did.

“Some kind of blade within a ring, Xavier was wearing it in the arena.”

Fenrys’ eyes snapped up at her, his hand gravitating mid-air. “What? He did that during the tournament? Why the fuck didn’t you say anything?”

“In case you didn’t notice, the crowd was already against me.”

“For fuck’s sake, you were trying to prove a point, weren’t you?”

“Don’t you dare try to teach me a lesson.” She dug her nails in her palm as the needle pierced her side again, and Fenrys shook his head lightly.

“I wouldn’t dare, I get why you’re doing what you’re doing.”

He kept working in silence, closing up the wound and then dressing it with clean gauze. He moved to her face afterward, his fingers moving gently as he cleaned the cut on her brow and patched it up. He looked at her shoulders, making sure her mobility was good enough before heading out of the room and returning with a fresh bottle of water and some pills.

“How come you're so good at this?” Celaena asked as Fenrys stepped back in.

“It’s a long story, but I was in med school for a while, before… well, before my life changed paths.” He shrugged to dismiss the matter and handed her the pills. She looked at them, dubious for a moment. “It’s for the pain. Trust me, darling, I won’t hurt you, I promise I’m on your side,” he took a hand to his chest, his lips curving up in a small smile that she would have considered adorable under other circumstances.

“Why?”

Fenrys sat back on the stool by the side of the bed, and pulled a blanket from her feet, setting it over her legs. He handed her the bottle of water and took a deep breath.

“I… There’s someone I used to know, and you remind me of her for some reason. I wish… I wish I could have helped her, and I didn’t. So,” he looked up and smiled, his confident grin back on his lips. “I’m trying to make up for it, maybe this way I won’t go to Hell.” He stood up, and made his way to the door, half closing it behind him before he stopped, and peeked through the gap. “Try and sleep, please don’t run away. If you need anything, yell, I’ll be sleeping on the couch. Take the pills if you want the pain to go away, don’t take them if you want to feel the pain. I give you my word, they’re not poison. Your bag is on the other side of the bed, on the floor. I didn’t touch it. If you want a change of clothes, just let me know, I’ll find you something. There’s a bathroom in the next door down the hall.”

When he closed the door, Celaena dropped the pills on the table and looked for her phone inside the bag. She had a few missed calls from Sam and a bunch of texts. She replied to the last one, letting him know she won, and that she was off to sleep.

She thought she could hear voices outside of the room, but she was too tired to make up what anyone was saying. Once she closed her eyes, sleep found her fast, and the nightmares with it. 

***

When she woke back up, her side felt hot, and her whole body was drenched in sweat. She heard voices outside her room again, and this time she got up slowly, leaning against the bed as she made her way to the door. She lowered the handle as slowly as she could, opening the door an inch without making any noise.

“What were you thinking, Fenrys?” A hushed voice whisper-yelled.

“What was I supposed to do? Leave her there? You know Cain, he’s not just an asshole, you’ve heard the rumors too!” Fenrys was yelling back, sounding flustered.

“I don’t give a damn. We work there, Cain can get us into deep shit if he talks about this!”

“Fucking hell, Rowan, he was going to rape her!” A loud thump made the walls vibrate and Celaena pressed a hand against her mouth.

Silence took over, and tension curled in her gut. She was going to throw up. No, no, she couldn’t throw up.  _ No, no, no. _

She inhaled through the nose, and let the air go slowly as she braced both of her hands over the wall. She was about to close the door when she heard Rowan’s voice again, barely a whisper breaking the dreaded silence.

“What do we do now?”

“We look after her until she’s good to go back to wherever she came from. We hide the fact that she’s here from everybody, and we make sure there’s always someone at home. This doesn’t leave this flat, it stays between you, me, and Connall.”

“Is she in your room?” Rowan’s tone was clipped.

“Yes, and it’s fine, it’s not the first time I crash on the couch.”

She heard steps, someone pacing up and down the room at the end of the hall. She tried to imagine what the rest of the apartment looked like, but she couldn’t remember getting in there at all.

“This is insane,” Rowan said after a moment.

“You think I don’t know that? But-”

“Don’t!”

“I couldn’t help Lyria, but I can help this girl-”

“I said, don’t!” Rowan growled, and another loud thump made the windows rattle.

A door slammed, and Celaena closed the bedroom door slowly, sliding back into bed. She wiped the sweat from her brow with a sleeve and thought about getting changed into clean clothes, but she didn’t have the energy for it. She looked at her phone, the battery almost drained. Sam had replied at two in the morning with a simple congratulations. She hoped he had gotten better results than her. She knew nothing new about her aunt, but maybe Sam had got some information from spending the night with Lysandra and Aedion.

Begrudgingly, she took the two pills from the night table and swallowed them. She closed her eyes and heard the door opening up a few minutes later but her eyelids were too heavy, so she didn’t open them.

She imaged her mother’s hand pressing against her forehead as she used to do when she was young and Aelin had a fever. 

“Mum,” she mumbled, and her mum’s fingers caressed her brow and tucked the blanket around her. The nightmares stayed away, and instead, Aelin dreamed about a banquet, and two kids happily playing around the table, unaware of the shadows lurking all around them.


	17. Don't

He opened the door slowly, trying no to wake the girl up. She was lying still on the middle of the bed, a little cress between her brows. Her pale skin had an awful greenish tint to it, and her forehead was glistening under the sun rays that filtered through the window. Her long golden hair was fanned around her, a few strands visibly wet and stuck to the sides of her face.

The house was empty and silent and almost felt haunted as he took a dubious step forward. He wasn’t sure what he was meant to do, but he wasn’t ready to let her die on his watch, and it looked like she was burning up with a fever.

Remembering his childhood, he headed back down the hall into the kitchen and filled up a pot with water. He emptied all the ice trays in and dropped two small towels inside. 

When he got back to the room, the bed was empty, and his heart raced, thumping against his chest.

“What the-”

“Don’t move.” He felt the girl’s body pressing against his back and closed his eyes slowly, feeling the cold metal against his throat and wondering where the fuck she had found a weapon. He lifted his free hand in surrender as he held the pot in the other.

“I’m unarmed,” he said as clearly as possible.

“Who the fuck are you, and what do you want? Where am I?”

“Are you fucking delirious-” He stopped as the blade dug harder against his throat. She was. The fever was worse than he expected. For a moment, he imagined the guys coming back from work later that night and finding him bleeding out on the floor, his throat cut. He had to make an effort not to laugh at the image. “Take it easy, I was only bringing you some cold compresses,” he tried not to sound menacing or scary, using the tone he’d use to speak to a little kid.

Only for a second, her hand shook against his neck, almost like she was thinking his words over. He took his chance and brought his elbow up, hitting the arm that was holding the knife and dropping the pot at the same time as he grabbed her wrist. The water splashed loudly, the ice cubes rattling against the tiles. He leaned forward and flipped the girl over his shoulder, letting her land on the bed in front of them. Her eyelids fluttered as she tried to get back up but didn’t.

“For fucks sake, you're burning, let me just help you!”

The girl’s eyes seemed to focus on him as she pushed herself back against the headboard of the bed, resting against it.

“Rowan?” Her voice sounded so small, he almost felt bad for a second.

“Nice to see you again,” he replied sarcastically.

“Sorry.” The word sounded so foreign on the girl’s lips, that he stepped back. Her lids dropped again, and her head lolled to one side, her whole body following and falling sideways.

Rowan ran into the room and caught her by the side of the bed before she could hit the floor. “What the fuck am I supposed to do with you?” He pushed her back onto the bed and lay her down before running back to the lounge and grabbing his phone.

“Is she alive?” Fenrys’ voice said from the other side of the line as he picked up.

“Barely, mate, what did you get me into? She’s burning up, what do I do?” He was pacing the hall and watching through the door, the girl’s eyes were still closed, her skin still horribly pale.

“Get her into the tub.”

“Sorry, what?”

“You need to get her temperature down, fill the tub with cold water, not too cold, and get her in.”

“Mate, how the fuck-”

The line went dead on the other side, and Rowan cursed out loud. He headed to the bathroom and started filling up the tub with cold -but not too cold- water. He laid a few towels on the floor and went back to the room.

“Okay, I can do this.”

He put an arm under the girl's knees and another behind her neck and lifted her slowly. He walked her over to the bathroom, keeping her body away from his, his arms straining at the effort. As the girl’s bare feet touched the water, her eyelids fluttered, and he braced himself for the punch he was about to receive; but she didn’t wake. She mumbled something, and Rowan lowered her slowly into the water, keeping an arm behind her neck so she wouldn’t slide down and drown.

“The last thing I need,” he said sarcastically as he grabbed a towel with his free hand and dipped it under the water. He pressed it against her forehead until it warmed up, and then dipped it into the water again. 

He did warn her, didn’t he? The Fossa was not a place to get cocky, and he knew the girl’s attitude was going to get her in trouble. He put the towel back against her forehead and waited. He waited until his arm grew numb and her greenish skin turned back to its usual pale pink. He waited until her lips regained their color, and the memories hit him like a punch to his sternum.

“Bathe with me, honey,” Lyria had said in that cheeky but seductive way of hers.

“We’re going to be late to the party if we do that,” a young and carefree Rowan had replied.

“Well, and who cares about that?” Her smile had warmed something in his chest, and as always, he had done as she desired. They had been indeed late to the party, but it had been worth every second of it.

_ Don't go there _ , he thought, frustrated with himself. 

“Darling, where are my keys?” Lyria had asked a few weeks later, running around the hall of the same apartment he was at.

“In your jacket’s pocket, maybe?” He had walked towards their room, now his room, and grabbed the jacket out of the wardrobe.

Lyria had bolted into the bedroom, snatching the jacket off his hand. “Thanks.” He could still feel the quick peck she had pressed against his cheek before running out of the house.

_ Don't _ , he repeated.  _ Don't go there. _

“Hmm,” the girl’s eyelids opened up to reveal two dark irises staring up at Rowan, and he slid his hand from behind her neck, flexing his numb fingers. 

“You’re awake.”

“Wanna say something a bit more obvious?” The girl’s voice was rough and weak, but for the first time that day, she seemed alive. He was so relieved, that he almost laughed out loud.

“Fuck, you’re impossible. You’ve been asleep for hours, or more like passed out.” He shook his head, and leaned back, straightening his back for what felt like the first time all day.

The girl that called herself Fireheart looked around, seeming confused, but blinking until her eyes became more focused. “Well, I love sleep, my life has a tendency to fall apart when I’m awake, you might have noticed it.” She pushed herself up from the side of the tub and winced. She took a hand to her side, and Rowan grabbed her wrist before she could touch the cut.

“Fenrys said not to touch the wound.” Her wrist felt small in his roughed hands, and he wondered for a second if she could feel the callouses in his palm. He dropped her hand and staggered back once more.

“Mind explaining why I’m inside a tub, fully clothed, while you’re… sitting in the toilet?” He jumped up to his feet and rubbed the back of his neck.

“I thought you were about to die, okay? It was Fenrys’ idea.” 

“And you do everything Fenrys tells you to do, because...” She let the last word roll as a question, and Rowan almost laughed. He had to give it to her, the kid had a spine.

“Come on, let’s get you out of here and back in bed, Doctor Fenrys suggested more painkillers once you were awake, and antibiotics for the infection you probably have in that horrible wound.” 

Her smile dropped as she looked down, her fingers touching the skin around the cut carefully.

“It will leave a scar, sorry to break it to you.” He took a step towards her, ready to help her to her feet.

“You think that’s what worries me?” She glanced at him with a single eyebrow lifted. “It's not my first scar. We all bear scars, you know, this one just happens to be more visible than most.” She stood up on trembling feet and braced a hand against the wall, ignoring Rowan’s outstretched hand as she took one foot out of the bath, and then the other. “This would be a good time for you to bring me some dry clothes unless you want me to go dripping all over the apartment.”

Rowan stood motionless for a moment as the words sunk in, and then rushed into his bedroom at the end of the hall. He closed the door behind him, leaning against it as he ran his hands through his hair. This girl was going to drive him mad. How a teen could have so much sass in her, especially after almost being beaten to death, was beyond him.

He opened up the bottom drawer of his dresser, and looked through his shirts, not knowing what he was looking for. He decided on a black plain tee and then opened up his pajama drawer, finding his only pair of cotton pants that had an elastic waist. It was the best option he could come up with.

When he returned to the bathroom, the girl was still standing on the same spot, one hand against the wall as she tried to dry her hair with a towel on the other. 

“Uhm, this is the best I could find.” He handed her the clothes, and she smirked as she grabbed them off him.

“Nice pajama pants, kid.”

He was going to lose his mind, he was certain of it. “Just put it on,” he grumbled. He was about to walk out but hesitated at the door as he watched her face turn back to that concerned look he was getting so used to. “You…. need any help?” he asked gingerly.

“Fuck, no,” she replied quickly, but then she opened and closed her mouth a couple of times. “Actually...” She took a step forward and laid the clothes on top of the toilet seat. “I hate to ask this, but my shoulder is killing me, and there’s a zip at my back I don’t think I can reach.”

Rowan swallowed, and stared. Their eyes were locked for so long, that the air between them turned tense. “Uhm, okay?” he said after the longest pause.

The girl cracked up laughing then and had to hold her side as her face contorted in pain. “Damn, should have seen your face, have you ever seen a girl naked? You looked terrified.”

“Fuck off.” Rowan regretted the way he spat the words, coldly, as soon as they left his lips; but by then, he had already slammed the door between them and walked back to his bedroom.

He couldn’t do this. He was no teen’s guardian, and he had no idea how to deal with the girl. They didn’t even know who the fuck this girl was, but there was no way she was good news if she was part of one of Maeve’s tournaments. They needed to get her out of the apartment as soon as they could. She needed to heal fast, faster, and be out of their lives. Fenrys had been such a fool for rescuing her. He knew she was hurt and probably talking through pain medication and dizziness, she did sound a lot like their drunk customers, but still. This was no place for her.

A dry thud had him out of his thoughts and back in the hallway in a second. He leaned against the bathroom’s door, listening in.

“Damn stupid zip, why did I think it was a good idea to fight in this damned catsuit?”

Rowan held a hand against his mouth, trying not to laugh.

“Okay, deep breath, shoulder, you can do this.” A second later, he heard her whimper, and his knuckles were knocking on the door before he could even think about it.

“Yes? What do you want?”

“Excuse me.” He opened the door slowly, giving her time to cover if needed. He cleared his throat loudly and took one step inside the bathroom. The girl had her hair up in a messy bun, and a sting of pain flared in Rowan’s chest as he remembered that was exactly the way Lyria’s hair used to look after a shower. “Do you actually need help?”

The girl looked to the floor, her cheeks slightly pink in a way he had never seen them before. 

“You know, I won’t tell a soul that I helped you,” he said in a softer tone. The girl looked up, pressing her lips into a thin line.

“Not a single soul?”

“Not a single soul,” he promised.

“Okay.” Her voice was still full of doubts, but she took a step towards him regardless. “Now, close your eyes.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me, close your eyes, I don’t want you looking. I’m… Just close your eyes, okay?”

Rowan stood in front of her motionless and closed his eyes. A small and cold hand grabbed his, lifting it and resting it over her shoulder. She pushed his hand lightly, moving it towards the back of her neck. “Do you feel the zipper there?” The girl asked, and her breath was like a breeze against his cheek.

“Yes.”

“Okay, just pull it down.” She let go of his hand, and Rowan pulled down slowly, his arm brushing against the side of hers as the zip slid down easily. Once the zip got to her lower back and his forearm grazed against her hand, she grabbed him by the wrist. “That’s enough,” she said softly, and then swallowed loudly. “Don’t open your eyes, and turn around.” She let go of his wrist, and he did as he was told.

When he opened his eyes again, he found himself staring into the empty hall.

“Not a single soul,” she repeated behind his back. Rowan stepped through the threshold and heard the door closing behind him.

Not knowing what else to do, he headed back into his room and waited for Fenrys and Connall to return from work. 

So much for wanting a chill Sunday for himself.


	18. Sidetracking

Sunday was a blur mix of images in Celaena’s mind, and she wasn’t sure what had been real, and what had been a dream. Waking up in a stranger’s room, she started piecing all the bits of information together, trying to collect as many facts as she could about her situation.

She got up from the bed, and had a drink of water from the bedside table. There were a couple of blisters with painkillers, and she decided to take just one more to blur the pain and help her focus. She was done with feeling weak and useless. Her phone was also on the night table, connected to a charger on the wall that wasn’t her own; she was surprised to find it there as she couldn’t remember asking for one. 

Looking down at herself, she laughed; she was wearing a pair of male pajama pants with drawings of dinosaurs in all colors and shapes. After checking her phone, she started rushing around and picking up the few belongings that were scattered around the room and throwing them back into her duffle bag. If she wanted to make it in time to go to school, she’d have to go back to the hotel to get her uniform, shower, get changed, and apply a ton of makeup. Probably too much makeup. Time was barely on her side. 

She looked around the room until she finally found a small mirror on the inside of the closet’s door. She looked pale, and the cut on her brow was still swollen, the skin around it was a mixture of green, yellow and purple. She rolled her sore shoulders and then lifted her top to look at the long cut on top of her hip bone; the skin around it felt a little tight, but the redness had almost disappeared and the stitches looked good.

As she heard voices outside the room, she hurried to her bag, grabbed her contacts and put them on using the small mirror again. Her eyes were still sore from wearing the contacts for way longer than she was supposed to and sleeping with them the night before, but she added some eye drops and hoped it’d do for the moment. She barely remembered taking them off on Sunday, and hoped she hadn’t been stupid enough to let any of the guys see her eyes. 

Not like they could make anything out of it anyways. 

A knock sounded at her door, and it slid open slowly almost as soon as she reached the handle.

“You’re up early,” Fenrys said, sounding surprised.

“Yes, I’m feeling way better.” 

“You’re leaving,” he said as his eyes darted around the room and focused on her bag. It wasn’t a question, but she answered anyway.

“I am, I need to head to school.” She bit her tongue as soon as the words were out of her mouth. The pain was certainly still messing with her mind, she normally wouldn’t have been so stupid to let such a big piece of information slip out of her mouth.

Fenrys’ eyes didn’t give much away, but his smirk did. “School, huh? Why don’t you join us for breakfast before you go? Connall’s making eggs, and he’s a fine cook.”

“I don’t really have time for-”

“I insist,” Fenrys hooked an arm around her and ushering her out of the room. “What kind of host would I be if I didn’t feed you, right? You haven’t eaten pretty much anything in two days, you need your strength back.” He might have noticed her body going tense at the contact, because he let go of her almost as fast as he had grabbed her. “Please?” He added with pleading eyes.

Begrudgingly, she walked with him down the hall and towards the kitchen. It was probably a good idea to gather some information on these people before leaving anyways, and she was actually famished. 

The open plan lounge was small, but practical. To her left, there was a couch in front of a small TV that had some blankets and a pillow on top, and two small armchairs. And to the right, a small kitchen and a table with four chairs around it. Connall was cooking on the stove, his back to them, and he barely looked over his shoulder as they walked into the room. 

“Morning, brother!” Fenrys chanted happily.

“Hm, morning,” Celaena said, feeling slightly uncomfortable but slowly slipping into the character she had to play. 

“Come on, let’s grab a seat,” Fenrys pointed to a chair, and she took a seat, looking around the room discreetly.

“So, it’s just the three of you living here?” She asked, pretending to make small chat.

“Yes, it is. So glad to see that you’re off your defensive horse.”

Celaena glared at him, and then softened her look. “I apologize if I caused you any inconveniences or if I was rude. If I’m honest, my memories from what’s happened in the last day and a half are a bit hazy, but I know I owe you one; the stitches look great.”

Fenrys’ smile spread wide on his face as he looked at her up and down, as if trying to check how well she was actually feeling. 

“You’re welcome, I’m glad you're feeling better. You have some color back on your cheeks... If you wanted to pay me back, you could always stay for a while longer, so I can make sure you’re properly healed.”

“I do feel almost back to my normal self,” Celaena shook her head, and Fenrys sighed as he smiled warmly at her.

“You are so much stronger than what meets the eyes, you know that, right? I think you might be the bravest teen I have ever encountered, you almost had those guys back at the alley.” He said encouragingly. 

Connall came over with two plates full of scrambled eggs and toast then, and put one in front of each of them, then returned to the stove and came back a moment later with his own plate, and a tray full of crispy bacon. Celaena was glad for the interruption as everybody looked at the food in awe.

“Bon appétit," Fenrys lifted a glass of orange juice as if doing a toast.

“Thanks Connall, and thank you too, Fenrys.”

“Eat up,” Fenrys grabbed a forkful of eggs, and Celaena followed suit.

The eggs were delicious, and considering how hungry she was, she ate her whole plate without paying much attention to anything going on around her. Once she was done, she looked up, only to find both Fenrys and Connall staring at her.

“Do you want some more?” Connall asked jokingly, a half smile showing on his face for the first time.

“Is there any more?” She asked softly, making both brothers laugh. Connall went over to the counter and returned with a new plate full with eggs and fresh bread.

“It was meant to be for Rowan, but he’s taking too long on the 24/7, so you can have it. I’ll make him more later.” He slid the plate in front of her, and Celaena grabbed a mouthful of egg, aware of Fenrys’ eyes still on her.

“So, school, huh?”

She looked up at him through her lashes, and shook her head.

“I think you’re smart enough to know I won't tell you anything about it.”

Fenrys’ laughed out loud while Connall collected the empty plates and headed towards the sink. There were only a bunch of schools in the city, but they were enough for them to have to actively search if they wanted to find out which one she attended. 

“Girl, I don’t even know your name.”

“And that’s how it’s meant to remain. I need to leave, and you should forget any of this ever happened.”

“Are you sure you're feeling good enough to leave? I really don’t think you should be going to school, you need to rest and take care of those stitches. Do I need to remind you that you lost a lot of blood?”

“Trust me, I remember.”

Her eyes dropped back down to her plate as she ate slower now, the memories of everything that had happened catching back with her. She had been careless and stupid, she should have never allowed for Cain to get so close to her, to make her so vulnerable. She didn’t want to admit it, but she was lucky Fenrys had seen them and stepped in; she didn’t want to imagine what would have happened if he didn’t.

When they heard the front door open, they both turned around, and found Rowan standing under the threshold, his hands full of grocery bags.

“What the fuck is this?” He dropped the bags to the floor and slammed the door shut behind him.

Celaena jumped to her feet on instinct, and Fenrys walked forward, standing almost in front of her. “What’s wrong, Rowan?”

“What’s wrong?” Rowan yelled back. He stormed towards them, and pushed Fenrys with a palm against his chest. “Couldn’t you have given her any other fucking seat?”

Celaena watched them confused as Fenrys’ expression changed, his eyes dropping and his palms raising up. “I’m sorry mate, I didn’t… didn’t think about it.”

Rowan’s cheeks were bright red, one fist clenched by his side, and the other grabbing a fistful of Fenrys’ shirt. Celaena cleared her throat lightly, and Rowan turned to her, as if remembering she was standing there. His eyes travelled down to the pajama pants she was wearing, and if she didn’t know the guy better, she would have thought his eyes were filling up with tears. He let go of Fenrys and, pushing him to the side, stormed towards the hallway.

“Fuck.” Fenrys ran after him, leaving Celaena standing on the spot, speechless and confused. He disappeared down the hall, and then she heard the knocking on a door, a door opening and closing, and muffled yelling as Fenrys and Rowan argued behind closed doors, possibly in Rowan’s bedroom. 

Connall showed up by her side, and she looked at him questioningly. “What was that about?” He shook his head, and pointed to the bags by the door.

“Help me with the groceries.”

She followed him as they picked up the bags, took them to the kitchen counter and started unpacking all the food. They worked in silence for a while, the muffled argument in the distance going quieter and quieter, until Connall sighed and looked at her. 

“You were sitting on her seat,” he said, as if that explained everything.

“Who’s seat?”

“Rowan’s ex.”

“Oh, okay.” Confused, Celaena got a bunch of bananas out of a bag and passed them over to Connall, who set them on a fruit bowl and turned around to get some cans out of another bag. 

“So, what’s the deal? Is the seat sacred or something?” She grabbed the last of the apples off the bag and set them on the fruit bowl. Connall poked his head out of the pantry, looking at her with his characteristic nonchalant expression.

“She’s dead.”

Celaena’s jaw dropped, Connall’s head disappeared back behind the pantry’s door, and as if on queue, Rowan walked into the room. There was an awkward silence as Celaena held an empty bag on her hands, and Rowan just stood there in front of the hallway door, looking at her. As she opened her mouth to say something, anything, Fenrys showed up behind Rowan and set a hand hard on his shoulder.

“My mate here wanted to apologize for overreacting,” he said, a huge smile on his face. Rowan scoffed and rolled his eyes, but then looked at her, nodding lightly.

“I’m sorry for overreacting.” Rowan said, nonchalant.

“And… for being a moody prick?” Fenrys spur him on, making Rowan roll his eyes again.

“And for being a moody prick.” Rowan’s right corner of his mouth turned up ever so slightly.

“Apology accepted.” Celaena had to admit, she almost liked Fenrys and his way of dealing with things. But her time was over, and she needed to hurry and head to the hotel if she wanted to have enough time to do her makeup. There was probably no useful information within the apartment, nothing worth her time. “Now, it’s my time to head out.”

“Don’t forget to return Rowan his pajamas before you go.” Fenrys winked at her, and Celaena darted out of the kitchen, pushing the guys to the side as she passed the door and headed back to the bedroom.  _ Rowan’s pajamas? _ She remembered then, barely, how Rowan had given her some of his own clothes the day before.  _ Had he been in the bathroom with her? _ She shook her head dismissing the crazy memory of Rowan helping her, that part surely must have been a dream. 

Celaena got her bag, and as she was about to head out of the room, her phone rang. It was Sam’s name on the screen.

“Cortland.”

“Hey, you’ve been MIA this weekend, I expected to hear more about the fight. Should I pop into the hotel before school?”

“I don’t think so, I’m running late and will be just in time for class.”

“Oh, okay. Any new developments I should hear about? I’ve heard from Arobynn, he’ll be out of town all week again, I think he’s headed over to Terrasen.”

“Not much, really. Look, can’t talk right now, gotta go.” She hung up, fixed her bag over her shoulder, and walked towards the lounge. 

All three flatmates were sitting on the couches as she approached. “Okay, thanks for your hospitality, but I guess this is goodbye.”

As Fenrys stood up, a loud knock sounded on the front door. Fenrys’ eyes widened, Rowan jumped to his feet, and Connall raised his eyebrows.

“You,” Fenrys mouthed to Rowan as he pointed at her. 

Rowan walked quickly to her side, and pushed her gently with a hand in the small of her back. He led her towards the room on the back of the hall as she heard Fenrys calling ‘coming’ while he walked loudly around the lounge.

Rowan left the door ajar as he leaned in, his ear against the gap. 

“Hey, how can I help you?” Fenrys’ voice reached them from the entrance.

“I have a message for you all,” an unknown male voice replied. It sounded deep, but young.

“What is Lorcan Salvaterre doing here?” Rowan murmured to himself, and Celaena stepped back, the school database popping in her head as the name rang a bell. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Hope you enjoyed this little chapter and you all have a Merry Christmas!! :D


	19. Move On

Rowan didn’t understand why he had to be the one hiding with the girl. Fenrys had always been the one somehow in charge of the flat, as if being the oldest gave him an advantage in that sense. Not like you can really be older than your twin, but Fenrys always prided himself in the fact that he was born two minutes before Connall. And Rowan didn’t have much discussion in the matter, he was three years younger than his flatmates after all. He didn’t normally mind it, he had always been mature for his age, and often thought he was even more mature than the twins combined. Even if Fenrys was 25 already, he still acted like he was 18 most of the time.

“A message for us?” His friend was saying in the lounge.

Rowan closed the door shut. He wanted to listen to the conversation, but he was also aware of the girl standing behind him, and the fact that she probably shouldn’t hear any kind of message coming from Maeve.

“You can have a seat if you want,” he told her as he pointed to the bed.

“Who’s that at the door?” The girl asked in a whisper and surprised him by actually taking a seat as he suggested. She left her duffel bag next to the bed, and sat down, crossing one leg on top of the other.

“Just someone from work.” 

“From the fights, you mean?” 

“Yes, from the fights. That’s not all we do, you know? We act as security in other venues as well.”

_ Why was he giving her that kind of information? _ He shook his head, feeling stupid for saying more than what has needed.

“But that guy at the door, he works at the fights, right?”

“So curious all of a sudden.” 

The girl bit her lip, and then shrugged theatrically.

“I’m stuck here, I thought I might as well just spark up some conversation.” She leaned against the headboard, looking bored.

“He works for our boss.” He explained against his better judgment. “Not necessarily at the fights, he’s more like… the kid that runs errands and delivers messages, the bottom of the chain if you know what I mean.”  _ Damn, this girl was good at getting his tongue to loosen up. _

“He sounds young,” she said, leaning sideways onto an elbow. She was wearing leather tights and a long-sleeved cream top with a low neckline, and Rowan got a glimpse of her flat stomach as she leaned farther back.

“He’s probably about your age,” he replied, knowing that the information was meaningless. Looking away towards the door, he peeked out again. He could still hear Fenrys talking in the lounge, so he closed the door and leaned against it. The atmosphere in the room was awkward. He had been so rude for no reason with the girl earlier and could feel how she was trying to analyze him now; which was annoying him.

“Can I ask you a question?” She shuffled back, sitting back against the headboard and resting a hand gently over her side. She looked a bit pale again, her lips faintly pink, and Rowan almost asked if she was feeling okay before deciding against it. The image of the girl sitting on his bed was unsettling him, no woman had been in that bed after…  _ after _ .

“You can ask, I don’t guarantee I’ll reply.” He crossed his arms over his chest and waited for whatever was about to come his way. Anything was better than the memories trying to creep upon him.

“Have you been working at the fights for long? I know this tournament has been popular for years, or so I’ve heard.”

_ Easy enough question. _ “Just for a few years.”

“And Fenrys and Connall?”

“About the same, but that’s not my question to answer.”

“And… How old are you? If that might be a question for you to answer. I mean, you look a bit old...” She shrugged, and he almost felt like punching her for it.  _ Old? Please, he wasn’t that much older than her! _ Not like he would ever punch a woman anyway.

“I’ll answer your question if you answer one first, this is not a fair game otherwise.”

She seemed to think it over, playing with the edge of her top and pouting her lips before she looked back up at him.

“Okay, I’ll give you just one answer.” She smirked at him, and he realized he had so many questions he wanted to ask. 

_ But no, he did not care. _ It didn’t matter that she was the youngest female fighter he had seen at the tournament. Or that she was the best fighter he had watched in that place. Nor did it matter that she had survived being beaten up by those thugs and was now acting as nothing had even happened. It didn’t matter that she was pretending she wasn’t in pain when Rowan could see how she kept clutching her side and clenching her teeth whenever she moved. How she couldn’t find a comfortable position and keep shuffling around on the bed.

“What’s your name?” He asked finally, the question slipping off his lips without his mind’s consent. “I can’t get myself to call you Fireheart, it sounds stupid,” he added when he saw her scowl.

She narrowed her eyes, and her lips pursed to one side. “You ask complicated questions.”

“It’s just a name, and you know ours. You know where we live, you know so much about us already. What are you so scared of? What are you hiding?” He regretted the questions as soon as he said them.  _ He didn’t care, it didn’t matter _ . He could keep calling her girl, but for some reason, not even having a name was annoying him. After all, she did know who they all were and where they lived, they were at a clear disadvantage. They had all put themselves in danger to host her at their house, the least she could do, was give them a name. After a moment that was almost too long, the girl nodded and smiled up at him. It was a little twisted smile, and it kind of suited her.

“I guess you have a point.” She paused for a moment, and Rowan thought she wasn’t going to tell him after all. “You can call me Celaena.”

_ Celaena _ … It was a weird feeling, but he thought the name didn’t really suit her, it wasn’t what he was expecting. 

“Just so you know, I always keep my word... I’m 22.”

At that moment, a knock sounded on the door and Rowan turned around fast, opening the door only an inch and moving his body to occupy the gap so whoever was at the door couldn’t see inside the room.

“Just me,” Fenrys said from the other side, smirking from ear to ear.

Rowan stepped back and opened the door fully. “What did he want?” He asked cautiously.

“Nothing too important, he was just delivering a message. Connall has gone back to work with him, and I’ll have to pull an all-nighter, so I might head to bed and sleep for a few hours.” He leaned to the side, looking at Celaena now standing by the bed. “I guess I’ll see you at the next round of fights.”

“You will. I’m not on for another two weeks though, but I guess I’ll see you then. Thanks for everything Fenrys.”

“You’re welcome, Fireheart.”

Celaena chuckled, grabbed her duffel bag, and took a step towards the door. “You can call me Celaena today, or if we ever ran into each other outside of that dungeon.”

Rowan scoffed while Fenrys’ laughed brightly at the joke. It shouldn’t be funny, that place did feel like a dungeon to him. After all, he was a prisoner of his life choices and was trapped there until his sentence was over.

Celaena walked the few steps left towards the door and squeezed past Fenrys onto the hallway. “Don’t mind me, I’ll see myself out.”

“Your keys are on the little table by the front door,” Fenrys called after her, “and your bike is in the garage down on the lower level... Maybe Rowan could show you where it is.”

“I’m sure I can find it on my own.”

Rowan stepped into the hallway as he remembered how Fenrys had explained she had passed out right after leaving the alley. “Do you even know how to get back to your place from here?”

“How hard can it be? Rifthold is pretty easy to navigate. How far are we from the gymnasium where the fights take place?”

“Ten minutes from here to the Fossa.” He replied. “That’s what we call it.”

“Easy, thanks again.”

Celaena finished walking down the hall and into the lounge, and Rowan found himself taking another step forward.

“Thinking about following her?” Fenrys asked in a hushed tone as he watched her walk away.

“What?” 

“Come on mate, I’ve known you for years, and I can tell when something’s cooking in that brain of yours. You don’t trust her. You think she might bring us trouble somehow. Are you thinking about following her to see where she goes?”

“No, I…”  _ Was he?  _ He was puzzled, there was something about Celaena that just didn’t make sense to him. “No, I’m not. I’m done with this. She’s gone, and we can go back to our normal lives, move on. She can keep fighting, do her thing, and we’ll do our jobs. We will go to work, make money, pay back our debts, and be out as soon as we can. We’ll follow the plan.”

Fenrys nodded, but there was a twisted smirk on his face that wouldn’t leave him. “As you say.”

“Fenrys, tell me you haven’t fallen for the girl. Please, she’s like, 8 years younger than you!”

“What? No! Don’t be stupid, she seems more like... I don’t know… A little sister,” he said dreamily. “I always wanted a little sister.”

Rowan grabbed him by the shoulders and looked him dead in the eye. “Listen to me, she is not your sister. She is not your problem to worry about, okay? We don’t need to get ourselves in deeper shit, let the girl be.” He shook Fenrys lightly, tightening his grip. “You are not her guardian, okay? You already did more than enough.”

Fenrys pushed Rowan with a palm against his chest, shaking his head as he turned around and started heading towards his own bedroom. “Don’t you worry mate, everything will be alright.”

As Fenrys closed his bedroom door, Rowan ran a hand through his long hair and let out a loud sigh. He loved his mate like a brother, but sometimes he wished Fenrys would give fewer shits. His interest in Celaena was going to get them in trouble if he didn’t drop the subject. 

He couldn’t wait to be out of it all, for their debts to be paid so they could finally be out of the lifestyle they were living. 

Rowan walked towards the window in the back of his room and looked down to the street. Only a few seconds later, a black motorbike sped out of the garage, Celaena’s blond hair dancing in the wind behind her as she accelerated towards the city center. 

_ One less thing to worry about. _

After talking with Fenrys earlier on, he was mostly convinced that Cain wasn’t going to be stupid enough to say or do anything at the fights; the matter was most likely resolved. Cain was a vengeful prick, but they didn’t think he would go after Celaena or any of them outside of the Fossa again, not if he knew what was best for him. Fenrys, Connall, and Rowan were known to be a tight team, and Cain had been around for long enough to know that if he messed with one of them, he’d be messing with all three.

Rowan slumped on his bed, looking up at the roof and trying to ease his mind, to convince himself that he was right. He was hoping that by the end of the tournament, he would have made enough money to pay most of his debt. Maybe one more tournament after that one, and he could finally be free of Lyria’s legacy.


	20. Burning hot

Celaena sped through the streets as fast as she could, the duffle bag hanging across her shoulder making the pain come back all over again. Her side was still aching, and she felt drained and tired due to the blood loss. The cold air hitting her face was a blessing, it was helping her keep her mind focused and alert. 

Once she got to the hotel, she parked in the underground parking lot, jumped on the elevator, and headed straight to her floor. Luckily, it was still early and she didn’t run into anybody on her way in, as she was sure she still looked sickish. 

When she was finally in the safety of her room, she turned on the shower and stood in front of the big mirror while undressed, waiting for the water to heat up. The scar over her hip bone was sealing nicely, and the red rim around it was mostly gone, just a faint pink remaining which meant the infection was under control. She grabbed some ointment from the cabinet and left it out so she could dab it around the wound once she was out of the shower. Her face was another deal altogether; she had big dark circles under her eyes, and the side of her face had turned all shades of green, yellow, and a little bit of purple. She could probably conceal most of it, but the cut on her brow would be visible no matter what she did to cover it.

Shaking her head, she jumped under the hot water and scrubbed her body, trying to get rid of any remnant of Cain’s disgusting scent that could be lingering on her skin. Once out, she dried and styled her hair as fast as she could, applied a ton of makeup, and then arranged her hair in curls so they would be covering the scar as best as possible. Hopefully, not many people would be paying enough attention to notice. She put on bright red lipstick to draw attention away from her eyes and added a nice big necklace over her uniform.

She looked at herself in the mirror one last time, and happy with the result, she headed out. If she rode fast, she’d make it just in time. She called the elevator button, and it showed up almost immediately. She looked at the going down arrow and smirked before the door was even fully opened.

“Good morning,” she said as she stepped in.

“Good morning to you, Celaena.” Dorian Jr. smiled broadly at her, while an older version of the lad smiled politely.

“Morning,” Dorian Sr. nodded once, and crossed his hands in front of his body.

“Dad, this is Celaena, the new exchange student I told you about.”

“It is a pleasure to meet you.”

“The pleasure is all mine.” She stood to one side, Dorian Jr. in the middle as they rode the elevator down in silence until they reached the third floor.

“Celaena,” Dorian Jr. said then, turning to her and resting a casual hand on her shoulder. “Would you like a ride today? I’m coming back to the hotel after school, so I could give you a ride both ways.” His tone was too polite, and she had to school her face not to lift her brows at him.

Dorian Sr. glanced at them so quickly, that she almost missed it, but his lips were pursed into a straight line as he looked back towards the doors.

“Sure thing, I’d love a ride.” It wasn’t necessarily true, but riding her bike had been painful, and she was curious about the way his father had reacted to the question. Dorian Sr. tensed again, making Celaena’s curiosity peak. As the elevator reached the lobby, she wrapped an arm around Dorian’s shoulders. “Let’s go,” she said, stepping out. “Nice meeting you!” She yelled over the shoulder, smiling at Dorian Sr.

Dorian Jr. held her by the waist as they stepped out of the front doors, and she took a deep breath not to flinch away from the touch. Dorian’s car was already at the door, an usher holding the door open for him. They both jumped in, and as the car left the parking lot, Dorian raised a brow at her.

“What was that about?”

“What do you mean?” She faked innocence, making Dorian roll his eyes.

“I’m a little surprised you accepted the ride to start with, but showing yourself so friendly… I know my charms, and that’s precisely how I know you’re not affected by them.”

“I have no clue what you’re talking about, prince charming, but if you don’t want my help, just say so and I’ll be back to ignoring you.” She smirked, and Dorian took a corner faster than needed, glancing at her and smiling back. With the way he was driving, she was sure they’d make it to school in time.

“So sassy, I love it. How did you know I wanted to piss off my dad?”

“I’m good at reading people.” She shrugged, trying not to give the matter too much importance. 

She knew what it was like to want to piss someone off just for the fun of it, and also to get attention. Dorian was desperate for it, desperate for any kind of attention he could get. It was so obvious, and so cliche: the boy trying to show his daddy he was good enough. Good enough to take over the business, good enough to not have to follow every step laid in front of him but to choose for himself instead. But that never worked, so they always rebelled and tried to get attention in other ways. She knew that was what she was for Dorian, even if he couldn’t see it himself. And she was going to use it to her own advantage.

“So, how about we make a deal?” Dorian asked after a moment.

“I’m listening.”

“There’s this event I need to go to next weekend, and I have a plus one. My father gave me a list of girls I should invite as good options, but I don’t like those options.”

“And you want me to be that plus one instead?” 

They reached the school’s parking lot, and Dorian killed the engine and twisted to face her. “Celaena, would you honor me with your company for the Havilliard’s annual masquerade?” he asked in a mocking tone, but she knew the proposal was real.

“What do I get in return?” she asked, crossing her arms as she faced him.

“Isn’t my amazing company enough?” Dorian took a hand to his chest dramatically, almost making her laugh.

“I wish I could say it is, but it is not.”

“I’m hurt,” Dorian said mockingly, and then jumped out of the car, and rushed to the other side. He opened the door for her and offered her a hand. Begrudgingly, she took it and stood up.

“This is still not cutting it,” she said as she closed the door behind her. “But don’t worry, I’ll think of a way for you to pay me back. Let’s just say you owe me one. Deal?”

One side of Dorian’s lips turned up in what most would have thought to be a flattering and sexy half-smile. “Deal.”

Celaena patted him twice on the shoulder as she walked past him, aware of the stares other students were giving them. “Pleasure to do business with you.”

As she walked towards the building, the eyes of the few students still outside traveled between her and Dorian, but she kept her chin high, her eyes on the door.  _ So much for not getting people’s attention for a day.  _ But it was worth it, getting closer to Dorian Sr.’s business could gain her the information she hadn’t found in his office, she wasn’t ready to give up on the search. She knew her parents and the Havilliards had had a lot of business together, and they hadn’t always seen eye to eye. Hell, Aedion and Dorian Jr. didn’t even speak to each other, so she guessed that showed things were still tense between the families.

Nehemia intercepted her as soon as she stepped through the doors, hugging her by the waist and leaning against her. Celaena flinched at the pain exploding on her side but composed herself fast enough for anybody to notice.

“What was that? You and Dorian? Tell me you spent the weekend together! I knew you were dating someone!” Nehemia was so excited, she was almost jumping as they walked.

“Chill down, everybody’s looking at us,” Celaena said in a hushed tone, and couldn’t help but laugh a little. “I ran into him at the hotel and he gave me a ride, that’s all. I haven’t seen him all weekend.”

“Then why did you ignore most of my texts? I missed you!”

The first bell rang, and Nehemia pouted as she let go of Celaena’s waist. “I told you I had family stuff on this weekend, I didn’t pay much attention to my phone, sorry.”

“Okay, let’s say I believe you. See you at lunchtime?”

“Of course.”

Nehemia marched down the hall as Celaena entered the room to her right, getting ready for a long day of school. Her ribs were still sore, and her head was starting to pound with a headache. She sat down slowly on her usual seat, the stitches on her hip pulling a bit, and looked for her phone as an alarm started blaring inside her bag.

Confused, she looked at the message popping on the screen. It wasn’t her everyday phone, but the one she used as a burner, which wasn’t password protected.

The name of the alarm read: ‘How’s our fire girl doing? Are the flames still burning up? XO Your sexy blond knight in shining armor. Text me to let me know.’ It was followed by a phone number that she didn’t recognize. Celaena covered her mouth with a hand, not knowing if she should laugh or be infuriated at the intrusion. She wasn’t sure when Fenrys could have gotten to her phone, but she guessed it was while she was in the kitchen with Connall. She knew he couldn’t have seen anything relevant, so there wasn’t a whole lot for her to worry about. 

She considered texting back for half a second, before throwing her phone back into her bag. It was better if she kept her distance, she could get whatever information she needed at the fights. She shouldn’t risk getting mixed up with the guards outside of work anymore. Especially not after knowing Lorcan Salvaterre was involved with them, that had hit too close for comfort. She didn’t have many classes with Lorcan but had seen the dark-haired guy at a few of them. He was always by himself, quietly sitting in the back of the room and not interacting with anybody.  _ Another pair of eyes to be wary of. _

The class went by painfully slow, and Celaena was relieved to stretch her muscles as the bell rang and she stood up with the rest of the class. Not even two steps towards the door, she felt her phone vibrating against her back as another alarm rang from within her bag.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me.”

She pulled it out, and read the message on the screen. ‘I knew you wouldn’t text me. Come on, I just want to make sure you're alive. PS. I know you miss me.’

She shook her head as she deleted the alarm, and checked if he had set any more while she kept walking.

Sam found her at her locker, as usual, a big smile on his face. “Hey there, how is it going?”

“Not bad.”

She dug through her books, leaving some behind and pulling some more out.

“Look at me,” Sam’s tone was suddenly serious, and she turned around slowly, dreading the look she knew she was about to see on his eyes. “What are you hiding?” Sam leaned closer and looked around the hall to make sure there weren't many people around. 

“Nothing, Sam, this is not the place and you know it.”

He reached a hand towards her face, and lifted a strand of her hair, looking at her brow. She grabbed his hand and snapped it down, frowning without thinking, which made her head hurt again.

“ _ That _ is not nothing.” Sam’s jaw was clenched as he spoke, and he had moved to a guarded stance on instinct.

“I was fighting, what did you expect?” She replied between clenched teeth.

“Celaena, I’m not stupid. You’re wearing a huge amount of makeup and I don’t want to know how many more bruises you’re hiding. This is not the result of just a fight, not your usual fight at least.”

She slammed her locker closed and started walking away, but Sam reached over and grabbed her from the shoulder, turning her around to face him. The pain that shot down her arm was so intense that she couldn’t help but flinch and step back. Sam’s eyes were full of worry as he looked her up and down, trying to assess the damage. But there was no way he could see the amount of damage; not the real one.  _ Not the one that laid within. _

“Sam, this is none of your business, just stay out of it.” She could deal with a lot of things, but she couldn’t deal with the pity in Sam’s eyes.

“Celaena, you need to let me in. You can’t do this alone.” The bell rang, and they were the only students left in the hall, only a few people lingering in the distance.

“And who says I can’t? I’ve been doing perfectly fine without you until now.”

“It can’t always be just you. One day, you’re going to have to let someone in.” Shaking his head, Sam turned around and walked towards his next class, leaving Celaena alone in the middle of the hall. 

She wanted to scream after him, or punch something.  _ How did he dare talk to her like that? _ She could do it all alone, she didn’t need anybody. As she walked towards the classroom, she pulled her burner phone out and stared at the words written there.  _ How’s our fire girl doing? _ Before she could think about it too much, she texted the number that had been given to her.

_ ‘I’m still blazing.’  _

_ ‘And I’m  _ not _ your fucking girl.’ _


	21. Breaking bonds

“You look pissed off, what happened?” Nehemia asked as she sat next to Celaena in the cafeteria at lunchtime.

“I’m fine, girl.”

Nehemia looked at her, poker-faced, and waited.

“It’s… nothing, really, I’m just tired.”

“Let me guess, you didn’t sleep too well this weekend.” She winked, and Celaena covered her mouth with a hand as she swallowed her food.

“I will repeat this one more time, I’m not seeing anyone.”

“So you’re telling me I’m imagining the hickey on your neck that you tried to conceal with makeup?” Celaena’s food got stuck on her throat, and she coughed once as she swallowed. “You did a pretty good job, but darling, I’m an expert.”

She had spent a lot of time concealing the bruises from her face, but she hadn’t paid much attention to the ones from when Cain had strangled her. Looking around the cafeteria, she made a fast decision.

“Okay, there’s a chance I spent some time with a guy this weekend,” she said begrudgingly. That was not a lie, there had been several guys after all. As if on cue, her phone vibrated, and she looked at it quickly. It was a text message from Fenrys.

‘I know you miss us, come visit whenever you’re in the neighborhood. XO’

She dropped the phone back into her bag and found Nehemia looking at her intently.

“Stop it, I will tell you soon, okay?” She needed a little while to make sure her plan could work.

Nehemia crossed her arms over her chest as she pouted. “Friends tell each other shit, you know?”

There wasn’t a whole lot she could tell Nehemia, but there was a chance she could do something to get answers for some of the questions that were going to keep on raining on her.

“Give me one minute, okay?” Celaena smiled at her only friend and stood up. She might as well just get it done and over with.

She crossed the cafeteria towards the table where Dorian was sitting and pushed an empty chair next to him. He raised his eyebrows at her as she sat down, and smiled a wicked smile.

“Missing me already?” 

She was probably going to regret her decision, but it was a good bet, it could work in her favor in many ways.

“I know what I need from you, ready to pay me back?” she whispered into his ear, making sure no one else on the table could hear them. 

Dorian’s smile grew wider, and he leaned to whisper in her ear. “And what would that be?”

Damn, she was certainly going to regret this sooner or later, but if she had read Dorian right during the last couple of weeks, she knew she could handle it, and he would be up for it. She hooked an arm around his shoulder as she leaned into his neck, and whispered against his skin.

“I need the school to think we’re dating, just for a while.”

She pulled away slowly, biting her lip as she looked at him in the eyes. Those impossibly blue eyes traveled down to her lips, and he set one hand on her thigh as he leaned forward to whisper against her neck once more. 

“I knew you wanted me, babe.” His tone was mocking, and he laughed as he pulled away. He seemed to think it over for a moment as if evaluating the pros and cons of the arrangement. 

After a minute, he nodded almost imperceptibly and then lifted a hand, holding her chin softly with two fingers. He leaned forward slowly, his eyes glued to hers as if waiting for her approval. As she blinked once, slowly, he pressed his lips gently against hers, barely touching her. “You should go finish your lunch, babe, I will catch you later.” He said the words loud enough for the whole table to hear him, and then winked at her. Celaena got up slowly, her brain all fogged up.

As she walked back to her table, she could feel all eyes on her, and hear the whispers going around the whole room. This was not ideal, but she could work with it. She could make the best of the situation, and get closer to Dorian and his father; find something useful. She knew Dorian Sr.'s businesses had been closely related to her family’s ones, and the fact that she hadn’t found anything suspicious yet, didn’t mean there wasn’t anything to be found.

As she slipped back onto her seat, Nehemia glared at her.

“So you couldn’t tell me, but you could go and make a scene in front of the whole school? I guess I really did misjudge you.” She stood up, her chair dragging loudly behind her.

“Nehemia, wait-”

“Don’t. Just… don’t.”

Nehemia walked away, and Celaena was debating following her when a bunch of girls showed at the table and sat all around her.

“Oh my God! You and Dorian?” Briar asked excitedly.

“You had it well hidden.” Lysandra quipped.

“How? When? How long have you been together? Tell us everything!”

All the cheerleaders’ voices overlapped one on top of each other as questions and more questions were thrown her way, and Celaena replied quietly with a few yes, no, and maybe. She couldn’t stop thinking about what she had done so wrong to annoy Nehemia.

***

A whole week went by, and Nehemia kept ignoring her. Celaena had tried to talk to her, but she never seemed to be around. She didn’t show up to lunch at the cafeteria and was always late to the few classes they shared and left before Celaena could approach her. 

As Tuesday rolled over, Celaena had had enough. Her bruises were pretty much healed, and she had taken out the stitches the night before. She was going back to cheerleader training that week, after claiming a bad stomach the week before and ditching in the last minute. She had been training again at Arobynn’s basement all weekend and was tired and grumpy after Arobynn had asked her a thousand questions about the fights. He had seen her training and noticed she wasn’t performing up to her usual standards and had reproached her for slacking. Sam had been there and hadn’t said a single word. They hadn’t spoken since their argument on Monday either.

“Good morning, babe,” Dorian said as he found her by her locker. He had insisted on driving her to school, but she enjoyed riding her bike too much to give out that pleasure every day, so they only rode together occasionally.

“You know, you don’t have to call me fucking babe every time you talk to me, right?”

“What should I call you then, princess?”

“Agh, you’re such a pain in my ass. Why did I get myself into this?”

“I don’t know,  _ babe _ ,” he said the last word mockingly, “because you don’t tell me a thing, so I don’t know what you are up to.”

“Because it is none of your business.”

She finished gathering her things and closed her locker. 

“Do you ever open up to anybody?” Dorian asked, hooking his arm around her waist to walk her to class as he often did.

“Not you too,” Celaena whispered, and then pushed Dorian aside and power walked her way into her first class.

She mindlessly took notes, waiting eagerly for the lunch hour, so she could go find Nehemia. She hadn’t been at the cafeteria during lunches, but Celaena thought she knew where she could find her.

When the bell rang at midday, she diverted from the crowd and headed towards the library. It only took her a moment to find Nehemia in the back, at the same table they had sat together almost a month ago. Her back was turned as she was looking out of the window, her packed lunch sitting on top of the table.

Celaena cleared her throat and ran her hands down the front of her skirt. “Nehemia.”

The girl looked over her shoulder and sighed when she saw who was addressing her. She turned back towards the window, and Celaena closed the distance between them, sitting by her side.

“Look, you can’t ignore me forever.” 

“Maybe not forever, but I can ignore you until you learn how to be a friend.” 

Celaena didn’t know how to be a friend, and she knew it wasn’t fair that she was constantly lying to the only person that had stood by her side since the very beginning, but she had missed her this week, and she was selfish, she wanted her friend back.

“Look, I’m so sorry about what I did… Maybe you’re right, maybe I don’t know how to be a good friend.” She ran her hands through her hair, she didn’t know how to do this. “But that’s because I’ve never had a real friend before.” She blurted the words out, the truth almost not making it out of her mouth.

Nehemia was silent for a moment, and when she turned to look at Celaena, there were tears in her eyes. “You know, I had a best friend once. She was… she was a caring soul, taught me so much. But she gathered with the wrong crowds, went down a bad path. She was struggling, and she didn’t tell me about it.”

Celaena listened in silence, Nehemia’s eyes filled to the brim with unshed tears as she spoke softly. “I can’t do that again, I can’t live in the dark and then be the one to deal with the consequences, with the sorrow of loss. If you’re ready to be honest, I’m here, but if you’re gonna keep spinning lies, then, please... Just go.”

Nehemia turned back to the window as a lonely tear ran down her cheek and Celaena stood up slowly, her feet rooted to the floor while she debated what to say. But what was the point? She could never be truthful to her, she could never tell her the whole truth, she couldn’t even tell her her real name. Without saying a word, she turned around and walked out of the library.

***

While entering her last class of the day, Celaena was still thinking over what Nehemia had told her. But once she sat down on her usual spot to one side of the room for AP English, she knew there were two other things for her to worry about. 

After recognizing Elide in the library four weeks ago, she had noticed the girl was -not surprisingly- part of her advanced English class. She still didn’t know how she hadn’t realized how familiar the girl looked until she had run into her. The years had been kind on Elide, and even if she tried to hide her looks behind thick-rimmed reading glasses and baggy clothes, the girl resembled her mother in many ways; which included her beauty. She was a bit short compared to Aelin’s slender figure, and had a curvy body that would be the envy of many; if they’d notice. She hid her curves under long skirts and oversized sweaters that hung a little over her wrists, almost hiding her slender fingers. Her dark hair fell on waves to her waist, framing her triangular face where a pair of beautiful light brown eyes looked curiously at the world through long natural lashes. 

Elide was sitting in the front row as always, and she turned around to give Celaena a shy smile as she sat down. The junior student had tried to approach her and convince her to join the book club a few weeks ago, and after Celaena refused her politely, she had stuck to waving and giving her shy little smiles ever since. It had been painful to watch the girl and deal with the memories that emerged every time they were in the same room. She didn’t think she’d be able to sit through a whole hour of book club; not like she had the time for it anyway.

Her second worry was sitting at the back of the room; his grey eyes rarely leaving his notebook while he mindlessly drew doodles on the page; only looking to the front every once in a while. Lorcan always lounged on his chair sitting so low, that you wouldn’t have been able to tell how tall he was just by watching him there. He never participated in class, and Celaena always made a point to be in class before him, and leave early so he wouldn’t get to look at her straight. She didn’t know how involved he was in the fights, but she could never be careful enough, so avoiding the guy at all costs had turned into a time-consuming task. 

She wasn’t sure what made her change her strategy that particular day, but as the class ended, Celaena decided to stay behind. Maybe she could follow him for a while, from behind, and from afar; see who he talked to, where he headed after class. Her fight with Nehemia was still bugging her, and she needed something, any kind of information to make her feel like she was making progress, like this whole high school ordeal was worth it.

As Lorcan walked past her, she hid behind a curtain of hair, pretending to be slowly putting away her books. Lorcan walked slowly, his shoulders slouched and his hands twitching by his sides as he neared the front of her class.

“Hey,” his voice was so low as he spoke, that Celeana could barely hear him.

“Hi, Lorcan,” Elide’s sweet voice traveled to her with no issue, the girl smiling broadly as she looked up to the guy towering ridiculously over her. “Did you finish the book?”

“I did.” Lorcan’s right hand was playing with the strap of his backpack as he ran the other through his hair. _ Was he nervous? _

“I loved the ending, did you?” Elide finished putting her books away in her bag as she spoke, and slung it over a shoulder.

“I thought it was… an interesting twist of events.” 

“I can’t wait to discuss it tomorrow.”

Lorcan nodded as a half-smile curved his lips up. “Yeah, same.”

As Elide rounded her desk and headed towards the door, Lorcan followed behind her, his slouched shoulders not helping in any way to the height difference. 

“See you tomorrow,” Elide smiled as she looked back at him, and Celaena could have sworn Lorcan was blushing lightly; but that was impossible. 

“See you, Elide.”

The way he said her name, made Celaena feel almost uncomfortable to be listening to their conversation. As Elide disappeared down the hall, and Lorcan headed the other way towards a nearby locker, Celaena tried to convince herself that this wasn’t her problem. It was not her place to protect Elide, she didn’t owe the girl anything.

Still, as she walked out of the school and towards her bike, she pulled out her phone and typed Lorcan’s name onto the school’s database.


	22. Sinking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! I hate to have to say this, but life has been more than I could handle lately which means I haven't advanced with this story as much as I'd like to :(  
> From today on, I will update only ONCE A WEEK, every Saturday, hoping that this way I won't have to completely stop uploading at any point.   
> Thank you so much to all my faithful readers that have been leaving so many beautiful and encouraging comments! :D I promise I won't stop writing Fireheart, I only need a little extra time to catch up with it n_n

“That was not the deal!” Dorian crossed his arms over his chest, clearly annoyed.

“Well, I said I was going to the party with you, I never said anything about how long I was going to be there for.”

“You’ll miss out on the best part! After the boring but delicious dinner and speeches, that’s when the dancing and drinking starts. If you leave early, who am I to dance with?”

“Well, that is not my problem, is it? I will go to dinner this Saturday as promised, but after that, I will be gone.”

“And you won’t even tell me why or where you’re going.”

“Exactly. Now please, it’s Friday night, I have things to do and places to be, so if you may.” Celaena gestured with her hands for Dorian to move along, but he shook his head.

“You can’t just-” She slammed the door shut on his face, and walked towards her room as she heard Dorian cursing out loud in the hall.

Celaena slumped on the bed and covered her face with a pillow. She had 24 hours left until the next fight, and she knew she should head to the mansion for some training, but she couldn’t get herself to do it. After tossing and turning in bed for a while, she decided to go out. She put on a pair of jeans, her black leather jacket and headed out on her motorbike.

She drove around town for a while, not knowing where she was going, trying not to think about anything, but thinking too much about everything instead. When she turned towards the outskirts, she finally realized what she needed, where she was headed. 

It had been long since the last time she had visited.

Celaena parked her bike in an alley and walked a few meters towards the water. She sat down by the shore, the water getting so close that it was almost touching the tips of her boots. It was the spot where she had washed ashore; where Arobynn had found her. She couldn’t remember much about the moment, but she had made Arobynn take her there a few years after she was found, and had come back several times ever since.

There was no other way for her to be close to her parents. Their remains had been returned to Terrasen, and she hadn’t been back there; ever. And sometimes, she even wondered if she’d ever go back.

“Hey, mum,” she said quietly into the night. “Hi, dad. I’m sorry it’s been a while, life hasn’t been particularly easy.” She knew they couldn’t hear her, but she had spoken to them so many times as a child, it was almost like thinking out loud. “I promised you I’d find who did this to you, and I assure you I’m working on it… I’m going to avenge you. I just… I just don’t know if I know how to do this. I have a plan, I do. But I feel like I keep running into dead ends, and the lies keep piling up... I’m afraid I don’t know who I am anymore.”

She sat in silence for minutes, contemplating the water, listening to the soothing sound of the waves crashing, and watching as the stars started shining brighter in the sky and reflecting on the surface. She had lost the only friend she had ever had, she wasn’t speaking with Sam, and she was fake dating a guy she didn’t even trust.

“How am I supposed to run the business after all this is over if I don’t even know who I am?”

Celaena grabbed a rock from the shore and threw it into the water.

“How will I run it, when all I’ve ever done is fight?”

She grabbed another rock, spun it between her fingers, and threw it as hard as she could. She watched the water rippling for long, listening to the water, the wind, and the crickets chirping in the distance.

“I don’t even know who I am.” The words seem to be stuck in her head, consuming her with doubt. She heard the steps behind her before the familiar voice replied.

“I know who you are, and I’d be happy to remind you if you let me.” Sam showed up by her side, extending a hand towards her to help her to her feet. She looked at it for a while before taking it begrudgingly.

“What are you doing here?”

“I come here sometimes,” Sam’s voice was soft but certain.

“What for?” She raised a single eyebrow at him.

“As a reminder… I have nothing left of my past, of my parents, or who I was. But I know who I am now, and a lot of it, a lot of me, began the day Arobynn brought you to the house. I come here to think, same as you do.”

Sam pointed with his head to the side and started walking slowly along the shore. Celaena followed him, letting the silence between them settle into a calm and pleasant feeling while she thought about Sam’s words.

“I’m not sure about anything anymore.” It was the biggest truth she had spoken in a while. “Who am I? I am not Celaena, I am not Aelin anymore, and I don’t think I can stand up to the Fireheart title either.” She paused for a second before dropping the second painful truth. “They beat me up, Sam.” Her voice almost cracked admitting it out loud, and she had to swallow hard. “I won the fight, but they came after me... I barely made it out. I feel like a fraud.”

Sam looked at her as he kept walking, his eyes traveling to her brow, which was now healed, and then back to her blue eyes. He had known something was wrong, but he couldn’t hide the surprise when hearing her words.

“I’ve missed those eyes, you know,” he said after a while, surprising her by the change of subject. “Not that brown doesn’t suit you, everything does, but the darkness in those eyes… Sometimes I forget about the light that shines within, and I think you do too.”

“What are you even talking about, Sam?” He wasn’t making sense, and she was already getting annoyed at him. She had laid out the biggest truth, had opened up in a way she hadn’t done in years, and Sam was talking nonsense instead of acknowledging what she had told him.

“I’m sorry you got beaten up, and I’m here to talk about it if you want. I can only imagine how frustrated you might feel. After all, you are a fighter, and losing is not something you’re used to. But you are still here, still showing up, still fighting. You might be hiding behind those dark eyes on the daily, but the light that shines within is still there.” Sam looked up to the sky and the almost full moon, lost in thought for a moment while she waited for him to finish talking. “You are Celaena, as much as you are Aelin, and you are also Fireheart. Names are not important, names do not define us. You are not the name, but the person that wields it. You are Celaena, because you are that girl that’s showing up at school and making friends, the girl that joined the cheerleader team and is kicking ass in practice. You are also Fireheart, I don’t doubt that for a second. You are fierce, and you have a passion inside of you that burns so bright, you could light up the whole world if you wanted to.” Sam stopped walking and turned around to look at her, the silver moon making his eyes look bright as he held her gaze.

“Sam, you don’t… you can’t-”

“Don’t you dare say I don’t know you. You can try and hate me all you want, but I can read you better than you can read yourself, Aelin. Because you are Aelin too. You are still that fragile girl that I met so many years ago, and that’s what terrifies you. You are scared of being vulnerable, and that’s why you keep pushing me away. But I won’t back down. I’m here for you, like it or not, and you need to eventually let someone in. I don’t care if that someone is me, or someone else.”

Sam’s hands had traveled to Celaena’s shoulders, and he was holding her at arm’s length, looking intently into her eyes. She looked down, thinking about the past. About how every time she had fought against Sam, he had still been there, silently by her side. How he had been there the first few nights when she woke up screaming, the nightmares haunting her. He had learned how to fight by her side, and always pushed her to be better, to fight as an equal, and not treated her differently for being a girl.

“What happened that night?” She hadn’t let him explain himself and had always believed he had betrayed her out of jealousy or mistrust. Celaena didn’t know if it was all she had lost in the last week, or the uncertainty after being so close to losing everything, but she was finally ready to listen to Sam, to hear his side of the story.

“I’ve been waiting for you to ask this for so long, to give me a chance to explain.” He let go of her shoulders, and ran a hand through his hair, looking up into the sky again. “I will never forgive myself for it. I didn’t know what you were up to… I knew you had been keeping a little extra money here and there, don’t look at me like that,” he said as Celaena raised a brow at him. “We worked closely, and you know I pay attention, I knew you’d been stealing from Arobynn for months.”

“Why didn’t you rat me out?”

“Because I didn’t know why you were stealing, and why would I, anyway?”

“You don’t want to know what I wanted the money for?” Celaena started walking again, and Sam followed her as they walked back along the shoreline.

“I do, and you know I won’t tell a soul if you decide to share it with me. I’m done being Arobynn’s spy, I mean it.”

She considered the answer for a long moment before replying. “I wanted to hire a private investigator.”

“To look for your parents,” Sam added.

“And to find whatever I could on Arobynn... To take him down.”

“What?” Sam stopped walking altogether and took a step back. “Are you crazy? Why? No, oh, no, no, why are you even telling me this?”

That was a good question, and one she didn’t think she was ready to answer just yet. “You know he owns us, and even if I get my family’s company back, Arobynn will still own my life, he will be able to get money out of me for the rest of my life with the secrets he knows. I will not be able to rest, even if I get my way. You know that. But that’s enough about my motives, I want yours.”

Sam was shaking his head, one hand furiously scratching the back of his head and messing his hair even more. Celaena kept walking, not waiting to see if he’d follow or not, she knew he would eventually.

“Okay, fuck,” he trotted over to catch up and walked by her side. “That night when you disappeared, I thought the worst. It was just after we had done that raid in the big mansion, and I thought security might have found a trail on us. I went around looking for you, and when I couldn’t find you anywhere, I panicked. Arobynn found me pacing around in your room, waiting to see if you’d show up. I had found your stash, and it was lying on top of your bed when Arobynn walked in.”

Celeana slowed down and headed towards the shore, stopping so close that the water was licking the soles of her boots. Sam stood by her side, his hands in his pockets as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

“So he found you there, my stash on the bed… And you told him everything.”

Sam looked down, and kicked the rocks and the sand, making the water ripple around them and splash their boots.

“No,” his voice was almost a murmur, but they were standing so close together, she could hear him perfectly. “I… I told him the money was mine.”

Celaena looked up at him, his profile a perfect silhouette being drawn against the moon behind him. “You did what?” There was no way she had heard that right, why would’ve Sam defended her like that?

“I’ve known him for longer than you, Aelin, and I’ve seen the darkest sides of Arobynn. He will only show you what he wants you to see, and he has always wanted you to see the good parts of him. He wanted you to think he was caring, and that’s why he’s always giving you gifts. All he ever gave me was discipline and punishments, and I was scared of what he might do to you for stealing, so I lied.”

Silence took over as all Celaena could do was look at the man standing in front of her. The boy she had grown up with, the one she had always pushed away, and the same one that had tried to help her all along. She knew now that side of Arobynn Sam was talking about, she had suffered it that awful night, when everything for her had changed.

“Why? Why did you care? I tried so hard to push you, and you-”

“Aelin,” Sam turned around to face her and reached over to hold her hands. His hands were warm against her skin, and she almost pulled away, but Sam’s eyes were so intense, that she couldn’t do it. “We have grown up together, and it doesn’t matter how hard you try to push me away, I will always be there, because-”

“Sam, don’t-”

“No, you fucking listen to me, I’m done with pretending I don’t give a shit and letting you hurt my feelings over and over again. I love you, Aelin.”

Celaena stepped back, getting her hands off Sam’s as fast as she could. No, he didn’t, he couldn’t, she couldn’t deal with that.

Sam started laughing, a relaxed and genuine laugh that was so inappropriate for the situation, that it almost made Celaena laugh as well.

“For fucks sake,” he said when he finally stopped. “You are so scared of people caring about you, that it makes you so blind to so many things.” Sam was shaking his head, and Celaena was lost for words, not having any idea of what was going on anymore. “I love you like a sister, Aelin. You are the family I never had, the one I always wished I could have. And just like any brother would, I sometimes want to kill you and punch you in the gut for being so stubborn and a pain in my ass; but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you, or that I wouldn’t do anything for you. You are my only family.”

He had always been there, he had stood up for her, tried to defend her, to take the blame for her mistakes. Sam was like the brother she never had.

“Sam…” 

She had always known it, but had denied her feelings for so long, so scared that caring for him would mean losing him the same way she had lost her parents and everyone else she had ever cared for. But how could she keep running away from him, when he was opening up his heart right in front of her?

“You don’t need to say it back, I know you care for me in your own twisted and fucked up way. And I’ll say it one last time, I’m not going anywhere.”

Going against everything Celaena had ever trained for, every instinct she had learned to develop to survive, and every impulse of running away she felt, she closed the distance between them and laced her arms around Sam’s neck.

As Sam hugged her back, Celaena told herself she was Celaena, but also Aelin. That girl hadn’t completely died that night she washed ashore, and she could still be her when needed, she could still rely on her every once in a while.

“If you ever tell anyone about this, Cortland,” she said as she squeezed him hard and then let go of him altogether. “I will chop off your balls and serve them to Arobynn on a silver platter.”

Sam laughed out loud, a beautiful and heartfelt laugh that filled the space between them, making Aelin laugh with him.

“I wouldn’t doubt that for a second.”


	23. Owning the title

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, how I've missed updating this story! <3  
> I'm so excited about these new chapters coming up, I hope you love them as much as I do!   
> The next chapter is ready and pending editing, so it will be up next Thursday :D  
> Cross your fingers so my inspiration keeps up with my desires so I can write a few more chapters this week n_n

As Aelin got her gown out of the plastic bag from the dry cleaners, she found herself still thinking about the night before. She had stayed with Sam at the beach long into the night, and they had talked about the past few years, about everything they knew about Arobynn and their secret dreams of wishing he was out of the picture.

Sam explained he wasn’t scared about himself, but about her when he had made the deal with Arobynn; and after a lot of convincing, Sam had agreed to stop passing information to him, and only give him the information they would agree on. He also told her Arobynn had been oddly distant, traveling all the time and having secret meetings Sam wasn’t invited to. 

Aelin had even confided in Sam that she was gutted to have lost Nehemia and that it sucked not to be able to be herself with people. She was tired of lying and hiding all the time, and Sam was the only other person who could understand that. But what other option did she have? He had suggested for her to try again, to give Nehemia the chance to get closer, to get a glimpse of the real Aelin, and she had almost told him to fuck off for it. But she had promised herself to try and be the sister Sam had always seen her as, so she had just punched him in the shoulder for being obnoxious and unrealistic instead. 

She had woken up that morning feeling so much lighter, so relieved to have let such a huge weight off her shoulders. She might have fucked things up with Nehemia, but at least she had Sam back. 

A knock on the door startled her, and she went to open up.

“Since when do you knock?” She raised her brows at Sam and made sure her dressing gown was properly closed.

“Well, after our chat last night, I thought you’ve earned it.”

“You’re such a weirdo, Cortland. Come in before anybody sees you lurking around.”

She pushed Sam into the room and closed the door behind him.

“Everything good and ready for tonight?”

“Actually, I heard Arobynn talking on the phone today,” Sam said as he followed her into the bedroom. “And he’s going to that gala.”

Celaena turned around swiftly. “He, what?”

“I think he’s someone’s plus one, but I’m not sure I got that right. I just thought you ought to know.”

“Well, that sucks.”

She paced up and down the room, considering what she could do about it. Did it change anything?

“It’s a masquerade though, isn’t it? He might not even recognize you.”

“No chance of that,” she said, showing him the dress she was about to put on. “It’s one of the dresses he gifted me, and I was going to wear Fireheart’s mask because it matches it perfectly. He will know it’s me.”

The dress was a red long gown, with a low V neck that went down almost to her navel and a closed-back, all embroidered with silver and gold stones. It had short sleeves that hugged her shoulders nicely, a tight bodice that accentuated her curves, and a flowy skirt that seemed to dance around her every time she walked.

“Well, you have an excuse to be there, it’s not a big deal. I just wanted you to be mentally prepared to run into him.” Sam grabbed the dress off her hands and took it out of the hanger. He ran his fingers across the stones in the back and started opening up the hidden zip on the side. “What shoes are you wearing?”

Feeling a bit weirded out, Celaena grabbed the shoes off the side of the bed and lifted them for Sam to see them. They were high heels that wrapped up halfway through her calves.

“You’re going to give Dorian a heart attack,” Sam said laughingly. “Want a hand getting into it?” he asked as he passed her the gown.

“Oh, fuck off, Cortland, we’re not that kind of friends!” She set the gown down on the bed and started pushing Sam out of the room. “Now, come on, get out of here, I need to get ready.”

“We could be that kind of friends, you know.”

“Out, now!”

Sam laughed out loud as he was shoved all the way down the hall, and walked the rest of the way towards the front door. He grabbed the duffel bag by the entrance and turned around to smile at her before heading out the door.

“See you later!” he chanted as he closed the door between them.

“Fuck sakes, I give him a fingertip and he grabs my whole damn arm.” Celaena walked back to her room biting her lip, the laughter stuck on her chest as she tried too hard to keep it down.

An hour later, she walked down the hall, hit the call down button, and jumped into an empty elevator. When the doors opened up at the lobby, Dorian was already waiting for her, leaning against the front desk casually while talking with one of the receptionists. As she walked out, he straightened up and walked over, meeting her in the middle of the lobby.

“Wow,” he said as he offered her an arm. “You look stunning tonight, not like you don’t usually look stunning.”

“Thanks.” She hooked her elbow on his, and they turned towards the exit. “You look pretty okay yourself.”

“Okay? Wouldn’t you say… dazzling? Marvelous? Splendid?” He smiled broadly at her, and Celaena stifled a laugh.

“I’ll stick with okay.” 

It was a lie, Dorian was wearing a dark blue tuxedo with a red bowtie that matched her dress perfectly, and he did look indeed dazzling. He had a dark blue mask that covered only his eyes, making them seem a lighter shade of blue if that was even possible. They would have matched so much better if Celaena wasn’t wearing those damned contact lenses. His dark hair was the perfect contrast to her ash-blond curls, and as she caught a glimpse of themselves in the mirror by the entrance, she realized heads would be turning their way all night... And there was no way Arobynn wouldn’t notice her.

They rode alone in a limousine, Dorian trying to make small talk and convince her to stay till later the whole time. Walking into the venue, heads did turn their way, and Dorian greeted absolutely everybody, introducing her to other businessmen, female entrepreneurs, and even a few family members. He was polite and kind to everybody, and Celaena was surprised to see a side of him she hadn’t seen at school. 

The stuck-up guy was gone, and a more formal but caring Dorian was showing instead.

“Celaena, would you like a drink before we head towards the dining room?” he asked her once they had greeted everybody.

“Uhm, sure, just a glass of water would be fine.”

“Really?” He scowled.

“Yes, that’s all I want for now. Get them to pour it in a flute if it makes you happier. You can even make it sparkling water. Fancier, you know.”

Dorian shook his head before walking away and leaving her in the middle of the room by herself. She shouldn’t have been surprised that Arobynn found his way to her side as fast as he did once Dorian was gone.

“Funny to see you here,” he whispered into her ear, casually standing next to her with a drink in his hand. 

“I could say the same,” she replied politely.

“Shouldn’t you be getting ready for a fight? I have a lot of money on tonight,” he said as he looked to the front, pretending he wasn’t talking to her.

“Don’t worry, you won’t lose a dime.” She brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, glancing at him sideways. 

Arobynn was wearing a black tuxedo with a black shirt and black bowtie. He was freshly shaved, and his hair was shorter than the last time she had seen him, which meant he was probably trying to impress someone; but who?

“Let’s just hope things don’t go sour like last time.”

Celaena turned to look at him nimbly, but Arobynn was already walking away, getting lost between the crowd.

“Are you okay?” Dorian asked, reaching her at that moment, and passing her a flute of sparkling water with a slice of lemon inside. “Looks like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Yes, fine. Let’s go find our table, my feet are sore already.”

“Sure thing, this way.”

Dorian guided her between the crowd, saying a few words here and there to people she didn’t pay any attention to. Plates came and went, and she cut food up and shoved it into her mouth without really tasting it. She said her piece when people talked to her, and stared at the stage as strangers gave out speeches. But the whole time, Arobynn’s words were playing back in her mind.

Sam couldn’t have told him anything; Sam hadn’t even known.

And Arobynn had acted like he didn’t know anything about it during the weekend, so what had changed? Had anything even changed, or was Arobynn playing with her? He was seated on a table towards the back, and she could barely see his figure from so far away. She had glanced his way a few times, but all she could see was his profile, and the long dark hair from the lady sitting next to him.

Once the time for her to leave came, she purposely walked past his table and caught the lady as she was standing up and walking out of the room. She was wearing a silver gown that hugged her curves nicely and watching her from behind, she could have been anywhere between 20 and 40 years old. Celaena tried to follow the woman but lost her in the lobby as she walked into the women's bathroom. She considered going into the bathroom for a fraction of a second, but she was running out of time and she couldn’t afford to be late. 

She walked out of the venue and found her motorbike parked at the back, where Sam had left it for her. She lifted the seat and pulled out her black leggings, then put them on under the dress, and folded the dress up as much as she could manage. She closed her jacket over the dress covering most of it and pulled her hair up in a low ponytail. She rode over to the fighting pit, where Sam would be waiting for her with the full change of clothes. At least, she already had her mask on and didn’t need to worry about makeup or hiding her identity any further. 

The Fossa was already packed when she arrived, and the crowd was going wild. Celaena nodded at Connall as she walked through the back door, who barely nodded back. She didn’t see either Rowan nor Fenrys as she made her way to the backroom; not like she was looking for them anyway.

Sam handed her the duffle bag as soon as she walked in and she sneaked into the changing rooms. Luckily, there was a women’s changing room that was always empty, where she got rid of the dress and put on a short-sleeved red top. She was done with black, she was out of the shadows, she was fire, and she would live up to the name.

“Ready?” Sam asked as she walked back into the room and scanned the small crowd. To her surprise -and delight- Cain was nowhere to be seen.

“Always.” 

“Good, because I think you’re up first.”

“Great. By the way, the mask suits you.” She laughed at Sam’s annoyed look; the black mask was similar to hers and looked hilarious on Sam. But it was a necessary measure now that they knew someone from school was lurking around the pits too. If Lorcan recognized either of them, they could potentially get into a lot of shit. It was better if neither of them could be traced back to the school and stayed anonymous. The masks didn’t conceal the whole of their faces, but it was enough to make them harder to recognize to strangers. Or so she hoped.

Fenrys poked into the back room as Celaena was still laughing at Sam’s expression, and looked straight at her with a serious look on his eyes. 

“Fireheart, you’re up.” He turned his gaze towards Sam for a moment, and then turned around and was out of the room. She followed him out, and they walked the short hall towards the stage.

“Missed me?” Fenrys whisper-yelled as they walked, the crowd roaring around them.

“Not at all.” She kept her eyes on the stage, her chin up, not looking at the crowd.

“Was that your mysterious boyfriend?”

“None of your business.”

“So sassy, I love it. Good luck, girl.”

They reached the stage, and she looked at him for a fraction of a second. “I’m not your girl, and I don’t need luck.” She finished with a wink and jumped onto the platform. 

While her rival jumped onto the stage too, she looked around the crowd quickly. No woman was lurking in the shadows, and there was no sign of Rowan anywhere around the venue either. She spotted Lorcan far away, minding the crowd close to the customer’s entrance; and then the fight started.

She was back to her usual self, and she felt fast and confident as she danced around the stage, giving the crowd the show they had paid for. After the suffering she had endured after the last fight, she wasn’t looking for a clean and quick fight, she was eager to get her hands dirty, to make someone suffer. She was merciless, she was ash, and smoke, and embers. She was blazing, and no one could beat her. Fireheart punched and kicked, sidestepped and twirled, blocked and jabbed. She was unstoppable, and by the time the fight was over, there wasn’t a single new bruise on her body.

“That was impressive,” Fenrys said as she jumped down, the crowd roaring so loud that she could barely hear him. She scoffed as she walked right past him, and kept walking towards the back room.

“I was just warming up.”


	24. Surprises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't going to update till tomorrow, but I'm an anxious being, and the chapter is ready, and I love it, so I thought... why not? Might as well uploaded and hope someone else can fall in love with this as much as me n_n  
> Btw, thank you @fleetingpieces as always for proofreading my work and making sure everything makes sense as it does in my head lol xD

By the time Rowan got to the Fossa, that night’s tournament was mostly over. He could have gone home, could have been lying on his couch drinking a cold beer and watching a game of whatever sport might have been on TV. But instead, Rowan decided to head to the fights. To see it with his own eyes, to make sure he didn’t make a mistake… Not like he could have mistaken her.

“Didn’t think you were rostered tonight,” Lorcan said as Rowan stepped through the main door, not wanting to use the back alley.

“I’m not,” he said matter-of-factly.

“Then why are you here?” 

“That is none of your concern, kid,” he almost spat the words, looking down at Lorcan and then walking away without a second look. 

He didn’t want to be rude, but he had an appearance to keep, and the kid had a lot of lessons to learn if he wanted to survive the Fossa. Lorcan was pushing his luck and stepping out of line, which was dangerous in their line of work. The place had no space for weakness, no room for doubt, and certainly no patience for curious people that got their noses where they shouldn’t. That’s how you could get yourself killed, or worse.

The gymnasium was loud, and it smelled of stale beer and sweat. The dampness of the room clung to his skin, and Rowan folded the cuffs of his black shirt up, his jacket already away in his motorbike’s storage compartment. Reaching the edge of the room, he found a spot where he could watch the whole comings and goings of the place. It was not one of the spots where security was normally posted, but one he had found after endless nights working there. 

Connal was stationed to one side of the made-up stage, minding the crowd, and Rowan could see Fenrys by the side, watching the fight closely. He didn’t recognize either of the fighters, but that was no surprise, he never paid much attention to them unless they were regulars. The fight finished up a few minutes later, and Fenrys escorted the winner to the backroom. The whole place roared with claps and cheers, and he saw a few bills slipping from hand to hand. 

Betting at the fights was allowed in any kind or form. Bigger bets were made with Maeve herself, as she was the one that organized the events, but she always said a little under-the-table betting helped to spice things up. Whoever had been working long enough for her knew the truth behind that statement. All of the bets were run by her.  _ All of them _ . Nothing in the pits went unnoticed by Maeve, which was half the reason Rowan had gone to the Fossa that night.

_ There was no way Maeve didn’t know _ .

But even if she knew, what did it all mean?

As Fenrys walked the next fighter over to the stage, Rowan walked by his side, mostly unnoticed between the crowd, and gave him one quick nod. Immediately after, he darted to the back, but instead of heading into the fighter’s backroom, he went into the office next to it and waited.

“What are you doing here, mate?” Fenrys greeted him as he walked into the office and closed the door.

“Did you get someone to take your place?” 

“Yeah, I got Con, I have five minutes or so, what’s up?”

“Maybe nothing, maybe a lot,” Rowan replied thoughtfully.

“Cut it to the point mate,” Fenrys said, his expression going a little serious despite the grin.

“Is… Fireheart here tonight?” Rowan dropped his voice to a whisper, even if he knew no one could hear them there.

“Yeah, why?” Fenrys smirked.

“I was at the gala with Maeve tonight, as his escort,” Rowan started. “And I saw her there,” Rowan dropped his voice even more, just to be cautious. “I mean, it had to be her, she was even wearing the same mask.”

“Oh, wow, okay,” Fenrys scratched the back of his neck, and then his smile widened as he looked at Rowan again. “Did she look gorgeous in a ball gown?” He said in a dreamy and mocking tone.

“Fenrys! That’s not the fucking point!”

“Weird, she didn’t tell me she saw you there, I thought we were friends now… Thought she’d share something like that with me…” He put a hand over his heart in mock offense, his expression turning into one of fake utter-disbelief. 

“For fucks sake Fenrys, can you be serious for a second? She didn’t even see me.”

“Did you hide?” Fenrys’ eyebrow lifted playfully, and he punched Rowan on the shoulder.

“Fenrys, please. This is serious. She was there as Dorian Havilliard Jr.’s date. So, yeah, I might have made an effort to stay out of her sight.”

At the news, Fenry’s smile dropped and he looked down, scratching the back of his neck again. 

“And here I thought the kid she was with today was her boyfriend. I should have known better, he seems gay,” he said, speaking mostly to himself.

“What are you talking about?”

“She brought a companion today, a cute kid with gentle eyes hiding behind a black lace mask. I think he’s the one that was here with her the first night.”

“Can we go back to the point? Who cares if she’s here with someone?” But as he said the words, Rowan realized he was already planning on popping his head on the back to look at this kid. “So, I’m thinking, she either goes to school with Havilliard, or she’s from one of the wealthy families in town. Either way, she’s wealthy. She needs to be if she goes to school with him, so my question is… What is she doing here? She can’t be here for the prize. What if she’s one of Maeve’s spies? She was in our home, what if she was looking for something?”

“Maybe she enjoys the fighting too much, maybe she’s rebelling against her parents and just thinks having a double life is fun.”

“Do you even listen to yourself?”

“What?!” Fenrys lifts his arms in surrender, his confused expression getting on Rowan’s nerves. “She didn’t go to our home, I took her there because she was dying, do I need to remind you that?”

“I told you she was trouble, and this proves it,” Rowan replied, not even listening to Fenrys anymore. Maybe it had all been staged, all to set them up, to test their loyalties.

“This proves, what? That she goes to school? We already knew that! A lot of people around here do.”

_ A lot of people _ … like the Salvaterre kid. Could any of it be related? All of it?

“Doesn’t Lorcan go to school with Dorian?” Rowan asked, and Fenrys looked taken aback by the change of subject.

“Why would I know which school he goes to?”

“Because you hired him.”

“True that, let me think… I think it was something with… Adarlan…”

“Half the schools here are called something ‘Adarlan’, Fenrys!”

“You have no fucking patience, mate! I think it was something fancy… like…”

“Like Adarlan Elite High?” Rowan asked, squaring his shoulders while trying to find the connection.

“Yes! That one! How did you know?”

“Because that’s the school Havilliard goes to.”

“And you know that because…” 

“Because unlike you, I take this job seriously, and…” Rowan dropped his voice again, “and I keep a close eye on Maeve, and the Havilliards are important to her business.”

Fenrys looked at his watch, and then back up at Rowan, a worried expression on his face.

“I need to go back,” he said as the crowd’s cheers grew louder outside. “Please, don’t do anything stupid, this probably means nothing. I mean, she’s that rich kid’s girlfriend, so what? It doesn’t change a thing. Now, that girl we’re talking about is about to jump on stage, so I better go... Oh, by the way, do you need a lift home?”

“Nah, I’ve got my bike.”

With a simple nod, Fenrys walked out of the office and Rowan moved to stand by the door, watching him walk into the back room and come back out followed by the blond fighter. He told himself he should go, but he was rooted to the spot, watching Fireheart walk towards the stage, her chin held high as the crowd around her went wild. 

Everybody was on their feet, clapping, yelling, chanting.

“Fireheart, Fireheart, Fireheart.”

Rowan couldn’t say he was surprised, it was not common to see a girl on the Fossa, and Celaena was certainly putting up a show. She had been reckless the first night, ending her fights too fast, but since having an audience, her style had changed. At that moment, the way she walked, seeming so sure of herself, he could picture every man on her wake dropping to their feet, serving themselves up on silver platters. She had them all eating from her palm.

He turned to the side, and there he was. Tall, lean, and with a black lace mask over his face. The guy was smiling up at Celaena, his eyes following her every move with something that looked almost like devotion. He couldn’t say he remembered him from the first round of fights, even if he barely recalled Fireheart being there with someone, but he surely hadn’t had a mask on. 

Rowan turned back to the stage in time to see Celaena jumping up, her rival being one of the few regulars he recognized. His name was Zhek, and he had been one of the finalists the previous year. The girl moved along the stage with grace, her every movement feeling like a piece of a well-practiced dance. She ducked, twirled, rolled on the floor, and jumped to her feet with the grace of a ballerina. But she also punched, kicked, and struck Zhek over and over again, her every attack hitting its target with a precision that had Rowan mesmerized. 

She was no ballerina, she was a ruthless fighter. 

He had seen many fights in his life, but he had never seen anything like her. As Celaena ducked again, then threw a high kick and knocked her opponent, he understood the meaning of her fighting name.

_ Fireheart. _

The girl’s heart burned bright with flames. She was not only fire, but ash, and smoke, and blazing light. He had never seen anybody fight with so much passion and determination.

_ Fireheart, who are you? And what do you want? _

***

“Can I borrow your car for a little while?” Rowan asked on Monday morning.

“What’s wrong with your motorbike?” 

“Nothing, it’s just that… I’d rather use the car.”

Fenrys dropped his spoon on his cereal bowl loudly and looked up at Rowan, a cress between his brows.

“Mate, what are you up to? Don’t tell me you’re about to do something stupid?”

“I’m not telling you then,” he said nonchalantly. “Do you need the car or not?”

“No… I don’t.”

“Sweet,” Rowan grabbed the keys from the kitchen counter and strolled purposely towards the door.

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” Fenrys yelled after him.

Rowan drove slowly, trying not to draw attention. He had the tinted windows up, and he rolled into the parking lot casually, following the line of cars as if he was there every morning. He was early, so there weren’t a whole lot of people around. He parked around the back, as far away from the main doors as possible, and he waited while he sipped on a cup of coffee.

About five minutes later, the car he was waiting for drove in, and he leaned forward, his coffee forgotten for a moment. The car parked right in front of the main door, and the driver’s door opened up. A tall kid with dark raven hair that he recognized as Havillard Jr. stepped out, and then he circled the car, opening up the passenger door. He reached a hand down, and Rowan watched flabbergasted as a delicate hand clasped it and a long pale leg stretched out, heels too high to be school-appropriate hitting the floor. 

Celaena got out of the car like a celebrity, her long legs being followed by a pleated grey skirt that revealed a whole lot of skin, and then a white snug shirt and a curtain of perfect golden curls. She shook her head once, fanning her hair, and then the rich kid closed the door, leaning unnecessarily close, and laced an arm around Celaena’s waist as they walked together towards the school.

Rowan took the last sip of his coffee, scrunched the paper cup in his fist, and threw it over to the passenger seat. His eyes were still on the retreating couple, which is why he jumped up as a loud knock sounded on his window.

The girl standing by the car with her arms crossed over her chest had to be an illusion. 

Rowan cleared his throat and rubbed his eyes, looking over at the girl again, who, annoyed at the waiting, knocked on the window again and motioned for him to roll it down. He lowered it slowly as the darkest set of eyes he had ever seen stared back at him, making his heart race at the thousand suppressed memories.

“What are you doing here?” the girl asked, sounding more surprised than angry. 

Her hair had grown so long since the last time he had seen her, and instead of being a puffy mane, it was now tamed into long but uneven dreads, some of them with golden rings around them. But the rest of her... It was the same face he had seen so many times, even if mostly in pictures.

“Nehemia,” he let her name out in a single breath, almost like a curse, or like a plea. Like a forgotten and buried memory he never thought he’d had to deal with again.

“I knew it was you the second I saw you… It’s been a long time, Rowan.” There was sadness in her tone, her voice almost breaking as she said his name.

“Do you go to school here?” Rowan found himself asking, the thousand coincidences starting to prickle his skin and make his gut churn. Or maybe those were the memories, relighting the fire in his soul. 

“I do… And you don’t. As far as I remember, you finished school four years ago. What are you doing here? I thought you might have been looking for me, but you seem utterly surprised to find me here.”

“I was… No… I didn’t know you came here… I was… It’s work-related,” he managed to let out.

“Still in the same line of work?” Nehemia asked, her lips turning into an upside smile.

“I think you know the answer to that,” he replied, shrugging with one shoulder.

“I thought so…” Nehemia looked to both sides, and then rushed around the car.

She jumped into the passenger seat, knocking the discarded cup onto the floor of the car, and shut the door with a loud bang behind her.

“We need to talk, and it’s probably best if we don’t do it here,” she said, her words rushed in through harsh whispers.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea…”

“Rowan,” Nehemia’s eyes were pleading, unshed tears lining up on her eyes. “Please, I need your help.”

Rowan swallowed hard, and before he could regret his decision, he stepped onto the gas and drove out of Adarlan Elite High’s parking lot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! I appreciate everybody's support so much! Btw, I started a Tumblr account! It was about time haha And I will be updating some avatars from all the characters of this fic <3 along with a lot or random things most likely xD  
> Find me here: https://knittingdreams.tumblr.com/


	25. Hacking triplets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So, I know I'm being super irregular with these updates! But I promised at least an update every week... and I'm kind of anxious and can't wait the whole week if the chapter is ready, so, instead of having a set day, I will only tell you that I promise there will never be more than 7 days between updates xD It can be 5 days, 3 days, or even 2, who knows!   
> This story just turned into a surprise box! LOL xD  
> So, let's indulge in an exciting chapter where... guess what?? New characters show up!!! Because it's never too late to introduce characters you love lol <3  
> I've been trying to introduce these characters for way too long, and I finally had a chance to do so in a way that made sense, helped the plot, and will lead to what I wanted at the end, so buckle up, and let's go for a ride!

“Sam, did you find what I asked for?”

“Well, hello, how are you doing? I’m fine, thanks for asking,” Sam’s witty reply came from the other side of the line.

“Cortland, come on, I have no time for your games, did you find me someone or not?”

Celaena typed on her laptop furiously while she listened to Sam on the cell, still trying to enter Dorian’s computer even if she knew all her attempts were futile.

“I did. I found a team. It’s all pretty secretive, I’m sending you a link, and you’ll just have to follow the instructions.”

“Thanks.”

Celaena hung up the phone and threw it onto the bed while she opened up her conversation with Sam on the computer’s screen. Right after returning from the masquerade with Dorian last weekend, she had tried to access his father’s computer to download the guest list, but to her surprise, she was out of the system.

She had gone into that computer so many times, that when she found herself out, she was confused at first. That confusion quickly turned into anger. Celaena attempted every trick she knew, and still, every time she tried to access the computer on the top floor, she was kicked out. It was as if someone was actively getting her out of it every single time. No matter how much Celaena knew about computers, she was no expert. She knew enough to get by, but there was nothing else she could do, and that infuriated her.

She hated to admit it, but she needed a real expert.

Not trusting Arobynn anymore after seeing him at the gala with whom she potentially thought could be her aunt, she was now on her own. She didn’t know any hackers in town that weren’t in some way tangled with Arobynn already, and that’s when she thought of asking Sam for help.

Adarlan Elite High was a big school, one full of rich people with lots of things to hide, lots of things to protect. She knew if Sam asked around, he’d be able to find someone. After all, Sam’s goal in the last two months had been getting to know everybody and making acquaintances. If he couldn’t be of help finding her a hacker, then what was the point of it all?

Finally opening up the link that Sam sent her, Celaena scratched her brow. The link seemed to download a ghost program onto her computer and then led her to a page with encrypted bank details. Sam had explained that the address of the place she had to go to wouldn’t be given to her until a deposit was made. Enough to cover a basic fee, and the rest of the payment would be done after the job was finished.

The prices were high, but Celaena couldn’t be worrying about money now, not if it meant she could get a real lead. For years, she had had the hunch that her aunt might have been involved with her parent’s accident somehow, but she had always tried to ignore those feelings, telling herself that Maeve had been the one to look after her every time her parents went over on business trips, the one to buy her presents for every birthday, and the one that had organized a beautiful ceremony after her parent’s death; one that she had only heard about from third parties and a lot of research.

She didn’t want to believe her own family would have betrayed her, but after looking into Dorian’s computer for weeks and weeks, she was almost certain his company had had nothing to do with the accident. And getting to know Dorian Jr. now, she had to admit he wasn’t half as bad as she had expected. 

Celaena got up from the bed and headed to her dresser after making the transfer. She pulled out her leather jacket, changed her shoes to her laced-up boots, and grabbed the bike’s helmet from the top of the night table.

It was time to go for a ride and find herself some hackers. 

Celaena rode the elevator to the basement and jumped on her bike, setting up the coordinates that were sent to her by transferring the link straight into her GPS system. The location seemed to be close to the docks, and not being overly surprised by it, she rode out. She left the crowded part of the city behind in no time, turning towards the cliffs on the outskirts. She was almost to the docks when the GPS made a beeping noise, and the coordinates changed all of a sudden, telling her to do a U-turn.

“Sweet trick,” she chuckled to herself.

She turned around at the end of the road, and followed back on her tracks, returning the way she came. Once she was almost into the city limits, she got this weird feeling in the back of her neck. Looking through the rearview mirror, she got a glimpse of a bike behind her, but when she looked back, it was gone. She drove fast for another five minutes, following the directions until she was about five blocks from her destination. She slowed down, and as soon she was two blocks away, the location changed again. She looked over her shoulder and got a glimpse of a shadow behind her.

It wasn’t too dark yet, the sun only just reaching the horizon, but the tall buildings on that side of the town made the roads dark enough for her to struggle to figure out if there was someone behind her, or if she was being overly paranoid.

The location changed place three more times before she finally got to the end of a quiet road, and the GPS signaled for her to go down an extremely narrow alley in between two buildings. She parked up on the street, jumped down, and put her helmet away in the compartment under the seat. Looking behind her once more, the road was deserted.

Maybe she was indeed paranoid, or maybe the hackers had someone trailing her to make sure she wasn’t being followed by anybody else. Every single hacker she knew was over-suspicious and certainly odd. 

Celaena walked all the way to the end of the alley, and a message arrived on her phone, indicating to knock three times on the metal door with a triangle drawn on it. There were three doors at the end, all the same except for the faint triangle scraped into the metal of the middle one. It was rough, and it could have been mistaken for senseless scrapings if she hadn’t been looking for the triangular shape. 

She knocked three times and waited.

The door creaked open an inch, and a pair of black eyes looked at her from the dim interior.

“Who’s this?”

“Deposit 45986, my reference is Fireheart,” Celaena replied, stating the number of her deposit and the name she chose to use as code. 

“Coded word?” The voice coming from inside was definitely female and sounded fairly young.

“Dolphin,” she replied, repeating the word that was texted to her only a few seconds ago.

“Come in.”

The door opened another few inches, and Celaena walked in, the door slamming shut behind her. It took a few moments for her eyes to adjust to the dim interior, and when they did, she found herself in a long and narrow corridor, the woman already walking away in front of her. Adjusting her leather jacket, Celaena followed.

They looked to be almost the same height, and the lady was wearing all black clothes, barely visible in the darkness. They reached an elevator at the end of the hall, and the doors opened automatically to show a small round lift with mirrors all around.

As they stepped in, Celaena got a better look at her escort and was surprised to find she only looked a few years older than herself. Her hair was as dark as her eyes, and it was long and straight, getting almost to her waist. She smelled faintly of tobacco, and her face was set on a hard unmovable expression. She almost looked bored.

A sepulchral silence surrounded them as they went down, and down, and down. It took longer than expected till the doors finally opened up again to reveal a small room, illuminated by a single yellow-ish light. There was another girl there, sitting at a small desk with a computer, and Celaena had to look back and forth to make sure she wasn’t imagining things. The girl at the desk looked exactly the same as the one by her side, the only difference being that her hair was light-blond instead of midnight black.

“This is how things work around here,” the blond said, pointing to a little scanner on the table. “We trade in secrets. Before you can step into the den, you need to scan your fingerprint here.” She pointed at the small scanner, a humorless smile on her lips. “We will share all our secrets with you, in exchange for all of yours.”

Celaena doubted for a minute, her fingers tapping the side of her thigh furiously as she thought about what to do. She needed to find out what was going on with her aunt, and maybe these girls checking up on her would be an effective test to see how good they were at their job. There was no registry of Aelin after she was about 8 years old, and all her records as Celaena were fake and not linked to her digits whatsoever. She was a ghost, a dead girl, there was nothing for her to fear. 

She convinced herself that it was alright, that she could do this, and taking one step forward, she pressed her finger against the scanner.

A red light blinked under her finger, and then the blond indicated for her to do the index from her other hand too. The red light blinked again, and then Celaena looked into the blond girl’s eyes, her irises moving back and forth as she read information from the screen in front of her, her fingers flying over the keyboard at a speed Celaena had never seen before.

“Well, well,” the blond said after the longest minute in Celaena’s life. “Welcome to our den, Aelin Ashryver Galathynius,” she said, standing up and opening the metal door behind her.

Celaena’s shock from hearing someone other than Sam use her real name for so long was almost overrun by the sight of the room in front of her. She took a step in, following the blond, with the twin right behind her heels.

The room was huge, with high ceilings full of hanging light bulbs in all sizes and shapes. The walls had led lights on every side, making the room bright but pleasant to the eyes at the same time. Right in the middle, three huge desks were forming a triangle, one of the edges pointing to the door, so the desk on the back was mostly covered from sight from where Celaena was standing. The two desks she could see had the biggest screens Celaena had ever seen, and they were covered in all kinds of machines with lights blinking all over the place. 

Against the wall on the right, there were several pinball machines, and to the left, there was a set of couches with three flat-screen TVs attached to the wall, and massive shelves full of movies and books to each side of them. 

As Celaena took in the place with her jaw hanging a little open, a third figure stood up from the desk on the back, and the twins standing to each side of her smiled wickedly, nodding as a way of greeting.

“Sisters,” the new girl said, stepping from behind the desk and walking around until she was right in front of Celaena. “I see you’ve brought our newest client.” 

Blinking again and feeling dumbfounded, Celaena extended a hand toward her. She had been mistaken to think the girls were twins; even if the one standing now in front of her had golden eyes instead of black, and her hair was of the most radiant silver, there was no doubt to her that these girls were triplets. They looked like printed copies in different colors.

“I’m Manon,” the silver-haired one said, taking the hand Celaena was offering. “My sister here is Asterin,” she pointed to the blond girl, “and this is Sorrel,” she added as she pointed to the dark-haired one. “And we welcome you to the Blackbeak den,” she gestured theatrically to the room and then headed towards the couches, the other two girls following behind her.

Feeling a little out of place, Celaena grabbed a seat.

“What can we do for you, Aelin?”

She swallowed hard, her neck feeling clammy with sweat, her heartbeat going wild inside her chest. Hearing her name again after so long, was a strange feeling. She tried to picture Sam by the coast, telling her she could be whoever she wanted to be, telling her she was indeed all three. Celaena, Aelin, and Fireheart. She looked at each of the triplets, holding their gaze, reading their eyes. They all seemed composed, wickedly serious, but trustworthy, even if Celaena wasn’t one to trust anybody. But maybe… Maybe Aelin could trust. No one had known who she was before, and if these girls had found out in a matter of minutes, then she had to believe they could help her with her parents’ case. And if that trust was broken, well… Then Fireheart could always take matters into her own hands: literally.

She took one last deep breath, cracked her knuckles, and then proceeded to explain what she needed.

“Should be easy enough,” Asterin said after she had finished talking.

“We don’t jump to conclusions, Asterin,” Manon corrected. “When do you need this information?”

“As soon as possible. Once you have the list, and if I find what I’m looking for in it, I’d like to do a full investigation on the person we find.”

“Good. Let us work, we’ll contact you as soon as we have anything,” Sorrel explained.

“No questions asked,” Asterin added as if finishing her sister’s sentence. “That’s our policy.”

“Your secret is safe with us,” Mannon filled in, a stoic look on her face, “as long as you don’t cross us. A single word about who we are, and we’ll know. One word out of your mouth about this place, and your life will be turned upside down, your every secret spilled like blood draining from a freshly open wound. Understood?”

Standing up and squaring her shoulders, Celeana nodded. “I understand. I don’t go around spilling secrets, only blood,” she winked at the silver-haired girl, who snarled back at her.

“Let’s hope neither is spilled in here,” Asterin added, a sweet smile on her lips that made her look somehow lethal.

By the time Celaena jumped back into her bike, her heart was still racing. Having someone know about her identity was not on her plans, and she hoped it better be worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo! What did you think?? I'm loving all the comments this story is getting, and I would love love loveee to know what you thought about this new chapter! I'd stopped writing for a bit, and getting back into this story has been everything in the last few days! So I hope I managed to convey everything I wanted into this chapter <3  
> Much love! and have a fantastic week! :D


	26. It doesn't change a thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Substance use is shown in this chapter. I tried to keep it pretty low-key and not super obvious, but it's there.

Time was going by too quickly, and Sam felt torn in between worlds. Attempting to help Aelin, and doing jobs during the night for Arobynn was exhausting, but dealing with the ball committee had been on a whole other level.

“Sam, please pass me those scissors there.”

“Briar, hurry up, we need all those cut up by yesterday!”

“Imogen? Where’s Imogen? Has anybody seen Imogen? Agh, come on everybody, we have eight hours until people start arriving, and we’re not nearly there!”

“Lys,” Sam approached her cautiously, his palms raised and a gentle smile on his face. 

“What now? What’s wrong?” Lysandra kept walking around, making sure everybody was working, and Sam followed her, his feet moving fast to keep the pace.

“Lys, slow down.”

She kept walking, grabbed a bunch of balloons, and tied them up together as she headed towards the stage where she secured them to one side.

“Lys, stop, and look at me.” She finally turned around, her eyes frantically rushing across his face as if looking for the motive of the interruption. “What’s wrong?”

“What do you mean, what’s wrong? There’s a lot to do, and we’re running behind, and Imogen just disappeared, and-”

“Hey, hey, slow down, take a deep breath.” He reached over and grabbed her hands in his, locking eyes with her. “Breathe with me, in through the nose.” He inhaled deeply, and Lysandra copied him. “And blow it out,” he exhaled as he spoke, blowing the rest of the air loudly and watching Lys do the same. “That’s better, now tell me, what’s wrong.”

“Nothing, I’m just stressed about the ball.”

Sam lifted a brow and pushed his lips to one side. “It’s just a Halloween party, it’s not even a formal ball, and we have plenty of time to get ready. So... I know something else is wrong. If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine, but know that I’m here if you need me, okay?”

Lysandra’s shoulders relaxed a bit as he spoke, and he knew she was about to tell him everything before she even started.

“You’re right. I’m sorry, I’m being a pain in everybody’s backside, I’m being so silly. I fought with Aedion earlier on, and I shouldn’t be taking it out on all of you.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Actually, I think I do... I have an idea,” she turned around to address the crowd that was inflating balloons, painting props, and hanging fake spider webs from the walls. “Everybody, head out to grab some fresh air and something to eat, we meet back here in twenty minutes!”

They all chanted happily and thanked Lysandra as they headed out of the school’s gym, leaving them alone in the big room. Lys sat on the edge of the stage, and Sam jumped up to sit next to her.

“Are you okay?” He asked as he reached over and laid a hand on her knee.

“I am,” Lys put her hand over Sam’s, and squeezed it gently. “It was so stupid, I don’t know why I’m worrying you with all my drama.”

“If it matters to you, then it’s not stupid.”

Lysandra took a deep breath and sighed loudly. “It’s all my fault anyway. I know I seem collected most of the time, it’s like everybody thinks I’m this perfect girl with no flaws, like everything comes easily to me. But sometimes, I act like a crazy jealous girlfriend. It’s like Aedion is the only one I can lash at, because he knows me best, and he accepts me knowing my flaws. I think I got on his nerves this time, and he ended up snapping after I confronted him with a jealousy-mayhem.”

“Hm, okay, what was the trigger? What do you think makes you jealous?”

“Have you seen him?” Lys laughed, and Sam laughed with her. He had, and he could imagine where the jealousy was coming from, but it was important for Lysandra to address it and talk about it. “I mean, probably a third of the school is interested in him. And he could have anybody he wanted… So I guess sometimes I feel a little insecure. You know, I’m not like the rest of them, I wasn’t born rich, my family is one of those they call ‘new rich’, which is one of the reasons why I need to seem perfect. Otherwise, I’d fall down to the bottom of the social ladder.” Lysandra was looking down while playing with a loose strand of her skirt.

“Lys, look at me.” She did, and Sam smiled. He was finding it hard to believe he had found such an amazing friend when he wasn’t even looking for one. “You are a caring soul, you care about everybody around you, and most of all, you care about Aedion. You’re always looking out for him, making sure you are the best version of yourself for him, but don’t forget to be the best for yourself too. I’m sure people don’t care about where you come from, they care about you for who you are. And that insecurity you feel, you need to talk to Aedion about it, because that’s the only way you will be able to work on it, which means working on yourself. I get the feeling that he’s not the greatest at talking, but I’m sure he will love to listen to what you have to say. He’ll understand.”

Lysandra wrapped her arms around Sam’s shoulders and squeezed him so tight he almost ran out of air. “Thank you,” she whispered in his ear. “He is not the best at talking, you are right, but he always listens to me patiently. I was silly to be jealous of Ress anyway.” 

She let go of Sam and jumped off the stage, offering Sam a hand to jump down too.

“Why were you jealous of Ress?” He asked, unable to shut down his curiosity.

“Oh, they went out to play videogames, and I know it’s silly, I know Aedion doesn’t feel anything for him anymore, but sometimes I struggle to let go of the past, you know? It’s easy for me to joke about him being with other people, but I don’t know why his past is different.”

Sam was staring at her, trying to make sense of what he was hearing. “You kind of just lost me there...”

“What? Oh, you didn’t know?” Lys slapped her forehead and huffed laughingly. “Right, sorry, I sometimes forget you haven’t been around here for long. You might not know all of Adarlan Elite’s stories as we do. Aedion and Ress dated for a while when we were sophomores; it didn’t last long and they broke up like nine months before we started dating. But still, sometimes I feel like Ress is a way better fit for him, I mean, his family is one of the most important ones in all of Adarlan. They’d be such a power couple.”

“Oh, wow, okay.” Sam was lost for words, his mind reeling. He told himself it didn’t matter, he was still in the same place he’d been a few minutes ago.

_ It doesn’t change a thing.  _

“Thank you again for listening, Sam Cortland,” she said his name almost mockingly, like a private joke between them. “I know we haven’t known each other for long, but you are the best friend I could have ever wished for, and I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“I am thankful for you too, Lys.”

Lysandra grabbed his hand and guided him towards the doors. “Let’s go grab a quick bite before everybody returns.”

***

As Sam walked into the gym later that afternoon, he was amazed by the change the lighting could do. The room looked spooky in such a cool way, and the atmosphere was buzzing with so many people already on the dance floor and the music blasting out loud.

He spotted Lysandra in the middle of the room almost immediately. She had a beautiful and intricate flower crown, with her hair pinned up and cascading to one side. Her skull-like makeup was spot on and finished with bright gemstones. She was wearing a long floral emerald dress that matched her eyes. It hugged her body nicely, and then fanned out in a big puffy skirt. Adion’s hands were wrapped around her waist as they danced, his big black hat casting a shadow over both of them. He leaned in to say something to Lysandra, and she laughed brightly in response. As they twirled around, Sam got a good view of Aedion’s matching makeup, the black around his eyes making his turquoise irises pop like gems in the bottom of the ocean. 

It was good to see they had fixed their differences, even if a pang of jealousy was squeezing his chest.

Sam walked towards the drink station and filled up a glass of punch. He drank it slowly as he looked across the room, waving at a few people and having quick chats with others that walked past or went over to grab a drink too. He knew almost everybody in the room, but at the same time, he felt oddly like an outsider. None of the people there really knew who he was, how poor his family had been. What would they think of him if they knew all his money came from stealing from people like them?

After a few minutes standing on his own, Ress, Ren, and Nox showed up by his side, chatting loudly over the music. Sam had never thanked any of them for helping him the day he had been involved in that fight with Rourke, but he often still found himself thinking about it. Because despite all his lies, these people seemed to care about him, and that only made him feel even more guilty.

“How are you doing, Sam?” Ren asked as he bumped a fist against his chest. He was dressed up as a football player, not much imagination going into his costume.

“Not bad, what about yourself?”

“Thinking about going for a dance! You keen?”

“Nah, I’m good, maybe later,” he waved a hand in front of his face to make sure he could understand him over the music.

“Boring! Hey, Nox! Let’s hit the dance floor!”

Ren hooked an arm around Nox’s shoulders and pushed him towards the crowd as they both swayed their hips and disappeared among the throng of people. He wasn’t sure what Nox’s dress-up was meant to be, he was just wearing all plain black clothes.

“Hey, cowboy,” Ress greeted him with a smirk. “Those two love to dance,” he added as he stood by his side, looking at the crowd dancing in front of them. Ress was wearing wide green pants and a colorful striped shirt with big lapels, and half the buttons were undone, the ripped muscles in his chest popping up in the danceroom’s lighting.

“And you don’t?” Sam had to lean closer as the music changed into an upbeat tone, and his voice was almost lost in the noise.

“Not really, all this loud music is not really my vibe,” Ress was talking into his ear, and he looked down as he finished. Sam followed his gaze and saw his hand fishing something out of his pocket, and then hiding it again. “There are other ways I rather have fun… Keen on a smoke, Cortland?” He wiggled his brows, and Sam had to stifle a laugh.

He looked back to the dancing crowd, thinking about how tired he was and how long his day had been, how out of place he felt, all his lies piling up on each other and making him gasp for air. And then he looked to the side, and smiled at Ress. “I could use some fresh air.”

He hadn’t seen Celaena yet, and even if he was a bit surprised by her absence, he knew she’d probably make a really dramatic and late entrance. They were up to date after sharing the afternoon at the fights the night before, so he assumed it’d be okay for him to take some time for himself.

Ress smirked and pointed towards the stage. “Follow me, I know quite the place, I think you’ll like it.”

They headed over to the side of the stage, and Ress pushed a small door open, which led underneath it. They sneaked in, and Ress got his phone out and turned on the flashlight, leading them around dark halls that twisted and turned until they got to some stairs and started climbing up.

“How do you know your way around here?”

“I know every corner of this school, I used to… sneak around a lot during my early years.”

They climbed all the way up, reaching some kind of attic on top of the gym. The room was dim, but then Ress pushed some dark sheets to the side and revealed a big window overlooking the school grounds. The moonlight filtered through the glass, showing a small room with wooden floors and wooden walls. The roof was low and gabled, so both of them had to crouch if they weren’t right in the middle where the window was.

“Cool, huh?” Ress was smirking, clearly proud to be showing off the spot.

“Not bad.”

Sam looked out of the window and admired the sight as Ress fumbled around the room, getting rid of a few more sheets covering random items, grabbing a couple of bean bags from a corner for them to sit on, and setting a small crate as a table by the side. Once he seemed happy with the display, he opened up the window and pulled a lighter out of his pocket.

“I can’t believe this place even exists,” Sam muttered. 

They could barely hear the music in the distance, but the whole place was vibrating due to it.

“There’s a lot of secrets in Adarlan Elite,” Ress exhaled out of the window and offered Sam the smoke. 

He knew he shouldn’t accept it, but just for once, he wanted to break the rules, not to care. And what better place for that than hiding in an attic? It was almost as if he could ignore everything that was going on, take a pause from life and just let himself be in that little and secret room. Maybe he cbe just that, himself. Perhaps the attic could be a small safe bubble where his defenses could go down for a minute, where he could let some of the real Sam out. 

He accepted the offering, took a quick drag, and coughed as he exhaled, his throat burning as he did. Ress patted him in the back as Sam wiped tears off his eyes. 

“You’ll get used to it,” he said as he took a big drag, smoke curling around him as he exhaled, making him look almost expectral. “Wanna try again?” Ress dropped onto one of the bean bags on the floor, a huge grin on his face, and Sam sat next to him.

He shook his head, doubting his resolution as his body started to relax a little already; but found himself extending his hand forward regardless. 

“Is that a yes, or a no?” Ress asked jokingly as he leaned back and out of Sam’s reach.

“I think it’s a ‘my mind is saying no, but my body says yes’,” he was so conflicted between his wants and needs. His head was already feeling a little light, and he could feel laughter wanting to burst out of his chest.

He should be heading back downstairs to look after Celaena, and he shouldn’t be under the influence of any kind of substance while he was supposed to be working, but at the same time… He preached so much to Lysandra about taking care of herself, but he never took care of himself. He was chewing at his lip furiously, and Ress smirked.

“You’re pretty adorable when you think, Cortland,” he said. “You know, it’s okay to say no.”

Sam shook his head, and let a smile spread on his lips. “It’s a yes,” he said as he leaned over and tried to pry the joint out of Ress’ hand, one hand resting on the floor as he propped himself up and over the guy’s body to reach over. “Definitely a yes,” he breathed out, his body gravitating over Ress as his hand finally found what he was looking for.

Ress smiled mischievously, wrapping his hand around Sam’s instead of letting go. He helped guide the smoke to his lips, his fingers almost brushing Sam’s skin. “Just take it slow, Sam… Let the smoke cool inside your mouth for a second before you breathe it in.” Sam sucked lightly, the smoke twirling in his mouth. “And know that-” Ress’ dark eyes seemed almost black as his pupils dilated, and Sam let the smoke into his lungs. Ress’ smile softened into a cute little thing. “Whatever happens in this attic-” Ress let his hand linger in Sam’s as he guided it to the side, dropping the blunt on the little crate he had set up as a table, “doesn’t need to leave this attic.” 

Sam exhaled slowly, his chest caving in, the muscles on the arm that was keeping him up softening its hold, and his head feeling light as a feather as he let himself sink into the moment.

He was Sam Cortland, and he wouldn’t be afraid of who he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!! I would looove to hear your thoughts, I actually loved writing this chapter so much, and I got so excited with the ending I even wrote a little one-shot kind of chapter of what happens afterward.  
> I'm thinking about posting it elsewhere? I'm not sure it should be part of this story but would really love to share it with the world because it ended up being something quite precious to me <3  
> Let me know what you think!  
> Okay, finally got around to uploading the one-shot, so I thought I'd drop the link here for any new readers <3  
> [RESS AND SAM ONE SHOT](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29043564/chapters/71286399)
> 
> Enjoy!!! :D


	27. Bewildering Halloween

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there! I thought it was about time I updated the chapter for this week, because... There's no better way to start Monday! Right?
> 
> You may or may have not noticed the change of username here! Just wanted to explain that I did a bit of re-branding this week, and I changed all my users from Nayla (my pen name) to Brina (short for Sabrina, my actual name lol). This is due to the fact that I'm trying to make my writing a little bit more serious, and actually make a career out of it. 
> 
> Anyways, you can find me under the same user in Wattpad or Inkitt for original stories, on Instagram for a bit of bookstagram action as well as updates on my own writing, and sometimes random things about my life, or find me on Tumblr as @knittingdreams
> 
> Okay, enough chatter, let's get into the chapter!!

Rifthold’s streets were all decorated according to the season, and it made the place look spookier than it normally did during the night. Riding over to the school while being fashionably late, Celaena sighed loudly.

“Are you okay?” Dorian asked from the driver’s seat. “You seem a bit… Moody tonight. I’d thought you’d be more excited about this party.”

“Oh, you know I love a good party, it’s just… It’s nothing, really.”

Dorian arched a brow but didn’t push her. It wasn’t like they were a real couple, and talking about their personal lives was out of the question. They were together as a mere arrangement that benefited both of them, even if Celaena wasn’t sure about what was in it for Dorian. For her, he was the perfect excuse for her late-night benders, disappearing all the time, and weird bruises showing up here or there that she hoped people interpreted as love-bite marks. As embarrassing as that could be, it was better than people finding out the truth.

There were only a couple of weeks left on the tournament, and Celaena hoped that after it was over, she’d be able to get out of her fake-dating deal with Dorian. She had been to the fights the night before, and after having the Blackbeak triplets confirm her suspicions that Maeve had indeed been at the masquerade, she had hoped to run into her there; but she hadn’t been that lucky.

Celaena had worked with the triplets every day since Wednesday, asking for more information every time they delivered news for her. They were working on finding out who Maeve’s escort to the party had been, hoping that way she’d have someone to get information from. Escorts were not required to sign in as guests, so the triplets had been looking at security footage instead, trying to find an identifiable face they could run through their systems. So far, it had proved harder than expected, as the building didn't have many cameras, and it looked like the security guard always had his back to them.

“Okay, we’re here,” Dorian jumped out of the car, and as usual, walked around to open up her door and help her out. It was an odd detail, but Celaena had grown accustomed to it, and she didn’t mind it as much, especially when she was wearing heels as high as the ones she had at the moment. 

She was wearing a golden dress, the bodice tightly fitting, decorated with thousands of equally golden beads. It had a low neckline, and a closed up-rear; even if she had dared wear spaghetti straps, there was no way she was exposing her back. She had a matching shawl over her shoulders, and her hair was pinned up, crowned with a spikey tiara that resembled the rays of the sun. Her heels were gold stilettos, followed by bare long legs as her skirt barely reached her knees.

Holding Dorian’s hand to jump out, he looked at her up and down once more, the same way he had done at the lobby of the hotel.

“I know I’m being repetitive, but you look absolutely stunning tonight, Celaena,” he said politely.

Dorian offered her his arm once she was out, and Celaena rested her hand on the inside of his elbow, letting Dorian lead her into the school. 

As they walked in, heads turned their way. She knew her golden attire was drawing attention, but to be fair, Dorian by her side was a sight of his own. He had a midnight blue suit on top of a black shirt, and every inch of the suit was decorated with tiny specks of silver dust. If Celaena was the sun, Dorian by her side was the perfect incarnation of a starry night.

“Should I get you a drink?”

“Sparkling water in a flute,” she replied, her smirk making Dorian chuckle.

There was no fight that night, but Celaena had no intention of getting intoxicated in the foreseeable future, there was too much at stake, and she was too close to finding real evidence to get distracted.

She looked around the dancefloor, hoping to spot Sam, but he was nowhere to be seen. She spotted a lot of familiar faces though, a few of the guys from the football team dancing together, a group of bees and their respective dates chattering in a corner, Thea and Kaya dancing in the middle of the dance floor, their bodies swinging from one side to the other. The most surprising sight was watching Lorcan, costume-less, his hands hiding in his pants pockets as he leaned down to say something to Elide. The petite girl was wearing plastic pointy ears and had her hair braided to one side, little flowers scattered through it. She was wearing a simple but gorgeous green gown, making up a very decent woodland fae. Celaena told herself she’d keep an eye on them, just in case. She didn’t trust Lorcan being around sweet and innocent Elide.

Looking to the side, she found Lysandra and Aedion dancing, and a flicker of doubt settled into her chest. She still had no idea if she could trust her cousin, or if he was somehow involved, but getting to know him again in the past months had brought up so many memories, and she couldn’t help but think she wished she could get closer to him. Find out if he was still the caring family he had been, if there was a way she could get him back. She shook her head, trying to get rid of those thoughts. It seemed like having the triplets discover her identity had struck her harder than she’d thought, and she had no time for that.

Before she could look away, the couple twirled, and Aedion’s eyes found Aelin’s for a second, making her feel vulnerable and exposed. She looked away, turning her eyes to the stage where a live band was setting up some instruments. Before her eyes could focus on them, Dorian arrived back at her side.

“Sparkling water for a sparkling ray of sunshine,” he joked as he passed her the glass.

Celaena snickered and took a sip to cover her smile. Dorian was a dork, but she had to admit, she had fun every time they were pushed to spending time together.

“Dance with me?” Dorian offered her an arm, and Celaena took it. 

He led her to the middle of the dance floor and they twirled around to a soft but infectious tune, Dorian’s arms gingerly holding her waist as if scared he might be pushing the boundaries of their agreement too far, which felt stupid to Celaena considering how he had kissed her in the middle of the cafeteria a few weeks back.

“Are you ever going to tell me what you’re getting out of this arrangement?” She asked, leaning into his ear. 

“I told you, my father doesn’t approve of school girls as girlfriends,” he said too quickly.

“Why me?” She pushed.

“I saw the look on his face the day you rode in on your motorbike,” Dorian admitted with a smirk. “Not… feminine enough for my father’s taste. A girl that can think for herself, be independent, walk around with her chin up, owning herself… That’s not the girl he wants by my side. He wants a doll, a facade.”

Celaena turned his words in her mind, trying to hide the smirk tugging at her cheeks in an almost painful way. If his father only knew who she really was, what she got up to every time she left the hotel late at night. 

They twirled again, and Celaena thought she saw a mass of black dreadlocks in the corner of her eye, but as she finished spinning and looked to where the girl had been, she was gone.

“Let’s go get some air,” she offered, dropping her hands down from Dorian’s shoulders and turning around, knowing he’d follow.

They were almost to the door when a familiar face stopped them.

“Hey, Dorian, how’s it going?” Chaol asked, an almost silly smile plastered on his face. “Celaena,” he added, nodding her way.

“Chaol!” Dorian clasped his friend in a brotherly hug, patting his back before stepping back. “So… Is this the reason you’ve ditched me last weekend?” He added, pointing with his head to the girl shyly standing by Chaol’s side.

“Uhm, yeah, sorry bro,” Chaol said nervously. “Dorian, Celaena, this is Yrene. Yrene, this is my best friend I’ve talked to you about, Dorian, and his date, Celaenea.”

The chosen word to address her wasn’t lost to Celaena, but being polite with the new girl, she smiled broadly. Yrene’s smile was small and sweet, and she nodded in greeting as she took in the sight of Celaena, looking at her with wide eyes. 

“It’s a pleasure,” Dorian replied.

“Are you guys heading out? The best bit is about to start, the band will be playing in a few minutes,” Chaol noted.

“We were just heading out for a minute to grab some air, we’ve danced a lot,” Celaena explained, wiping invisible sweat out of her forehead.

“Which band’s playing tonight?” Dorian asked.

Chaol looked at Dorian in a weird knowing way, and Celaena looked back and forth between the boys, wondering what was the silent conversation going on between them.

“I thought you knew,” Chaol finally said. “It’s The Coven, the committee worked really hard to get them on board.”

Celaena noticed Dorian tensing by her side, but he relaxed again, making a quick shrugging motion before stepping towards the door. “I didn’t know,” he said. “Catch you later, Chaol.”

With that, Dorian walked out into the yard, and Celaena followed him, wondering what that had all been about.

As they stepped out, she wrapped her shawl around her shoulders tighter, not wanting the wind to blow it away. 

“Dorian, are you okay?”

The music was still blasting inside, and even if there were a few kids scattered outside smoking, the night felt quiet and almost silent around them in comparison to the loud gym.

“Yeah, absolutely,” he said, not sounding convinced.

“Dorian,” she tried again, not sure why she was pushing it. “I know you and I are not... a real thing, but you know you can talk to me, I’m not as heartless as I seem.”

Dorian looked up as if he was looking at her for the first time, his brows a little furrowed, his lips turned to one side, but his blue eyes still lost in thought. 

“You know, my whole life, Chaol’s been the only person I ever trusted to be myself with,” he blurted. “We grew up together, he’s almost like my sibling.”

“I didn’t know that,” she replied, not sure what else to say. 

“Yeah, our parents have worked together since I have memory, Chaol’s dad is my father’s secretary, and they’ve always worked closely, so we’ve been together since kindy. And it’s the first time I see Chaol looking happy, like himself, with a girl. I guess it tugged at something inside of me. Chaol’s free to pick whoever he wants to be by his side.”

“So are you,” Celaena said, the words slipping out of her lips before she could think about them.

Dorian snickered, and then looked away.

“You’re too naive,” he said almost under his breath. “I wish it was that simple, but when you come from a family like mine, things are never simple.”

He was shaking his head, and Celaena didn’t know what she was meant to do when someone opened up their heart.

“Why don’t we head back inside?” She offered casually. “Check out the band, maybe?”

Dorian tsked, looking at her with a conflicting expression.

“The Coven,” he said as if it was a curse. “Do you know them?”

“Can’t say I’ve heard of them.”

“It’s an all-girl band. They used to come here, to Adarlan Elite High, I mean. They graduated a couple of years ago… When I was a freshman, I had a massive crush on one of them. I thought I was too good back then, thought my name could get me anything I wanted…”

“And she rejected you?” Celaena almost laughed as she guessed the outcome of the story, but Dorian seemed so serious that she tried to keep it together.

“Publicly,” he whispered.

“That bad?” Celaena had to bite her bottom lip not to laugh.

Dorian caught her expression and scolded her with a simple look. 

“Not funny! It was terrible!” He blurted, but Celaena could tell he was laughing too.

“Come on, let’s show her what she’s missing out on, I’m sure she’ll regret not saying yes when she sees you slaying the dancefloor with the most gorgeous girl in school.”

Celaena whipped her hair back dramatically, and Dorian laughed, his frown finally softening as he followed her inside.

“Okay, let’s do this.”

When they walked back in through the door, Dorian and Celaena were engulfed by the loud music. The band was already on the stage, a catchy tune filling up the air, people’s arms lifted high up as throngs of students jumped, twirled, and swung. Through it all, Celaena’s eyes were fixed on the stage. 

The band consisted of three girls, all of them dressed up in black layered skirts and mesh tops. They were wearing burgundy tunics and big necklaces with pentagrams, and as the smoke swirled under their feet, they looked like a real witch's coven, like something out of a movie.

“They’re just costumes,” Dorian said in her ear as she kept staring, “they’re pretty normal underneath all of that. They’ve always looked kind of gothic though. I always thought it was a way to draw people away, they kept to themselves quite a bit.”

Celaena glanced at Dorian, and then looked back up to the stage, bewildered by the way the blond witch’s fingers were flying over an electronic keyboard. 

“Creepy, right?” Dorian commented. “They’re triplets.”

Celaena nodded and shook her head, trying to get her thoughts to settle. Of course, she knew they were triplets. On the stage, Asterin Blackbeak was smashing up a tune on the keyboard while Sorrel was playing the drums in the back, her eyeliner and black eyeshadow so thick that Celaena could see it from the other end of the room. And right there, in the middle of the stage, was Manon, leading the band. She was playing the guitar as she sang along to an original song, something about midnight, the witching hour, and blood. 

Even if the lyrics were dark, the tune was contagious, and if it wasn’t because she was staring at the hackers that were meant to be looking into what mattered the most in her life, she’d have been dancing like the rest of the crowd. 


	28. Ditching Halloween

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like it's been way too long since I updated! (I know, it's barely been a week, because, you know, I keep my promises haha)  
> Oh well, I hope you really enjoy this new chapter! :D

Almost as if floating in a cloud, Celaena let herself be guided back to the dance floor. Her mind was reeling about all these coincidences because, in all honesty, she didn’t believe in coincidence. She knew she should approach Manon, so while dancing mindlessly, she made sure to get closer and closer to the front, waiting for the second the band would get off stage so she’d be able to coax the triplets for more information. 

Her plan failed when out of the corner of her eye, she spotted the black dreads again, a glint of gold catching her eye. Celaena turned to the side and found Nehemia dancing close by, her arms resting on Nox’s shoulders. Drawing her hands back and sliding them through Nox’s arms, Nehemia held his hands as she swayed, and then Nox made her twirl under his arm. Their eyes locked for a second as she spun, and Celeana knew she had her attention.

Excusing herself, Nehemia rushed out of the dancefloor, not before looking back at her, as if wanting her to follow. Confused, but curious, Celaena told Dorian she needed to head to the toilet for a moment. She chased after Nehemia, who, coincidentally, ended up heading to the bathroom. 

“Hey,” she said as she walked in, not sure how to approach the matter.

It had been over two weeks since they'd last spoken, and even if she had been busy, Celaena missed Nehemia. Having her there during lunch, fighting over slices of pizza, and walking together through the hallways, just being themselves. But hadn’t that been the problem? Celaena couldn’t be herself.

“Hey,” Nehemia stopped touching up her make-up in the mirror and turned around to fully face her. “It’s been a while,” her tone was almost casual, and Celaena dared wonder if it was the day she’d be forgiven.

“It’s been too long,” Celaena admitted.

The world seemed to slow down around them as they stared at each other, not even blinking. There were so many things to be said between them, but Celaena wasn’t sure she could say any of them. Maybe… Maybe just one thing.

“I...” She bit her lip, all her secrets weighing on her shoulders. “You were right, I’ve been lying to you,” she admitted.

“And you’re ready to be truthful?” Nehemia asked, her arms crossed over her chest now.

“I’m ready to admit that there’s a lot of things I can not tell you,” she let the truth out, and it felt good. “I wish I could, but I simply can’t.”

Nehemia seemed to ponder her words, to taste them, turn them around in her mouth as she savored them, her lips turning one way and then the other while her fingers drummed over the sink in front of her.

Finally, her lips parted.

“And why would that be? What would happen if you told me the truth?”

Celeana inhaled deeply, the scent of jasmine and lemon fresh in the air, mixing up with the smell of toilet cleaner.

“In the best of cases, you’d hate me for lying. In the worst, you’d end up hurt. Knowing me, the real me, is dangerous.”

“Because you’re involved in a dangerous business.” 

It wasn’t a question, but a statement, and Celaena wondered once more how much she could say, how much she should say. Getting to know Nehemia, learning how to be around a girl her own age, almost getting to call someone a friend, it had been too good to be true. Maybe she didn’t deserve that, maybe she wasn’t meant to have pretty things, good things. But she wanted to, she wished she could.

“Because I’m involved with dangerous people,” she finally admitted. “And I don’t want you anywhere near them.” Fixing the shawl over her shoulders, Celaena lifted her chin. 

Silence stretched, and she was ready to turn around and walk away when Nehemia took a step towards her.

“Is it that hard?” she asked. “To trust? To trust  _ me _ ?” Nehemia seemed pained, but there was also a trace of hope in her voice. “I thought we were friends, I thought I could trust you, and you could trust me, but the reality is, that I’ve also been lying to you all along. I’m not here for the reasons I told you. I’m not in Adarlan because I care about my education. And I don’t think you are either. If you’re ever ready to open up, I’ll do the same for you.”

Nehemia grabbed her purse off the counter, and hanging it over her shoulder, she walked right past Celaena.

“We could have been great friends,” she whispered as she walked past her. “But we both bear huge secrets.”

By the time Celaena was out of her stupor and turned around to follow her into the main room, Nehemia had disappeared in the throng of people. What kind of secrets could she be hiding?

When Celaena returned to the dance floor, the music had changed to a more mellow tune, and the band was packing up their instruments on the stage. She made her way over to the side where the instruments were being piled up and, eying the back door that led outside, she squeezed out. She found a van with the doors opened, a few instruments already loaded into it, and waited for the sisters to come out.

“Funny to see you here,” she said as a way of greeting when Manon emerged through the door, a guitar case on one hand, and an amplifier on the other.

“I could say the same thing,” Manon replied almost nonchalantly. “But I can’t, because I know all your secrets, hence, I knew you’d be here.”

Celaena stepped into Manon’s personal bubble, her face inches away from her while Fireheart came out to the surface. “Are you fucking with me?” She asked in a soft but sharp voice, one that could cut through steel.

“No need to,” Manon put the amplifier down on the gravel and pressed a finger against Celaena’s chest, pushing her back. “And don’t you dare speak to me like that again, kiddo.”

Celaena snapped the hand down, and in a second, Asterin and Sorrel showed up, standing one to each side of their sister.

“Is there a problem here?” Asterin asked.

“That’s what I want to know,” Celaena spit back. “What’s going on here?”

Sorrel laughed, a dry humorless laugh. “This one thinks the world revolves around her.”

Manon tsked, and Asterin laid a hand on her shoulder that Celaena wasn’t sure if it was a protective gesture, or a calming one to stop Manon from snapping.

“We are here as The Coven,” Asterin said in a calmed and calculated tone that managed to still sound warm and inviting. Clearly, she was the voice of reason out of the three. “And us being here tonight, has nothing to do with-” she dropped her voice to a whisper, “our other business.”

“Now,” Sorrel finished her sister’s sentence, “if you don’t mind, we need to pack our things.”

The three of them moved in unison, taking their equipment into the van as they threw side glances at her. Celaena was angry, but she wasn’t sure what she was angry at. Maybe it was Nehemia and her witty response in the bathroom earlier on, or the fact that she hadn’t seen Sam all night, or maybe it was the triplets showing up when she least expected them, throwing her off-balance. Having someone that knew her secret so close to the school was messing her up. She needed a purpose, something to do; and she needed it now.

“Do you have anything new?” She asked, her fists balled by her sides.

Without looking back, Manon replied, “All the images are crap, only someone’s back. We have the hint of a tattoo we think we might be able to work with though.”

“Can I see it?” She asked, thinking maybe she could recognize it, or go for a run around the lower neighborhoods, knocking on doors she hadn't been down to in a long while. Maybe one of the usual snitches could get her some information.

Manon sighed, but she made a motion with her hand, pointing towards Sorrel. “Just show her, so we can be out of here.”

Sorrel took a phone out of her pocket and moved her fingers quickly through the screen. “Done,” she said. “Check your phone,” she added as she put hers away and went back inside the gym.

“From now on,” Manon said, “approach us outside of the den, and our deal is off.” She made a motion as if slitting someone’s throat, and Celaena bit her lip not to chuckle. She could have taken all three sisters down in a matter of minutes. 

Instead, she looked down at her phone, and whatever she was thinking became irrelevant as she took in the shape of her aunt’s escort.

“Are you sure this is the one?”

“Do you know him?” Asterin asked her, her eyebrows raised.

Celeana simply turned around and rushed back into the gymnasium. It took her a minute to find Dorian, standing by the drink table while talking to Chaol.

“Hey,” she said, interrupting the conversation as she stood next to Dorian, “can you take me home?” She was already regretting not bringing her bike.

“Now? Are you okay?” Dorian put a hand over her forearm as he leaned in to talk to her, trying to be heard over the music.

“No,” she yelled back, “I’m not feeling great, I need to head back to the hotel,” she lied.

“Okay, sure,” Dorian seemed unsure about the change of plans, but he followed her gingerly as she made her way towards the main doors.

Celaena looked around the room, not sure what she was looking for as they walked. She spotted Elide in a corner, dancing next to Lorcan, who seemed utterly out of place as he stood still. She saw all the cheerleaders gathered around the Queen bee, dancing together and jumping around to the popular music playing. And there he was,  _ Sam _ . Had she been looking for him? Sam’s head was tilted to the roof, his hands up in the air, his hair messy and pointing all different ways. His hips were swaying from side to side as he danced next to a few kids she recognized from the team. She stopped dead on her tracks a few feet from the doors and Dorian bumped into her back. 

“Are you okay?” he yelled into her ear.

Sam was wearing a pair of leather brown pants, and he was shirtless, only wearing a cowboy vest over his naked chest. And he was swaying;  _ dancing _ . It was something Celaena had never seen before, and she thought she should go over, tell him what she had found, but then she noticed the way he was smiling, carefree, and it hit her. 

This was her battle, not Sam’s. 

Sam could have gotten himself tangled with Arobynn, but Maeve was her problem, her family. Her bone to pick. 

“Yeah, fine,” she muttered as she held onto Dorian’s wrist, pushing forward around the crowd until they made it out. “Sorry about this, but I’m feeling under the weather, and I need to be back to the hotel as soon as possible,” she blurted out once the music around them went quiet.

Not wasting a second, Dorian got the usher to get his car, and he opened up the door for her.

“Can I get you anything after I drop you off? Any pain killers? Anything at all?” He asked as they drove through town, the car slipping over the speed limit.

“Just get me there, that’s it,” she muttered, her eyes fixed on the screen of her phone.

“Are you sure? Don’t you want me to call a doctor?”

“It’s fine, it’s… it’s just my period,” she lied without thinking. 

Dorian went quiet, and Celaena stared at the photo. The image was a little blurry, not the best quality, but she had recognized him in the blink of an eye. The broad shoulders hiding underneath a black suit, the hair neatly combed back into a low ponytail, and the glimpse of a tattoo sneaking up the guy’s neck.

_ Rowan _ .

She had so many questions for him, and she planned to beat every answer out of him if it was necessary. 

As soon as Dorian dropped her, he convinced him that he should go back to the party, and she headed towards the elevator alone. She couldn’t waste a single second, so instead of going up, she headed straight to the basement. There was no point going to her room, she found her bike and grabbed a small screwdriver out of the unlocked compartment. She used it to pry open the lightbox by the wall and retrieved the keys she hid there for emergencies. She got rid of her heels and dropped them inside the under-seat storage compartment as she took out a pair of black leggings.

Thanking herself for always thinking about the unthinkable and being prepared, she put the leggings on under the dress and slid her feet onto her riding boots. She didn’t have a top to change into, but her leather jacket was there. Doubting herself for a second, and looking around to make sure she was alone in the garage, she took the dress off and over her head and put the jacket on top of her bralette, closing the zip all the way up. Folding the dress into a small ball, she put it inside the seats’ receptacle, then closed it off and jumped up.

As she started up her beloved bike, she wondered if she’d find Rowan at the apartment, or if she should try the Fossa first. Revving the engine and skidding out of the parking lot, she decided to head towards the apartment first, the rest… Only God knew where the night could take her, but she was all up for it. 


	29. Wrestle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello to all my lovely readers!!!  
> Okay, I have a confession to make... I don't have any more chapters written after this, and I'm not too sure when the next chapter will be ready T_T But I promise I'll do my best to have it in time to publish it in a week's time tops!! 
> 
> Life's just been busier than expected lately, and I've finally got a job that I love, but it Is also demanding, so I haven't been able to concentrate on my own stories as much as I'd like to, and I really don't want to push myself to just write it and drop the quality.
> 
> I have a huge outline of what's to happen, so don't worry, this story will keep going! I just may need a little patience <3
> 
> If you want, you can follow me on tumblr for some other random updates, my user there is knittingdreams n_n (Make sure you say hi so I know you came from here!!)
> 
> Okay, let's get on with it! Happy reading! <3
> 
> WARNING: PHYSICAL VIOLENCE

Rowan was still waiting by the shadows as the black motorbike roared out of the garage. He hadn’t expected Celaena to go back out, and he wasn’t sure why he was still waiting. Nehemia’s call a few minutes ago was still ringing in his ears.

_ Celaena left out of the blue. She’s gone with Dorian. Should I follow them? _

His answer had been quick as he was already in the neighborhood; he’d check on it.

_ I’m not obsessed _ , he told himself as he rolled out and followed the sound of the engine driving away. Fenrys was unsympathetic with everything Rowan was doing at the moment, but he couldn’t understand it the way he did. For Fenrys, this wasn’t personal as it was for him. And after so long, he finally had something else to motivate him, something else to keep him going apart from the debt he had to pay. Finally, he had hope that he could do more than just that. He could get his revenge. He could make a difference.

Rowan followed Celaena as she headed towards the city center, trying to stay out of sight. A few times, he saw her looking over her shoulder and tried to keep more distance, but he couldn't afford to lose her.  _ Where was she going? What was her real involvement in all of this? _ They weren’t too far from his neighborhood when Celaena turned a sharp corner and sped away towards the coast. Without hesitation, Rowan followed her, adrenaline rushing through his veins as he accelerated his motorcycle in a way he hadn’t done in a long time. The wind sang around him, and he cut through it, rushing around unused and deserted streets. 

_ She’d seen him. _

He knew it was futile, knew he should give up and let her go, but something kept him going. He had already lost her once the week before, he wasn’t going to do the same again. So like a fly following the light, he chased her.

Before long, they were almost at the docks, speeding around curve after curve as they trailed the cliffs on the back roads. The half-moon was low, filling the night with an eerie inkling that seemed to hang over Rowan’s head. He left some distance between them, thinking there was no other place for her to go rather than the pier, and watched the bike disappear after each curve. He was barely tailing her, the night quiet and frigid around him when he heard the sound of squealing tires and grinding breaks. 

Slowing down on instinct, he rolled around the next corner. The sight in front of him almost knocked him off his bike. The next curve nested a small resting area on the side, a lonely tree, and a single wooden table before the cliff cut down, nothing but open space and an imminent death waited past it. There were skid marks on the grass that led to a bike, toppled on its side by the edge, no rider to be seen. Rowan drove carefully off the road, got off his bike, and almost ran into the clearing, slowing down as he got closer.

_ It couldn’t be _ .

There was no way she had fallen over.

He was almost paralyzed, staring at the edge as memories from another death haunted him. It was his fault, for pushing too far. He had chased her towards her death.

A crunch sounded behind him, and before he could turn around, a shadow covered him whole and a heavyweight knocked him from behind as if someone had jumped onto him.

_ Had she jumped from the freaking tree? _

Rowan was pinned to the floor, but he rolled over, throwing his attacker over his shoulder. He wasn’t surprised to see Celaena in a fighting stance when he got up, crunched down low almost like an animal, hungry for its prey. He lifted his hands, trying to calm her down, but his helmet was still on, and she had no idea who he was.

Celaena surged forward in a movement he had seen her do at the Fossa, so he was fast enough to dodge, rolling over to one side.

“Hey, hey,” he said, lifting his hands again and putting them to each side of his helmet, “it’s just me.”

As he took it off, Celaena’s eyes opened up wider, and then a chilling smirk formed on her lips

“Just the rat I was looking for,” she snarled. And then charged again.

Rowan lifted his forearms just in time to block a blow that would’ve otherwise knocked him out and he pushed her back, throwing a tentative punch.

“Why were you following me? What does she want?” Celaena snarled, her leg going straight to his face, his forearm blocking it just in time once more.

He couldn’t reply, he couldn’t tell her why he had been following her, he couldn’t sell Nehemia.

“What do you want with Maeve?” he asked instead, the name making Celaena flinch and take a step back.

Shaking her head, she counter-attacked with another question. “Why are you working for her? What do  _ you  _ know?”

Their fists flew one way and the other as they circled each other, moving almost in synchronicity. 

“I know enough,” he spat without thinking. “What are  _ you  _ after?”

_ Why was she a part of the tournament? _ A wealthy girl like her, it still made no sense. He didn’t want to believe she could be working for Maeve, but the truth was that a lot of her mules were young kids that ended up with more money than they could deal with. But Nehemia had said Celaena was on a full scholarship, something wasn’t adding up.

“What do you want?” he asked again.

Her face turned into an unreadable mask as she threw another punch, and he blocked it. She kicked his ribs, and he dodged to one side. She advanced, and he retreated.

“Are you holding back?” she yelled as her fist missed his face by an inch, Rowan’s body shooting backward.

“Yes,” he breathed out. He side-stepped, and Celaena threw a low kick. Rowan jumped over her leg and stepped to the other side.

“Is it because I’m a girl?” 

Rowan threw a punch, but it was almost half-hearted, and Celaena easily moved back to avoid it. She pushed forward, and Rowan took a few steps back, getting dangerously close to the edge of the cliff.

“No,” he finally replied, “I’ve seen you fight, remember? I know full well I don’t need to hold back.” He pressed forward, throwing a combination of punches that was only meant to drive her back. She obliged, stepping back a few times and then moving to the side, circling him again and leaving the cliff to their right.

“Then why do you keep dancing?”

That’s what it was, a dance. They kept twirling around each other, punching without hitting, kicking without inflicting any real pain, and she looked conflicted about it.

“Because I don’t want to fight,” Rowan admitted, surprising even himself by the statement. 

Her expression was pained, but Celaena used his second of doubt to jump forward, her fist colliding against his jaw. Rowan staggered back, tripped over an overgrown root from the tree behind him, and fell onto his back. Before he could stand up, Celaena jumped on top of him, her forearm pressing against his throat as she took a knife out of her boot. She rested the edge of the blade on his cheek, their breaths ragged.

“I’ll ask again, why are you holding back?”

“Because-” he felt the dagger biting into his skin, and to his surprise, Celaena eased the pressure as he felt the warmth of blood trickling down his chin. “I don’t want to hurt you,” he whispered.

At the last word, his hand snapped Celaena’s knife to the side as his head surged forward, hitting her forehead hard and making her fall backward. Before she could react, Rowan jumped on top of her, the blade gone, his legs straddled to each side of her body, keeping her pinned to the floor. He held both her hands over her head, and took a deep breath, trying not to lose himself. She was just a kid, a lost kid, and he could help her. 

“It doesn’t look like it,” she spat, but her eyes were unfocused, her blinking too slow.

_ Had he hit her head too hard? _

“You’re giving me no choice, this is probably the only way I can get you to stop, and listen,” he said slowly, trying to keep his cool. Celaena’s hair was wild, what had probably been an intricate up-do a few hours ago was now a birds’ nest, but still… She looked fierce, as strong as ever, and it tugged at something inside of Rowan’s chest. She couldn’t be working for Maeve, he didn’t want to believe it, she was too proud for that, she was a fighter, not a fucking dealer. She swallowed hard, her breathing still ragged, and Rowan had the sudden urge to bite her exposed neck.

Not giving him time to process that thought, Celaena used Rowan’s move against him and headbutted him at the same time as she fanned her legs over, throwing Rowan to one side and attempting to straddle over him. He pushed her off, not wanting to be trapped again, and the motion got Celaena rolling further away. Rowan watched in horror as she tried to stand, too close to the edge, shook her head in confusion, and then staggered back, loose rocks sliding where her feet were planted.

“Nooooo,” the scream seemed to come from far away, but also, from too close. It took Rowan a while to realize the sound had come from his own lips.

So many things happened at the same time, and as the scream pierced the world, Celaena fell.

His brain in a fog, he jumped forward, holding onto whatever he could. He barely caught Celaena’s ankle, his hand holding on with as much strength as he could muster as his other hand held onto a root not to be dragged down. He felt a tug on his shoulder, the whole of Celaena’s dead weight pulling at his muscles, but he ignored the pain as best as he could.

“Celaena!” 

The girl hung upside down, her arms stretched over her head, motionless. The weight was pulling on his shoulder, and Rowan pulled back until only an inch of his torso was hanging off the edge. Being sure that he wasn’t going to slide any further, he let go of the root and grabbed onto her leg with both hands. 

“Celaena! Can you hear me?”

She moaned, a small and broken noise, and then she started to stir.

“Celaena! I can’t hold on for much longer!” Rowan grunted, and his hand slipped an inch.

Reality seemed to hit her like a rock, and Celeana jerked suddenly and then stilled. She took a hand to the back of her head, slowly, and then crunched up. 

She looked at him with a half-smirk on her face, her eyes a little dazed. “Hey,” she said, “you look like you’re struggling.”

_ How could she joke in such a situation? _

“Can you reach up?”

He could feel his fingers cramping, the smooth fabric of Celaena’s pants slowly slipping off. 

“Of course,” she said as if her life didn’t depend on it, as if the cliff was only another game, another fight, another challenge. But Rowan could see there was something different in her expression, a slight scowl, a tightness to her lips, her pupils so dilated her eyes seemed almost black.

Celaena crunched back up, her body folding in half gracefully as she reached over and grabbed onto each of Rowan’s wrists. He heard a grunt, but Celaena managed to smirk again.

“At the count of three,” she said, “let go of my ankles and hold onto my wrists. Can you do that? I’m not ready to plummet onto my death,” she joked.

Startled by the humor, Rowan nodded once, taking a deep breath and bracing himself for the worst. 

“One,” Rowan felt the pressure of Celaena’s hands squeezing his wrists.

“Two,” her face was impossibly calmed, her features unreadable again.  _ What had this girl been through? _

“Three.”

Rowan let go and flipped his wrists to hold onto Celaena’s. Like something out of a cheerleading movie, Celaena straddled her legs, drawing a huge circle as her feet went down, and using the impulse of the downward motion, she kicked her feet against the cliff-wall, pushing herself upwards. Rowan pulled at the same time, getting her over the edge. They both rolled over on the grass, their bodies getting as far away from the precipice as possible.

Allowing his heart to beat wildly, Rowan sat up, holding his head in his palms, his eyes closed for a moment. 

“I guess you saved my life,” Celaena muttered between pants.

Rowan didn’t answer, instead, he looked over at her and his heart stilled in his chest. 

Celaena was lying facedown, her head resting against her arms and hidden behind a mess of hair. Her leggings were barely reaching her hip bones, and her jacket was lifted enough to show the skin of her lower back. If he could even call that skin. He had never seen anything like it. Rowan had seen his fair share of scars at the Fossa, all kinds of nasty cuts, even burned skin. But the sight in front of him, it had stolen the air out of his lungs, crumpled his heart, and churned his stomach.

The scars were so close together, that there wasn’t an inch of smoothness between them. They were like a criss-cross of ragged cuts, all different lengths, different angles, and he could even guess, different depths.

When she looked up and found him staring, her lips paled, and she rolled over, staggering back until her back hit the trunk of the tree behind her. 

Rowan’s voice came out broken as he felt sick to his stomach and asked the only question inhabiting his mind. 

“What happened to you?” 


	30. Getting close to the truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Anxiety attack. 
> 
> Hey there! OMG! I'm so happy to be here to tell you that.... I WROTE 4 CHAPTERS YESTERDAY!!!! :D
> 
> This means I'll be able to update a little more often again! I'll try to update twice a week if I keep writing live I've had n_n
> 
> Thanks to @fleetingpieces I now have a pretty clear idea of where this story is going and I've drafted most of it. So, time to get back to writing! There's a lot of exciting things coming, so hold on tight and let's go on an amazing roller coaster ride!! :D

“What happened to you?” Rowan’s voice was soft but it cut through the tension in the air like a hot knife slicing butter.

She pressed her eyes shut and shook her head, feeling lightheaded now that the adrenaline had worn off. She heard the crunching of leaves, Rowan probably trying to get closer to her, and the images on her head split her down the middle. She clutched her stomach, bile climbing up her throat as she leaned to one side, retching. She could feel Rowan lingering on the edge of her blurry vision. 

“Are you okay?” 

She lifted a hand trying to keep him away and then retched again, nothing coming out; just memories trying to push their way out of her body. She wiped her forehead and then touched the back of her head; her hand came out bloody and sticky. She barely recalled the fall and the way her head had hit the rocky side of the cliff, but the blood on her hand was nothing compared to what she had been through before. But still, the memories came back to her like a movie playing inside her mind. She took a deep breath. There had been so much blood, so much pain. She breathed again. She recalled the sound of glass breaking and her stomach knotted again, her pulse going wild.

“I can take you to Fenrys, he can look into that wound. I promise you, I have no ill intentions,” Rowan’s voice cut through the spiral and Celaena told herself to concentrate on the sound of it, on what was in front of her.

She looked up, felt the grass underneath her, smelled the ocean, and pushing herself from the trunk -its bark rough against her calloused hands- she stood on trembling legs. 

“Why were you following me? Why… Why work for Maeve? Why…” She staggered to the side and held herself back up, a hand braced against the tree. “I can’t trust you,” she stated matter-of-factly.

She hated feeling this weak, she hadn’t felt like this since the fight with Cain, and that was another episode she didn’t want to think about. She was Fireheart, she was strong, she was fierce. 

Still, her vision was clouded with shiny spots.

_ Bloody physical limitations _ , she thought with a grunt.

“But you trusted Fenrys,” Rowan said, and for a second, she thought he sounded hurt. “You trusted him before, you can trust him again.”

“It was life or death, it was different. And you’re not Fenrys.” 

A flicker of pain passed through Rowan’s face, but it was gone in a second.

“It’s the same thing... And I don’t think you should ride like this,” he stated, pointing at her bike still lying on its side. “Let me take you home, take you somewhere, anywhere,” he insisted.

Celaena knew she was in no condition to ride, but she wasn’t going to give him that pleasure. She could ride a few blocks and then rest on the side of the road. Wait until she was better and then head back to the hotel. She walked to her bike and lifted it with a grunt. Sometimes her body felt like a cage, like a limitation to everything she could’ve been; and no matter how much she trained, injuries always happened, and her body always pushed her back one way or another. 

It was utterly frustrating.

It reminded her of the endless nights locked in her room, unable to move, barely able to eat… She shook the memories away, trying to keep them at bay.

Rowan went the other way, lifted his own bike, and picked up his helmet from where it had rolled off to. 

“Please?” He sighed. “I’ll take you to see Fenrys, we’ll make sure you’re fine, you can get changed into something clean and appropriate to walk back into the hotel with, and then I’ll get Connall to come with me to pick up your bike. After we know you’re fine, I’ll answer some of your questions if you want. We can sort this out. I promise it’s not what it looked like... I’m pretty certain we’re on the same side of this struggle.”

The sound of his voice was the only thing grounding Celaena enough to stay in the present, so she pushed a little, trying to keep him talking.

“It looked like you were following me,” she tried to add as much sass to her voice as possible, but she knew she sounded weaker than normal and she hated herself for it.

“Well, then I guess it was what it looked like.” Rowan rubbed a hand through his hair, and then scratched his stubble. Despite it all, Celaena had to bite her lip not laugh at his expression. There was a cute half-smirk curving his lips, and she thought he should do that more often… Smile. It looked good on him. “But I can explain why, okay? I just need to make sure you’re not about to die before that, or else there’s someone out there who’ll have my balls for it.”

Was he talking about Fenrys? Or Maeve? She couldn’t concentrate enough to worry about that just yet, so she looked at the little scratch on the paint from the moment she dropped her bike to the ground in a rush to climb the tree and rubbed her thumb through it. 

If she went with Rowan, that meant she could get the information she was after, and logically thinking, she had been at his place before and nothing bad had happened, so she guessed she could at least give him the benefit of the doubt. If not for Rowan, at least for Fenrys. After all, she had been heading towards his apartment, hadn’t she? And deep -very deep- down she was afraid to be alone, the memories still pressing hard to get her full attention. Compressing her chest, making her heart race.

“Okay,” she mumbled begrudgingly. 

Celaena grabbed her helmet off the floor and putting it on, she crossed her arms over her chest.

“But with one condition,” she added, flipping the visor up. “We ride on my bike, I’m not leaving my baby behind again.”

Rowan shook his head, but to her surprise, he agreed. He parked his bike next to the tree, out of sight from the road, and then jumped on hers. Celaena climbed up behind him, feeling out of place in the back of her own bike. As he started the engine, Rowan asked her to hold on to him.

“No need,” she noted, holding onto the side of the seat.

“Don’t be stubborn, you passed out a few minutes ago.” 

Rowan reached back, grabbed Celaena’s hands, and looped them around his middle, making sure she was holding on tight. He kept his palms pressing her hands down against his stomach for a second longer than needed, as if urging her to hold on, daring her to deny him again. 

She didn’t… she could feel his abdominal muscles under her palms, only a thin layer between them. She tried to breathe as lightly as possible. 

“Just... Don’t get the wrong idea,” she snarled. But her chest was pressed against his back and she could feel the muscles shifting, tensing, taunting her. As they rode out of the resting area and back onto the road, Celaena’s hand tightened on instinct against Rowan’s stomach, his abdomen contracting as he leaned forward and accelerated.

It was the closest contact Celaena had ever had with a man, and if it wasn’t for her mind spiraling into dark corners, she thought she would’ve enjoyed it. He could be a jerk, but she wasn’t blind, Rowan was a sight to behold, and that single smile he had shown her… It’d done things to her. Things she didn’t want to think about. 

Things she didn’t have time for. 

***

As soon as they opened the door to Rowan’s apartment, the smell of fresh bread drifted out the door, accompanied by the sound of a familiar voice that seemed to come from the kitchen.

“Rowan, is that you? I thought you were going straight to work.” The thought was confirmed within a second as Fenrys walked into the lounge from the kitchen area.

Celaena couldn’t help herself, she snickered.

It was well past dinner time, and Fenrys was now standing in the middle of the lounge wearing a flower-patterned apron over his bare chest. His face was covered in smudges of flour, and he had two matching oven mitts on, like it was the most normal thing in the world. His eyes widened for a second when he saw Celaena, and a huge smile spread on his face.

“Hey!” The happy greeting was directed at her, but before Celaena could reply, Fenrys’ eyes seemed to take over the state of both her and Rowan; their dirty clothes and bruised bodies. Rowan had dried blood on his cheek, and she was sure her hair looked like a nest. “What happened? Who did you run into? Was it Cain again?”

Fenrys approached them as he spoke. He took one mitt off and held Celaena’s chin with two warm fingers and turned her face one way and the other. He glanced at Rowan afterward and his concerned expression warmed Celaena’s heart.

“No, it was just…” Rowan trailed off, as if not knowing how to finish the sentence.

“It was just us,” Celaena finished for him.

“Did you… have an accident?” Fenrys looked utterly confused.

Rowan closed the door behind him and headed towards the couch. It was like a silent order and both Celaena and Fenrys followed, seating one on each of the armchairs to his sides. Rowan opened and closed his mouth as if not sure which part of the story to tell, so Celaena cut in.

“Rowan followed me, and then pushed me off a cliff,” she said nonchalantly.

“You, what?!” Fenrys stood up, looking back and forth between his friends. 

“Hey!” Rowan looked directly at her with a reproaching scowl, “you were the one that jumped on me from a tree!”

“You did what?” Fenrys now stared at her, biting his lip not to laugh.

“I didn’t know it was you following me! But I would’ve done the same if I did know…”

“And the knife? Was it necessary to pull a knife on me?”

“You had me pinned down,” Celaena shrugged. “And at least I didn’t try to kill you by pushing you off a cliff,” her tone was still flat, almost rid of any emotion.

Rowan huffed, exasperated.

“I didn’t push you, you fell, and need I remind you that I saved you?” Rowan’s arms were crossed over his chest, and Fenrys was still looking back and forth between them, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

“I feel like I’m missing something here,” he said. “And while you explain, I’d like to know which injuries I need to look at. But first, give me a second, I’ll go put away these mitts and the apron and wash my hands.”

“You should also wash your face,” Celaena stated as he walked towards the kitchen.

“And put on a shirt,” Rowan added.

The lounge faded into silence as Fenrys walked back out of the kitchen a second later and headed towards the bathroom in the back. The sound of a tap being opened reached them from the hallway, and Celaena bit the inside of her cheek. Rowan was looking down at his knees, one hand scratching the back of his neck as his other arm rested a bit awkwardly over the armrest. Celaena on the other hand had her eyes focused on the roof, trying to pretend like she wasn’t glancing at Rowan every other second.

“You’ve hurt your shoulder, didn’t you?” she almost whispered, still not looking at him.

“It’s nothing,” Rowan shook his head and finally looked at her, so she looked too. “I shouldn’t have followed you like that, I should’ve gone looking for you like a normal person would’ve.”

“That almost sounded like an apology,” Celaena smirked and Rowan shook his head once more. 

“Okay, let’s look at you two,” Fenrys re-entered the room wearing a gym singlet with a kitten eating a pizza printed on it, and a neckline so low that his nipples were almost showing. Rowan shook his head at the sight and took a hand to his forehead. Fenrys put the first aid kit on the small table between them, and took a seat on it.

“You talk, I’ll work,” he stated.

They told him what had happened while he looked at Celaena’s wounds, checking the bruise on her cheek first and making sure her pupils were reacting to the light. He made her sit on the floor in front of him afterward as he tried to wipe some of the blood away from her hair with a wet cloth, and then looked at the small cut there.

“It’s not too bad, and I highly doubt you want a stitch. It’d hurt like hell, and it will most likely heal on its own, just try not to… Hell, don’t worry, you’ll do whatever you want no matter what I say, but you should keep it on the down-low for a bit, you might have a concussion,” he finished, squeezing her shoulders once before letting her know she could move back to the couch.

“Thanks, doc,” she winked at him as she sat, and Fenrys laughed out loud.

“You sure are something…” he muttered. “Rowan, need me to check that shoulder?”

“It’s fine.”

“Did you dislocate it again?” Fenrys insisted, swiveling to the side to be in front of Rowan and leaning forward while resting his hands on his knees.

“Hell, it’s- Fuck!” Whatever Rowan was about to say was cut short as Fenrys moved swiftly towards him and grabbed his arm. He’d pushed it up, and Rowan had almost jumped off the couch, a pained expression on his face.

“As I thought,” Fenrys chuckled. “You’re so stupidly stubborn, don’t you have work in like…” he looked at his watch and scowled, “half an hour?”

“Yes, and that’s why it doesn’t matter, I need to go.”

“You owe me an explanation!” Celaena snapped, making both friends turn around to her. “You can’t just leave now, you said you’d explain what in Hell is going on, starting by telling me why you were following me.”

A moment of tense silence passed between them. There was no way she was going to leave that apartment before she got answers, and Rowan and Fenrys looked unsure about how to proceed. Rowan had adopted a dark expression, his shoulders drawn and his gaze down as Fenrys was looking at him, something like concern showing in his eyes.

“Rowan,” he said softly, “I think it’s time you tell her about Lyria.”

Rowan’s eyes snapped up so fast that Celaena almost missed the flash of pain at the mention of his ex-girlfriend’s name.

“I…”

“Don’t say you can’t, I know you do… It’s time,” Fenrys’ tone was still soft, barely more than a whisper. He sounded like a completely different person to the funny, charming, and careless Fenrys that Celaena was used to. “I can take over your shift, no one will care about it, we swap shifts often enough. You two stay here, talk about what’s going on, and don’t you dare leave this place until we are all on the same page. I know you’re both on the same side, so please, just talk it through, don’t be like those stupid TV shows where there’s only drama because people are unable to share information.”

The two flatmates shared a long and silent conversation as they stared into each other’s eyes, and finally, Rowan nodded.

“If we’re gonna do this, I’m gonna need a drink. Celaena, do you drink?”

“Just water will do,” she said slowly. 

She was left alone in the lounge as Rowan headed towards the kitchen and Fenrys went back to his room. Her mind was reeling with possibilities of what was about to be revealed to her. What did Fenrys mean when he stated they were both on the same side? She was sure as Hell not on her aunt’s side and she knew for a fact they were working for Meave, so it didn’t make sense. But she needed information, she had to know what was going on and she hoped these people had helpful information.

By the time Rowan returned from the kitchen with a glass of whiskey in one hand and water in the other, Fenrys was emerging back from the hallway wearing a black t-shirt and a jacket over his shoulders.

“No leaving until this is resolved,” he said pointing a finger at Celaena. “You can do this,” he added in that soft tone as he looked at his friend. Celaena had to bite her tongue not to make a joke about Fenrys’ change of attire before work, and the only thing that stopped her was the look in Rowan’s eyes. It was like he wasn’t even in the room with them anymore.

“Yeah, whatever,” Rowan murmured.

As Fenrys closed the front door behind him, Rowan sighed loudly. A long moment passed before he took a sip of his drink, closing his eyes for a moment before looking up at her. 

“There’s a story you need to hear… A story about how Fenrys, Connall, and I got to know each other and how… How we got involved with Maeve.”


	31. Digging into the past

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: There's dealing with loss in this chapter, mention of drug abuse, alcohol, and death. 
> 
> Please be careful if any of this triggers you, and don't read if it will. Take care of yourself <3   
> I can always summarise the chapter for you if you don't feel comfortable reading, just let me know and I will do so :)

Celaena wasn’t sure how to feel about any of it. Being back at Rowan’s apartment after rolling in the dirt with him and almost falling off a cliff was… Well, awkward. And knowing he was about to open up to her and let her in on the truth, it was jarring. So she took a deep breath, and let her barriers down if even just a little.

“And what does that have to do with… Lyria?” she asked Rowan as he admitted his involvement with Maeve.

“Everything,” he said dryly. He wasn’t looking at her while he spoke and she could understand how it was easier to look away while letting out hard truths. She knew a lot about dealing with them, even if she wasn’t good at talking about them out loud either.

“I’m listening,” the Aelin side of her said gently, “take your time.”

At the softness of her voice, Rowan glanced up between his lashes, probably surprised by her reasonable and calmed tone.

“You only know one side of me,” she said, her tone still controlled, “but there’s so much more you don’t know so… Don’t think I can’t feel your pain, or understand it. I do. I know… I know how hard it is to talk about these things,” she admitted.

She’d been through so much in the last couple of weeks, even months. It was like being back on that cliff, hanging down while barely awake. There had been a second there when she woke up and hadn’t known where she was, and the panic from every near-death experience she’d lived had come back to haunt her. People always said she was fearless, but it wasn’t the lack of fear that kept her going, it was the fear itself. Fear for her life, fear for what would happen if she couldn’t reclaim her rightful place in the world. Fear of living under Arobynn’s thumb forever, like a thug, like a purposeless fighter. 

She wanted to fight for a reason. For herself, for freedom, for her life. She’d been face to face with death and made it out alive. She wasn’t ready to give up on that, on the second chance that she’d been given. Celaena had to believe all the pain, the years of torture while living with Arobynn, every combat session, every break-in, it all had to be worth something… Because otherwise, what was the point of it all?

Rowan looked at her in the eyes while all these thoughts clouded her mind and for a second, she thought he could see it all on her face.

“Fenrys was right,” he finally muttered.

“About?”

“You sure are something…”

_ What did that even mean? _

“I’m not  _ something _ ,” she replied in a tired tone, “I’m barely someone, if even that.”

She wasn’t even someone, was she? She was pieces of three different someones. She was partly Aelin, part Celaena, and also Fireheart, but most of the time, she felt unable to tie those three personalities into oneself. She was fragmented, and she didn’t know how to hold all those pieces together. She’d been torn over and over again, her lungs filled with water, her family ripped from her, her inheritance unattainable, her body maimed, scarred, torn, broken. 

Cut into ribbons. Left alone to heal.

“Lyria… She was something too. But… It took me too long to realize she wasn’t the… good kind of something, she had lost herself...” Rowan talked slowly, every word a struggle as it left his lips.

Celaena leaned back onto the armchair and drew her legs up to her chest, hugging her knees as she listened while Rowan took one last deep breath and downed the remaining whisky before starting his story.

“I was in middle school when I met Lyria. We went to school together for many years after that, became friends almost at the start. By the time we were both juniors… It was obvious there was something else between us. Still, it took me all year to gather up the courage to say something to her, and it wasn’t till junior prom that I finally did. I asked her to go to the dance with me, and she said yes. We spent all that summer together, walking down to the pier, enjoying picnics by the beach… Hiking through the hills. We were… it was a good summer,” he confided with a sad smile.

“It was at the end of that summer that I met Fenrys and Connall, they… they were Lyria’s second cousins removed or something similar… Their families were never too close, but we ran into them during that summer, and something clicked between us. The twins were older and wiser, or that’s what we stupidly thought. They were in a bit of a rebel phase, and so was Lyria, and I think that’s what drew them together. She wanted in on the liquor, on the parties, on the adventures... And I wanted her, so I followed along.

“The first half of the year after that went by so fast, I can barely remember any of it. We went to school during the week and snuck up here -to Fenrys and Connall’s apartment- most weekend nights. I went along to most of the parties, but never felt like I was there. I still remember those places as if looking at them through a dirty mirror. All those nights seem like just one moment, one single event, endless and pointless. But Lyria loved them. She loved to dance, loved the attention, and I like to believe, she loved me too.”

The last words left Rowan’s lips forcefully as if saying that out loud was the hardest thing to admit. Celeana rested her chin on her knees and watched him, waiting for him to keep talking. There was nothing for her to say, no point trying to dull his ache when it was so obvious that the memories were ripping Rowan apart. And all she could do was hug her legs tighter so she wouldn’t do anything stupid, so she wouldn’t try to comfort him because she knew that’s not what he wanted.  _ What could she give him anyway? _ She knew about pain, but nothing about making it better.

“The second half of senior year was rough,” he continued after a small pause. “Lyria’s mother passed away and her father started drinking. She relied on Fenrys and Connall more than before, but they were -unbelievably- starting to get out of their party phase. The late nights at the flat turned into endless videogames and a few beers going around and it didn’t seem to be enough for her. I tried… I tried to give her everything. I was there every step of the way, through every tantrum and every weak sobbing moment. She was strong, and she didn’t want my help, but what else was I meant to do? By the end of the year, she told me she wanted to move out of her house, and she… She asked me to marry her.” He paused, looking down at the floor and rubbing the spot where a ring would’ve been. “So I did.”

Rowan got up from the couch and headed back to the kitchen, returning with a fresh glass of whiskey that he sat on the table after a single sip.  _ He’d been married _ ? Celaena didn’t know what to think and she tried to stop her brain from thinking altogether, trying to concentrate on what was important, waiting for the part where her aunt showed up in the story.

“I wanted to do things right, so I bought a ring and proposed to her during prom night. We got married a week after that, a small ceremony with just us and our witnesses. Afterward, she wanted us to move together, but being honest, we didn’t have much money. I had some savings from jobs I’d been doing here and there, so we offered to rent the spare room in this apartment while we saved some more for our own place. It was meant to be for twelve months…. And it was, at least for her.” There was a tense pause before Rowan finished his sentence. “She passed away before the end of that first year.”

Celaena thought about the room at the end of the hall, the one she’d been in with Rowan that one time Lorcan had shown up in the apartment. She thought about the look on his face when he’d seen her sitting on his bed. Thought about the dinosaur pajamas that seemed too small to fit his hips, and about the way he always seemed to know what she needed. Her heart squeezed on her chest.

She’d treated him like crap, thinking him a brooding annoying guard that knew nothing about life, but the man sitting now in front of her had lived more than she could even fathom. He’d loved and married at an age where she didn’t even know what it felt like to kiss someone, to  _ really _ kiss someone (that peck with Sam didn’t count), and that made her feel so naive. So clueless about everything. So out of his league.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“And what exactly are you sorry for?” he asked, finally looking back at her.

“For misjudging you,” she said honestly. 

“Don’t,” he replied dryly. “Don’t pity me.”

“I don’t,” she whispered after a moment. “But I understand, I know exactly what it feels like to lose someone you love.” 

Rowan seemed to think this over, and it looked like he was about to ask her something, but he finally shook his head and finished his story.

“So,” he said, “when we moved here, I thought things were good. Lyria seemed to have relaxed a bit, she cut her relationship with her father and eased up on the parties. She got a job in town at a little cafe, and I was working in construction while I trained to become a judo instructor. I’d been into all different kinds of martial arts since I was a freshman, and I decided I enjoyed it enough to make a living out of it. I spent a lot of time away and when I returned home… Sometimes Lyria would be in bed, asleep already, and other times she wouldn’t even be here. She’d text me in the middle of the night letting me know she was covering a late shift at the cafe or the bar next door. I believed her. Why wouldn’t I? She’d never lied to me, and I…”

“And you loved her,” Celaena filled in a tiny voice.

“Yes,” Rowan admitted. “I would’ve done anything for her.”

“So... what happened? How does Maeve tie into all of this?” Celeana leaned forward, her neck pressed against her knees as she hugged her legs tighter, too scared to hear the end of the story.

“Drugs,” he said in a flat tone, closing his eyes.

When he opened them again after a minute, the intensity of the green irises looking back at her almost made her flinch.

“Lyria had been buying drugs without any of us finding out, she was… Dealing for her, for Maeve. There was no bar, no cafe, no other job. Only drugs. The problem was that she wasn’t selling enough, and she always wanted more, so she started consuming what she was meant to be selling. She…”

Celaena knew the end of the story before Rowan could muster the strength and the courage to say it out loud.

“I understand,” she said. “You don’t need to say it.”

Rowan’s eyes were closed again, his breathing shallow. “But I have to,” he said. He took a sip of his whiskey, placed it back on the table between them, and looked up to the roof. Or maybe the sky. “She overdosed,” he managed to say.

Celaena closed her eyes, the pain on Rowan’s face was too much to handle. She knew a whole lot about pain, about losing the people she loved, but this… losing someone to their own actions? Not having been able to realize what was happening before it was too late? She could only imagine the guilt he’d been carrying with him all this time.

“Fenrys was the one that found her,” he said after a few minutes of silence. “He still blames himself for it, and that’s why…” He trailed off, shaking his head again. “Lyria left a huge debt behind. And I mean it,  _ huge _ . There was… it’s complicated. I was held accountable for her debt and tried to get more hours in construction, but the money was barely enough to pay for rent because there was one less person to split it with. I had to ditch my judo classes as I couldn’t afford them and…” He sighed again, the story taking a toll on him. “Fenrys was in med school by then, so Connall was the one paying for almost everything for the two of them. Money was tight, it was complicated, we were living on two-minute noodles, all our money going to Maeve while we tried to pay the debt. Then… Connall started dealing. He was the first one to fall for Maeve’s threats. He… he started consuming too, and this is probably not my story to tell, but you need to understand why we’re involved with her. I had to come to an arrangement, we wanted Connall out of the drug business as fast as possible. We couldn’t risk losing someone else to it, so Fenrys and I talked to Maeve and struck a deal. 

“We’d work for her as security guards until the debts were paid. We managed to convince her to move Connal to the security team with us after a short few months, and thank the gods he got out of it in time. We don’t really… we don’t talk much about it. None of it. We’ve been buying our time, trying to pay back what we owe to get out of it, but the debt seems to never end. She keeps finding reasons to deduct more money from our pay, to increase our debts.”

“She… she sounds like a monster,” Celaena said in a tiny voice.

“She’s dangerous,” Rowan replied. “What happened with Cain? Why do you think I warned you not to finish your fights so fast on the first night? The Fossa is about the show, not the fighting itself. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was the one to send him after you. It’s the kind of thing she’d do.”

Celaena let that truth hit her in full. Her aunt. The woman that had looked after her, bought her dolls, and told her bedtime stories when her parents worked till late, was getting kids involved with drugs. She had gotten Lyria killed when she was barely 19 years old. How was that different from orchestrating a plane crash?

She felt her heart racing, and every single truth she’d been trying to deny seemed to crash down on her. Her aunt was capable of horrible things. Her aunt had probably killed her parents. She had people fighting in basements for money, she’d probably sent someone after her, to kill her -again-, maybe even worse than that. 

“How long has it been?” she asked, needing to hear his voice again, needing him to keep her away from the spiral. He’d told her he was 22, so it had been a while since Lyria had died, but he was still paying the price for it.

“It’s been 3 years, 2 months, and 8 days since the night Lyria passed away,” Rowan replied, and the precision of it ripped Celaena from her spiral and threw her right back into the present. 

“So… how does this all connect to you following me?” she asked after a few unbearable silent minutes, trying to change the subject even if slightly. 

“That…” He seemed guilty, finally looking at her after such a long time of them trying to divert their eyes from each other. “I’m sorry about that, I saw you at that gala last weekend, the one you attended with Dorian. I added two plus two after that.”

“You discovered where I go to school I guess, and that I’ve been staying at the Havilliard hotel,” Celaena finished for him.

“Yes, and well… I was around the neighborhood tonight, and I saw you arriving with Dorian Jr., and then saw you leaving a minute later... In the middle of the night. It was suspicious,” he shrugged. “I’ve been trying to build a case against Maeve, to find something that would help me stop what she’s doing… I don’t want any more girls suffering what Lyria did. I’m not sure why I followed you, I just knew you were involved in all of this somehow, and I guess I wanted to know  _ how _ . I was scared that maybe...”

“That maybe I was following the path Lyria did,” she finished. He looked at her in the eyes, and Celaena lifted her chin from her knees. “I guess this is the part where I tell you my side of the story, right?” 

She could hear the sadness in her own voice and wondered how to say all that needed to be said without telling the whole truth. She couldn’t talk about her real identity, but she could do right by him and let him know just enough. Enough for them to work together, enough to get close to her aunt and find proof of what she was sure Maeve had done to her parents.

Celaena dropped her feet to the floor and leaned forward, grabbing Rowan’s glass of whiskey from the table. 

“I might as well take this from you now,” she said, and before she could regret her decision, she took a big gulp. 


	32. Burning from within

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! So sorry it took a bit longer than expected to update! I'm still on "holidays" so I get days a bit mixed up, but at the same time, I'm also still working remotely so yeah... My head is a mess! xD
> 
> I will try to go back to posting on Tuesdays from next week onward and see how that goes! (But that means I need to hurry and finish writing the chapter that's been sitting open on my computer for 2 weeks now, oops!)
> 
> Will see how this goes!
> 
> TRIGGER WARNINGS: This chapter deal with some heavy stuff as you might imagine with Celaena telling her story, so know that there will be mentions of violence (a bit rougher than what you've read so far), blood, anxiety and panic attacks. If any of this triggers you, please don't read, send me a msg and I'll be happy to cut out whatever triggers you out of the chapter for you or give you a summary of what you need to know to keep reading <3
> 
> Take care, and much love!

The feeling of the whiskey burning her throat was like nothing she’d experienced before. But the physical pain was better than the emotional one, so she took another sip before letting the first sentence out of her mouth. She’d decided to start with one of the hardest ones.

“My parents died when I was young,” Celaena said, and the truth tasted so foreign that she had to down it with another sip of the spicey drink.

“Would you like me to pour some more?” Rowan asked hesitantly, but already getting up from his seat.

Celaena nodded and waited for Rowan to half-disappear into the open plan kitchen and come back with two bottles and another glass. 

“Would you prefer something a little sweeter?” He lifted one of the bottles, the one that probably wasn’t what she was drinking.

“Sweeter, always,” she replied without even thinking.

She’d never been one to drink. She’d tried a few alcoholic beverages here and there in the past, but her life had always been on the line, so being intoxicated had been the biggest ‘no’ in her life. No one ever told her not to drink, like with everything in life, she had learned what was best for her survival the hard way. Celaena had been like a caged animal, learning by trial and error. One too many drinks and her reflexes hadn’t been good enough, earning her a sprained ankle and a possible broken rib. She hadn’t drunk ever since.

But it was different somehow, being there with Rowan in a place she was now almost comfortable to be in. After all, he’d saved her life, and even if she knew she should be scared, she wasn’t. In that particular second, fear was not one of her concerns. 

She wasn’t brave, she was comfortable.

Rowan poured a few fingers of the amber drink on the short glass and passed it over to her. She took a small sip, glad to find that Rowan had been right, the drink was sweeter and easier to drink. There was a hint of honey to it, as well as a little smokiness… It was so adequate, it almost made her laugh.

Rowan must have noticed the half-smile because he looked at her with one brow lifted.

“Good?” he asked.

“Way better,” she admitted.

“It’s one of my favorites, it’s a spiced whiskey with a hint of honey. It’s aged in barrels that give it a woody and smokey flavor.”

It was lighting a fire inside of her. The smokiness swirled inside her body the same way she felt herself burn every time she fought, every time her firsts found their target. It was fire, it was smoke, it was ash, it was her. She was Fireheart, and she had the strength needed to tell this story. She was Celaena, and she could open up to others. But she was also Aelin, and even if she wasn’t going to say that out loud, it was her story that she was about to tell.

“Once upon a time,” she said finally, “in a land she has since forgotten, lived a young girl that loved her family very much. But when her family decided to move over to a new land, something… something happened, and the girl’s parents both died before reaching their destination. The girl was left alone, half-dead, but was found by a man.”

She paused, taking in a shaky breath.

“The guy that took her in gave her a roof and told her to forget about who she used to be. Her past was to stay buried, together with her parents, and she was to start a new life. One where rules were dictated, and where she was meant to do as she was told. This girl was taught how to fight, between other fouler activities I rather not mention right now. She had to earn a living and pay for everything she was using, the housing, her food, her clothes, everything came at a price. And that price… It was silence, it was having so many things held against her that no matter what happened, she was owned.”

No matter how many times she’d tried to get away, Arobynn had too much against her. He had proof of every single break in she had been involved in, and if she ever crossed him, she knew she’d paid for it. And then there was Sam… He would make Sam pay for it too. He had always enjoyed imparting punishments on the other party, he made them watch… Sam had been there when her scars had been carved onto her skin. He’d watched it all unfold... Forced to remain helpless, observant.

“Why would the man do that? Keep a child that wasn’t his own, force you- her, to do all those things?” Rowan was sitting on the edge of the seat and his tone was calmer than normal, probably a side effect of the third glass of whiskey in his hand.

“Money. Everything he did, was for money. He thought at some point he’d be able to get a ransom for the girl. Maybe he still thinks that way.”

Rowan thought about her words, trying to take it all in.

“And how does that tie you with Maeve, with the fights?” 

“I’ve been fighting since I was 12,” she said slowly, making him flinch as he looked at her with renowned ferocity. 

“He made you fight when you were only 12?!” he almost yelled.

“How did you think I got this good by 17?” she scoffed. “I’ve been training since I was 9, and started with illegal fighting by 12. I’ve always been good, he said I was a natural. I was… I wasn’t meant to be a part of this tournament, but the fighter he’d selected had an accident shortly before the first round of fights and I was the perfect replacement. He has a lot of money on me.”

Rowan shook his head lightly, as if not being able to believe what he was hearing.

“So you have nothing to do with Maeve’s drug empire?”

“I didn’t even know that existed until you mentioned it tonight,” she admitted.

“You’re telling the truth,” he stated as he looked at her, really looked at her.

“I don’t lie… I might omit information, but I don’t lie.”

“What are you not telling me, then?” he had a small playful smirk curving his lips up.

He definitely needed to smile more often.

“A lot of things, but so are you,” she fired back.

“Touche,” he raised his glass as if in a toast and drank another sip. She followed suit. “Is that… Is that how you got those scars? From the events in which your parents died?”

The ‘accident’… no, that wasn’t it. Glass. Broken glass and endless nights of locked doors... and honey. And pain. 

“Sorry, it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it, it might be hard to remember. I shouldn’t have asked,” Rowan added quickly while taking in her reaction.

Celaena was shaking slightly, her head moving from side to side as if trying to shake the memories out of her head. “No…” she managed to say. She swallowed hard, took a sip of whiskey and tried again. “No, that’s not it. Sorry, it’s hard to… No one has seen those scars before, and I… you… ” She shook her head again, the drink between her hands shaking lightly.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Rowan jumped to his feet and went to kneel in front of her, his hands closing over her own as he held the glass for her. The liquid evened out as her hands stopped shaking and the warmth from Rowan’s palms calmed more than just the swirling drink. “You don’t need to talk about it, I shouldn’t have asked, but… Just know that you can talk with me if you want, or whenever you want, okay?”

Celaena’s eyes were fixed on the glass in front of her, but Rowan was right there, his eyes leveled with her and she couldn’t stop it, she had to look up. She wanted to say thank you, but the words got stuck as her eyes met his. She’d never seen anything so green and peaceful. It was like admiring a tiny forest hidden within his irises, and the way he was looking at her as if he could see her _. Really see her. _ When was the last time she had felt seen? Not for who she tried people to think she was, but for who she really was underneath every disguise? No one knew the darker parts of her, the parts that haunted her at night when she couldn’t sleep.

Lost within his eyes, she burned from within. Rowan had seen her scars, and he hadn’t flinched, hadn't ran away, he’d asked her about what had happened. He had taken her to his place and told her his deepest truths, gave her a safe space to do the same. And maybe it was the alcohol thinking for her, but she wanted to stay in that safe bubble, if only for a little longer.

“Thank you,” she managed to say after the longest time.

“It’s okay,” Rowan said, letting go of her hands and leaning back to sit on the low table, same as Fenrys had sat there what felt like hours ago.

“What’s the time?” She asked then, distracted by that thought.

Rowan looked up behind her head to the clock on the wall, and then looked back to her with a half-smile. 

“Late… damn, it’s past midnight already. Let me show you to the bathroom so you can have a shower and then we can ride back to my bike and you can return to the hotel. I’ll find you something to wear.”

Celaena looked down at herself, to her torn leggings and muddied jacket, and nodded. She didn’t want to leave, but Rowan was right, it was late. She should shower and go back to the Hotel. She really should. Then why wasn’t she standing up?

“Are you okay?” 

Rowan’s voice snapped her out of her stupidity, and she finally rose from the couch.

“Yes, I’m fine. I know where the shower is, I’ll make my way there,” she replied.

Rowan found her a black top and a pair of grey sweatpants with an elastic waistband and left them by the door while she jumped into the shower. The hot water helped her ease her sore muscles, and by the time she walked back into the lounge fifteen minutes later, wearing clothes that smelled like men’s deodorant, she found Rowan on one of the armchairs. He was asleep.

His head was tilted back, his mouth slightly opened, and his glass of whiskey was on the table, empty. There was no way he should be driving her anywhere after the three -or maybe four- drinks he’d had, so Celaena made her way to the couch and curled into a little ball with her head over the armrest. 

She would snooze for a while and Rowan could drive her when they both woke up in a few hours.

***

It had been a long time since Aelin had been haunted by nightmares of the accident, but every once in a while, when she thought about it during the day, the memories came back. It was way more often than not that she dreamed about that  _ other _ night; the one that had left her scarred and broken. 

Tonight was a mixed of both. And the nightmares had no mercy.

She was back at Arobynn’s office, the sound of glass breaking, shattering her from the inside out. There were pieces of glass all over her legs, blood dripping from the cuts, the scarlet liquid sipping all over the carpet. It was pooling on the floor while Sam screamed something next to her. The whole room seemed to be drenched in it; the crimson liquid was dripping from the walls and Arobynn was standing in the middle, laughing. Her chest felt heavy, and suddenly, she couldn’t breathe. She was back inside the plane’s cabin and water was filling up her lungs. She was dying.

“Celaena!”

Arms were gripping her tight and she was shaking, not being able to get any air inside her lungs. She was full of water. The water was tinted red. She was drowning in her own blood.

“Celaena, please, open your eyes, it’s just a dream. Celaena, look at me, look at me!”

The urgency of the words got her to open her eyes and she found herself inside a dim-lit room, a face inches from her, arms gripping her shoulders. She was out of the nightmare, but the water was still inside her lungs, she couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t. She was dying.

“Celaena, look at me,” Rowan repeated, but she already was. She was looking at him, but that wasn’t allowing her to breath any easier. “Listen to my voice. You’re having a panic attack, you’re gonna be okay. I need you to exhale now, good, good, just like that, now in again, breath with me,” Rowan breathed in, and then out, and Celaena did her best to breathe along with him.

She got a little bit of air in and tried to remind herself there was no water inside her lungs. She was in Rowan’s apartment, not in the plane, not at Arobynn’s place. Rowan’s. Safe.

“Good, that’s better,” Rowan said softly. “Feel the leather of this horrible couch underneath you, feel its roughness and let it remind you of where you are. And keep breathing. Allow your heart to slow down, you are okay. You are safe. I saved your life earlier tonight, and I’m willing to do it again over and over if needed. You’re breathing, you’re fine. It was only a nightmare,” the words rolled out of his mouth in a soothing tone, and the whole time, he tried to breathe with her, to give her a rhythm to follow. 

He let his hands drift down from her shoulders and touched the length of her arms until his hands were holding onto hers. He was kneeling on the floor next to the couch and she was still curled up in fetal position, the same way she’d fallen asleep. He looked at her as if trying to make sure she wasn’t going to freak out again. Her breathing was almost back to normal, and she realized that her cheeks were wet.

“Sorry,” she said in a strangled voice.

Rowan looked at their linked hands, and slowly let her go. “Are you okay now? Can you breathe?”

Celaena nodded and pushed herself up to a sitting position. She hugged her knees to her chest and nodded again. She felt like one of those toys that bob their heads all the time. “I’m fine,” she said, because she needed to hear it. “I’m fine… I’m sorry.”

Rowan arched a brow. “There is absolutely nothing to be sorry about. We all have nightmares, and most of us have panic attacks too, even if we don’t talk about it. It’s more common than you think…. Has this happened to you before?”

Celaena shook her head no. She’d felt her chest tightened before, but she’d never lost herself as badly as just then. She missed the warmth of Rowan’s hands in hers, in her shoulders, and she wanted to ask him to sit next to her. The need for someone to be close, to understand her, was breaking her all over again. Coldness and loneliness surrounded her. She didn’t want to die. She wasn’t ready to die. 

“Okay, let me get you a glass of water, I’ll be right back.”

As Rowan stood up, Celaena snapped her hand up and grabbed his wrist. 

“Don’t,” she said quickly.

“I’m only going to the kitchen-” he cut himself as he looked at her, and Celaena imagined the panicked look he could see on her face. “Okay, okay,” Rowan said. “I’ll stay right here,” and to her surprise, he sat next to her on the couch.

Celaena slowly released the grip on his wrist and closed her eyes for a second. As the visions clouded her mind once more, she snapped them open.

“He locked me,” she said in a strangled voice.

Rowan turned his body to be facing her and waited for her to keep going, the same way she’d waited for him. It was her time to let it all out, and she knew Rowan wasn’t going to judge her, or interrupt her.

“Those scars you saw on my back… It was him, the man who found me. Well, not him exactly. He never does his own dirty work. I was trying to run away. I’d been stealing from him for years, and I almost had enough money to try to run away and to get a private investigator to find some dirt on him. I wanted to flee, and I wanted him to go down. But he found my stash. When I returned home that night, he called me to his office.”

She stopped for a minute, picturing what the office had looked like. No blood dripping down the walls, only Arobynn sitting behind his desk and Sam on one of the chairs across from him. Two guards had been posted at the door. He had asked her to take a seat next to Sam, but she’d been too scared to be so vulnerable, so she had stayed standing where she was.

“Things went sour faster than I thought they would and I ended up wrestling with some of his security guards. I don’t know how far he was going to take it, but…. It didn’t matter, they restrained me, and I freaked out, kicking around the place. I freed myself and took a swing at one of the guards, he dodged, and I kicked him, and… He grabbed my leg and pushed me against a bookcase…” she swallowed hard at the bile rising to her mouth. “It was an old piece of furniture, framed in wood with glass shelves… The glass shattered against the weight of my body-” she had to stop. She needed to remind herself to breathe.

There had been so much blood. The pain of the glass digging into her skin had made her vision blur. She had seen shiny spots of light in front of her eyes and the whole room had turned dark after that. She had passed out and woken up what felt like hours later, still on the floor of the office, glasses piercing into her skin. She had tried to move and found that the pain was ripping her apart. Torn to ribbons. Left alone to heal.

“Wood, glass…” she said. “There were shards of glass in my back, some on my legs. The top half of my body landed on the carpet, so there were only a few scratches, nothing that scarred too badly. But the bottom half of my body… There was a huge splinter of wood stuck to the side of my hip, my legs were scratched and there was… Blood… So much blood everywhere.”

“I’m so sorry,” Rowan said next to her, and she dared look at him. 

“Don’t pity me,” she said, repeating his words from earlier on.

“I don’t pity you. But I’m incredibly sorry that you had to go through something like that.”

“That wasn’t even the worst of it,” she muttered. 

Rowan looked at her shocked, and Celaena let out the most painful truth. Allowing herself to be vulnerable if only for a minute.

“He locked me in my room, had the guards take me over there without even calling for a doctor. It was hours or maybe even days before a doctor was allowed inside the room, and only to ensure I wasn’t going to die from the injuries. I needed blood transfusions, so my skin was pierced yet again against my will. The shards of glass were still inside of me when the doctor left, and for days, I could only lie on my stomach. I drifted in and out of sleep for days and heard the click of the key on the door whenever someone came in or out.

“Not like I could have run away. I couldn’t even stand. Someone came to check on me daily, change the sheets and clean up the... well, there was no way I could stand up to go to the bathroom,” she admitted through gritted teeth. She felt Rowan tensing by her side and looked down at his tight fists. Hot tears were burning in her eyes at the humiliating memories. “I could feel my skin healing around the glass, and whenever I moved, the skin would tear open,” her mouth felt full of sand as she spoke, her throat dry and her cheeks wet again with the free falling tears. “By the time a doctor was allowed to take the shards out, the wounds had to be reopened. The healing took so long… That’s why the scars are so… Horrible.”

Sam had been there almost the whole time. He had snuck in as often as possible, but Celaena had ignored him, too angry at him for thinking he had ratted her out. He had brought her honey to help her wounds heal faster once the pieces of glass were out, but by then, her skin was already a mess.

“Give me a name,” Rowan said between gritted teeth.

“What?” 

“What’s the man’s name? Give me a name,” he repeated.

She looked at him, really looked, and could see the murderous expression in his eyes. She had seen that look in the streets plenty of times, and at the fights. It was the kind of look Cain had given her before knocking her head against the wall in the alley.

“What would you do? Kill him? Not even that would be good enough. I want him to slowly rot in jail for as long as possible. Death would be a mercy…” she wiped the tears off her cheeks with the back of her hands. “I want Arobynn Hamel to suffer.”

She saw the recognition in his eyes as soon as she spat the name.

“He’s the one that was with Maeve at the gala, isn’t he?”

She nodded, unable to say another word. She had said too much, way too much.

“Then please let me help you,” Rowan said, surprising her. “Help me take Maeve down, and I’ll help you take Arobynn down with her,” he said it with such intensity, and he mindlessly lifted a hand, running his thumb under her right eye and catching the last of her tears.

She froze for a second, her pulse going wild. She didn’t need to know him to realize he was telling the truth. But she did know him. And that was why she knew without doubt that Rowan was going to do whatever he could to take both Arobynn and Maeve down. To see them pay for what they’ve done.

“How far would you go to see them pay?” she asked, rejoicing in their shared anger. 

“To whatever end,” he answered without any hesitation.


	33. Ménage à trois

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bringing you a bit of a different chapter today, and I have a feeling you might either love me or hate me for it! This is a multiple POVs chapter, it's pretty obvious whose is which, but thought I'd let you know. I really hope you enjoy this little bit of fluff after the hard few chapters I just put you all through! Haha

The weeks following the Halloween party were not particularly quiet in the Ashryver household. Aedion had gotten over his fight with Lysandra, but there was still something bugging him deep down, and he couldn’t shake it. Lysandra had never been the jealous type and that had been one of the biggest reasons he always felt so comfortable around her. 

Aedion considered himself to be a free spirit in so many ways. He wasn’t the most expressive in matters of love, but he did certainly have a lot of love to give. And not only to Lysandra. He had a deep understanding with a lot of the guys from his team and he considered them to be part of the family. He would’ve given an arm for any of them without thinking about it twice. Aedion cared about the people around him, and he did so deeply. He felt everything so strongly, so purely, that sometimes he thought there was something wrong with him. Sometimes the emotions took over, and they did not always end up being expressed the right way, or the way he intended. 

Aedion felt a lot, but he didn’t know how to deal with it.

And maybe that was the thing about him, he was willing to give everything for those he cared about. And he cared about Lysandra, a lot. So he had given her everything, even when he didn’t think he was ready for it. 

“Aedion, dinner is ready!” his father yelled from the main floor.

“Coming!” he yelled back.

He put the controller down and turned off the video game console, heading down the stairs within a matter of minutes. Dinners at their house were normally the only quiet time. Gavriel Ashryver might have had a lot of defects, but when his wife had passed away, he had promised Aedion that he would always have time for him, even if just for a few hours a day. So dinner had turned into a sacred time for them.

During the day, the house filled up with business meetings, partners of the company coming and going, people going around the house, maids cleaning up, chauffeurs coming in and out of the lounge through the front door. But at night time, the house quieted down and Aedion got to spend time with his father: and sometimes also with Lys, whenever she’d go over for dinner.

“Is Lys not coming?” Gavriel asked as if reading Aedion’s mind.

“No, she’s not, she wanted to spend some time with her parents before they left on a business trip,” he replied.

“Are you two alright? Did you fight again?”

“Not really,” Aedion replied, thinking it over. They hadn’t fought after the Halloween party, but something had remained strained between them.

Lysandra had complained about him spending too much time with Ress lately, and he had been so annoyed at the jealousy display. He was free to spend time with whomever he wanted, and if Lysandra couldn’t understand that, maybe they were not meant for each other after all. He loved her, he really did, but sometimes he struggled to imagine a future by her side. The Ashryver heir wasn’t sure they wanted the same things out of life. Lysandra was planning on opening a beauty business, she wanted the world to know her, her name to be in newspapers and magazines. And Aedion just wanted to move out of town where no one knew the Ashryver last name, somewhere where people didn’t look at him like he was the boy that had lost most of his family at such a young age.

Maybe it was time they discussed the future. Maybe.

***

Ress Brulleman was a man of simple pleasures, simple words, and a simple life. He knew what he wanted and when he wanted it. He lived his life day by day, taking things as they came and making the most out of what he had at any given time. 

As he walked into school on a Tuesday half-way through November, he suddenly felt like getting out of there. He’d been spending more and more time with the new junior and when he saw him walking down the hall towards him, the idea just popped into his mind.

“Cortland!” he said as the boy reached him. He patted his back in a quick hug, and Sam smiled shyly at him.

“Ress, where are you heading?” he asked, seeming a little nervous.

“Well, I was meant to be heading towards the labs for a chemistry class, but that sounds so boring right now…”

“What do you suggest?” Sam’s smile was a small playful thing, and it drove him crazy. 

Sam drove him crazy. 

The new kid had come out of his shell since the Halloween party, and at least when it was just the two of them, he was like a new human. And Ress loved the guy he had gotten to know in the attic over the gym and the dim-lit corridors around school. 

_ Fuck _ , maybe he did love him.

“I say… my car is in the parking lot, right next to the emergency exit, and I know a quiet place with a great view that I would love for you to see.”

Sam looked around the hallway, a nervous glint in his eyes. “Skipping class?” he whispered.

“Are you up for it, Cortland?” Ress smiled with only half of his mouth, and he knew there’d be a dimple in his right cheek as he did. He noticed Sam looking at it... he had kissed that spot many times during the past two weeks.

“Don’t dare me, Brulleman,” he snapped back after a too-long second.

***

Sam Cortland had been living in a cloud. 

His mind had been a complete mess and he had no idea what he was up to. He knew there were a lot of important things he needed to deal with, but at the same time, he was… well, he was on a beautiful hill with Ress, and the boy’s hands were playing with his hair as he sat between his legs. Sam’s back felt warm from being flushed against Ress’ chest as the quarterback sat against a tree trunk. They were watching the city down below, and the day was sunny and beautiful. And Sam didn’t think he had ever thought about the weather being beautiful before.

Convenient, yes. Cloudy and shady enough to hide while sneaking into a house, yes. Too sunny to be inconspicuous while wearing a black hoodie, yes. But beautiful? He had never thought about that before. But right then, the sun was tickling his skin, making his eyes squint just a little, and the warmth of Ress’ body against him was like a second sun, his own sun… And it was beautiful.

Sam was in a cloud. Floating above the city. And deep down, he was scared he was going to fall.

***

That afternoon, Sam entered the Mansion and found it empty. Again. The Mansion used to be a place buzzing with people and movement when he was younger, but year after year, it had gotten quieter. And since Celaena had moved out, the place had felt like a ghost house. 

Not only Celaena was gone, but since she had moved to the hotel -not coming back nearly as often as she had said she would- Arobynn had started to disappear as well. He wasn’t spending much time in the house anymore, always traveling around, in business meetings as he called them. He’d be gone for days at a time, and he hadn’t asked Sam about Aelin’s life at school for so long that he didn’t know what to think about his mission anymore.

Maybe that was why Sam had taken the liberty to do what he wanted with his life, even if for a bit.  _ He deserved to live, didn’t he? _

As he entered his room and dropped his bag on the bed, his phone rang.

“Hey gorgeous,” he said, picking up after looking at the name on the screen.

“Sam Cortland, my beautiful friend, how are you doing?” Lysandra asked on the other side of the line, her tone sweet and mocking at the same time.

“I’m fine, and you?”

“Good, good, can’t complain much. But you… are you sure you’re fine? I didn’t see you in math today.”

Lys sounded genuinely concerned, and Sam felt guilty for a second.

“Oh, that… I’m…. sorry, I skipped class,” he admitted.

“You? Skipping class? With whom? Oh my God, Sam Cortland, do tell! What did I miss?” Lys’ voice was an octave too high, and he thought he heard her clapping.

“Well, maybe… there’s a chance I went to the hills for some sightseeing.”

“Whom with?” Lysandra asked again.

Sam breathed in and held the air for a moment. He shouldn’t lie to Lysandra, after all, she was his best friend. She had been amazing and supportive of him, and he was sure she wouldn’t judge him. And maybe... Maybe if she thought he was with Ress, she wouldn’t be jealous of the way he had been looking at Aedion all the previous months. There was a huge chance she’d be completely fine with it, so why was it so hard to say it out loud?

“Sam? Are you still there?”

“Yes… sorry, I… I went there with Ress,” he let the truth out and closed his eyes, ready for the blow. For his heart to shatter.

“Oh. My. God. Are you shitting me? Sam filthy Cortland, you are coming to my place right now! I’ll get popcorn, and find a few good cheesy movies, and you’ll tell me everything about it! Are you in?”

“What about your parents?”

“Out of town, they left last night, please come? I don’t want to be alone and Aedion had dinner with the team tonight.”

“Okay,” he accepted with a small laugh. “I’ll be over there in less than an hour.”

He was actually excited to think he could talk about everything that had been going on with Ress. He wouldn’t go into much detail, he wanted to save that for himself, but maybe… Maybe it’d be good to talk with a friend and try to figure out what was going on inside his head; and his heart.

***

As Aedion walked out from the restaurant after dinner with the team, he froze on the spot. A girl was walking in, her long blond hair dancing in the wind, her smile turned up higher on one side, as if stuck on a perpetual smirk. His heart squeezed on his chest like every time he saw her, but then she turned to look at him, nodding in greeting as her lips turned almost downward. 

And her eyes were all wrong.

They were a deep dark brown, almost like dark chocolate. And she was holding Dorian’s arm in hers.

“Hello, Aedion,” Dorian greeted politely as they both walked into the restaurant behind him.

Every time he ran into her, Aedion got this familiar feeling, like he knew Celaena from another life, from another place. But the girl didn’t seem to pay him much attention at all, and he could never place the feeling. He knew who she reminded him of, and he’d like to think Aelin would’ve grown to look something like her. Confident, happy, sure of herself, and always walking with her chin held high. 

He needed to stop thinking about his cousin, it had been long enough, and he needed to move on. There was no bringing her back.

Aedion shook his head and followed the team towards the park, they were going to play some mini-golf and drink a few beers before calling it a night. 

***

Ress couldn’t stop checking his phone every five minutes. He was losing badly at mini-golf, but he couldn’t care less. To be honest, he had never been too competitive. The games with the team were different because there, he was a part of something. It wasn’t as much about winning as it was about making his team proud. But mini-golf? He couldn’t give a rat’s ass about it. 

“Ress, you’re playing the worst game ever, where’s your mind at?” Aedion joked as he punched him in the shoulder and then tapped a finger to his forehead.

“You know this game is not my thing,” he replied with a shrug.

“Yeah, I know, because you’ve always sucked at it, but you’re more distracted than usual,” the team captain retorted.

“Yeah, well, we’re not all as lucky as you are to have a beautiful partner by our side... some of us still have to play the game, and well, I might be stupidly falling for someone and waiting to see if he’ll text me tonight,” he replied with another theatrical shrug.

His relationship with Aedion had always been amazing. They had split up after a few months together because they both wanted to explore new things, to see what life had to offer. They’d been too young, they’d wanted more. But through it all, they had remained good friends. 

Ress had to admit, Aedion was a really good looking guy, and he couldn’t lie, he still thought about him sometimes… Stared at his perfectly flat stomach while they changed, got lost in his enthralling turquoise eyes every once in a while… But Ress loved Lysandra too, and he would ever get in the middle of a relationship. He was fine with being just friends, the rest -he told himself- was his hormones driving him nuts. 

“Oh, wow,” Aedion lit up a bit. “I didn’t know you were dating anyone,” he said with a huge smile, clasping Ress’ shoulder in a side hug.

“Well, I’m not even sure if I can call it dating… I mean, he’s not out yet, and I don’t want to push him to do anything he’s not ready for. But we spent the afternoon together and I was hoping he’d text me after that, and so far… nothing.”

They walked over to the next hole and Aedion left for a moment while playing his shot. He got the ball in the hole in three quick moves and then returned to Ress’ side as if the conversation had never stopped.

“Do I know him?” the captain asked with a smirk.

“Not telling you. I’m not going to push it, he can keep the way he feels about himself a secret for as long as he wants to. He knows he’s got my full support, but I think… I think it might be complicated in his house. He never talks about his home life and I get the feeling they wouldn’t be okay with any of it.”

“That must suck, we’re damn lucky to have parents as supportive as we do. I think my dad knew I liked boys even before I did,” Aedion joked.

“Yeah, it’s still somehow easier for you... you keep taking Lysandra home and who’s dad wouldn’t be happy with that?” he laughed, and Aedion laughed with him.

“Touche.”

Ress moved over to play his shot and it took him 10 tries to finally get the ball inside the damned hole. He was scoring last.

Returning to the sidelines, he checked his phone again. 

There was a text from Sam asking what he was up to. He smiled brightly as he typed back that he was kicking ass at mini-golf.

***

“Sam Cortland, stop playing on your phone!”

“Sorry,” Sam blushed as he looked up at Lysandra. He knew she was looking at his cheeks.

“You’re blushing,” she said after a second. “You really do like him, don’t ya?”

“Well… I don’t know. I’ve never really been with anybody before... I mean, I’d liked guys before, but never had a chance for anything to happen. But I have to admit, I like the way it feels to spend time with him. I like the way he looks at me and how he listens whenever I speak. I like that I feel more like myself, like I’m not being judged when I’m around him, like I can just be... me.”

“Sam…” Lys looked hurt as her words drifted off.

“Oh, no, that’s not what I meant!”

“Don’t you feel comfortable when you’re with me?” she asked sadly.

They’d been watching silly romcoms on TV while eating a huge bowl of popcorn and Sam put the bowl down on the floor and leaned across the couch to rest his head on Lysandra’s lap as she pouted at him. 

“That’s not it,” he said.

Lys threaded her fingers through Sam’s hair and he closed his eyes. “I forgive you because I think you’re hopelessly in love,” she said sweetly.

“Lys… I don’t know… and… you’re right in some ways. I’ve been lying to you,” as the words slipped from his mouth, he sat back up, looking at Lys’ emerald green eyes. “I’m not the person you think I am. I don’t want to lie to you, trust me, you’re the best friend I’ve ever had, but there’s a lot of things about me you don’t know, secrets that are not mine to tell, and I think…” Sam thought about every lie he’d had to tell since being at Adarlan Elite High, every secret he was holding and how it was all eating him up from the inside. “I think it might be better for us to keep some distance from now on.”

He hadn’t planned on saying it, but he’d been thinking about it for so long. He hated lying to Lysandra and there was no way he could tell her what was really going on. It’d mean putting her in danger, and he was not willing to do that.

“Sam, what the hell are you talking about? You are my best friend, and I don’t care how many secrets you might be harboring.” Lys cupped his cheeks sweetly and smiled. “I know you. I know your heart’s as pure as they come, and I know whatever secret you might be hiding, it’s because you think- no, you know that it’s the best thing for everybody. You are my best friend, and you’re not getting out of it this easily.” 

Lysandra was still cupping Sam’s cheeks and she tilted his head down to plant a quick kiss on his forehead before letting go.

Sam’s sight clouded as unshed tears pooled in his eyes.

“What did I do to deserve you?” he asked, looping his arms around his best friend’s shoulders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you love me or hate me now? Haha I'd love to hear your thoughts about these 3 boys and their complicated relationships!   
> And don't worry, Celaena will be back in full force on the next chapter! :O Something BIG is about to happen!!


	34. Dinning with a surprise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Anxiety and panic.

Even two weeks after her conversation with Rowan, Celaena still didn’t have much more information on her aunt and Arobynn. She didn’t have anything that would make a real difference, she still needed tangible proof. She’d talked with Manon and her sisters a bunch of times, and they were trying to find evidence of the dirt under both of their nails, but they hadn’t found enough to go to court with. 

There had to be more people involved than they originally thought, as Maeve Galathinius and Arobynn Hamel didn’t seem to have a single paper involving them with neither the fights nor the drugs under their names. Except for that one bet Celaena had found at the start, the one with Sam’s name on it. She’d gone back to The Mansion looking for it, but she hadn’t found anything before she’d heard the front door and had to flee not to run into her mentor. She knew from the start that it wasn’t going to be easy, she never expected her aunt to be stupid enough to be doing all her illegal business under her own name, but they were struggling more than she’d expected. 

They were now considering the fact that they could have aliases and that was what the Blackbeak triplets were working on. They needed to find those names being used for the shady transactions so they could make a connection between them. Between Maeve and the fights, between her and Arobynn, and between both of them and the drugs. 

That’s what Celaena was thinking about as she walked down the road holding Dorian’s arm. Dorian had invited her to dinner, and after he’d begged a little, she’d agreed. His father had a meeting at a restaurant and he’d insisted his son joined him. So logically, Dorian had wanted to piss his father off by taking Celaena with him and even went as far as asking her to dress casually, even though the restaurant sounded fancy enough to be worthy of a dress.

She’d decided to wear her comfortable riding leggings, a short-sleeved dark grey top from a punk band she’d seen live once, and a jean jacket with a grey hood. She was only wearing mascara and dark red lipstick, no doubt, the opposite of anything Dorian Sr. could envision for his son.

As they approached the place, they almost ran into Aedion Ashryver who was coming out of the venue next door with a few of the guys from the football team. Celaena barely nodded and then kept walking as Dorian greeted him with a few polite words. It was still hard for her to look at him, as every time she did, she was assaulted by memories of her past that she wasn’t ready to deal with. The events of the last few weeks had made things harder for her -if that was even possible.

“He always looks at you weird, I don’t like it,” Dorian muttered as they walked through the front door.

“What are you talking about?” Celaena wondered, looking back over her shoulder at her cousin.

“I’m not sure, but he always looks at you different, like... he’s always staring at you as if you’re something he wants... I don’t know how to explain it,” Dorian replied with a frown.

Celaena bit the inside of her cheek and then tried to convince herself not to worry about any of it. Dorian was probably just being overly protective. Despite the fact that they weren’t really dating, he’d become a pretty good friend in the last month. They had had a few dates around town, and even if they never went any further than holding hands, she always had fun. She didn’t feel that way for Dorian, she wasn’t interested in kissing him, or being close to him. His body wasn’t warm and inviting like— She shook her head as they reached the table where Dorian’s father was waiting.

Looking at the table, her jaw almost dropped and she thanked all her years of faking emotions as she managed to keep a straight face.

“Son,” Dorian Sr. said in a clipped tone, “Celaena,” he added with a bit of restraint. “I’m glad you could  _ both _ join us. Please take a seat, and let me introduce you to my dear friend Marion Lochan, and her daughter, Elide. I’m pretty sure you must know each other from school.”

“Yes, we do,” Elide said as she nodded in their direction. “Celaena, Dorian, it’s good to see you.”

They had all stood up to greet each other, and as they sat back down, Celaena made a huge effort not to look at Marion. It had been a very long time since she’d seen her mother’s best friend, but the memories didn’t care about that and they still came in full force, clouding her brain and reminding her of everything she didn’t have anymore; everything she’d lost and everything she wished she could have again. 

She made herself take a seat and grabbed the napkin from the table, unfolding it and setting it over her knees. First Aedion, now Marion and Elide, this night was certainly trying to rip her to shreds.

“What a pleasant surprise having you bring a companion, I wasn’t sure if you were going to,” Dorian Sr. said in that same clipped tone as he looked at his son.

“We were already together when you invited me so I thought it’d be right to bring her along,” her friend lied with ease. 

As the conversation went on, Celaena grabbed the menu and opened it in front of her nose, pretending to be interested in the food while the voices around her turned into background noise and her mind drifted.

Seeing Aedion outside only minutes ago had felt like a bucket of cold water being thrown at her unexpectedly. It always felt like that whenever she ran into him. It was all so complicated, the years of uninterrupted lies were catching up on her and now that she was convinced that her cousin had nothing to do with what had happened to her parents, she wanted to be able to tell him the truth. She wanted to be able to trust him, to talk to him. Hadn’t he been her best friend? But wouldn’t that put him in danger? And how could she know that he would still have her back after so many years? 

Anger was always the easier emotion for her, so she’d tried so hard to be angry at him every time they ran into each other. She’d tried to convince herself that Aedion had abandoned her. That he’d hate her if he ever found out the truth. She couldn’t care about him…  _ The people you love are only weapons that will be used against you _ , she reminded herself. 

“What will the lady have?” the waiter asked, pulling her out of her mind for a second.

“The crab ceviche with orange and arugula salad, and a sparkling water,” Celaena answered, reading the first thing in front of her without thinking. 

The waiter took the orders from everyone else and as he took away the menu, Celaena found her hands feeling empty. She played with the napkin on her lap as she tried to focus on Dorian Sr, not ready to look at Marion just yet. Elide’s eyes were digging into her from across the table, so she looked down, taking a sip from the water the waiter had just brought over.

“Celaena, have you thought about my offer to join the book club?” Elide asked after a moment, forcing Celaena to glance up.

“I don’t have time at the moment with cheerleading and all,” she replied a little too fast.

“Oh, I can imagine…” Elide bit her lip. “I know the competition starts after the break, you’re probably really busy practicing all your stunts…” Elide was playing with the edge of the tablecloth, her voice seeming nervous. “I’ve noticed a few bruises the other week... you’re training hard.”

Elide smiled shyly and something in Celaena’s gut twisted. She had a creepy feeling climbing up her spine, and her intuition was rarely wrong.

“Lysandra’s been pushing us incredibly hard,” she said with her biggest smile. “We’ve been trying a lot of complicated moves that I’ve never done before, so yes, I’d fallen more than usual,” she finished with a faked laugh.  _ It was nothing. It was surely nothing. _

Her fingers were going crazy, folding pieces of the napkin one way and the other in an order they hadn’t followed in a long time. 

Since she was a kid, Celaena had always been restless. Her mother used to say Aelin had so much energy, sometimes she didn’t know what to do with it. That was why she’d taught her how to do origami. It was a way of keeping most of Aelin’s body quiet while her fingers could do all the work, releasing all the trapped energy within her. It had been a while since Celaena had had to resort to it as, while in the Mansion, she normally punched the boxing bag instead. Her new lifestyle had provided her with an easy way out for all her nervous energy to be released, but sitting at that table, she didn’t know any better.

Elide’s eyes were still on her as she talked again, “I can imagine, I’ll make sure to go to the tournament this year.”

“You never go to those events,” Marion said, addressing her daughter.

“Things change, mum,” she replied, glancing at Celaena again. 

As Dorian jumped into the conversation and she felt free to stop talking, her eyes dropped to her lap. The red napkin was folded in the shape of a swan, her mother’s favorite. It had taken little Aelin months to learn that one, but once she had, it had turned into her favorite too. She’d made the shape over and over again, decorating her room with colorful paper birds all over the place. She’d made so many, that she had started giving them away to friends and family for their birthdays.

The vivid image of Evalin’s features clouded Celaena’s vision, and she cleared her throat, trying to get rid of the knot that was trying to strangle her.

“Excuse me,” she said, getting up from her chair and placing the napkin on top of the table. “I need to use the restroom,” she grabbed her purse and left the table while she heard a few answers that she couldn’t understand.

She needed out of there, but she couldn’t run in the middle of the restaurant.  _ Could she?  _ Remembering everything Arobynn had taught her about being invisible, Celaena walked slowly, placing one foot in front of the other with deliberate but casual elegance while her heart pounded inside her chest like a war drum. She kept her chin high, eyes locked on the sign that pointed to the ladies’ room. As soon as the door closed behind her, she dropped her shoulders and scanned the room fast, making sure she was alone. Both of the cubicles were empty, so Celaena entered the one farthest from the entrance.

“I’m an idiot,” she mumbled as she dropped the lid and sat on top of it, resting her elbows on her knees and her head on her hands. 

She had tried so hard to be unaffected by all the people from her old life trickling back into her present. Seeing Aedion had been hard enough from day one, but Elide and Marion were a whole other deal. While Aedion was a link to her own past, Marion was a constant reminder of her mother, and those memories always brought the water back; water that tried to drown her and made it almost impossible to breathe.

“I’m a warrior, I’m a fighter, I’m strong, I’m a burning fire,” she whispered, the words barely making it out of her lips through the water she felt filling up her lungs. 

_ It’s all in my head, _ she tried to tell herself.  _ I’m on the ground, I’m okay. _

Still, memories of her mother sitting by her bed clouded her vision as the first tears rolled down her cheeks.

_ “You’ve gotten so good at this, Aelin, your swans are even better than mine now,” Evalin had said with a gentle smile on her face. “Do they help?” _

_ “Yes mummy, they are fun to make and I don’t feel like running around the room when I make them.” _

Her mother’s face paled, her eyes filling up with panic as the room turned into a plane. Celaena squeezed her eyes shut, her hands fisting around her hair while she tried not to scream. 

A door opened in the distance and she quieted her sobs, biting the inside of her cheek as a set of feet walked into the cubicle next to hers. After a minute, the door opened again, then she heard the sound of a tap opening and closing, and finally, the outside door. She released her breath loudly, refilling her lungs with effort. She needed to regain her composure and go back outside, but a part of her just wanted to stay in there forever, curl into a ball and let all the memories take the best of her. She needed to scream and let it all out.  _ Anger is so much easier to deal with than sadness _ , she thought with a humorless chuckle. Closing her hand into a fist, she punched the inside of her thigh once, hard.

It felt better.

She punched at it again, harder, knowing that it’d probably leave a bruise, but the pain helped clear her head. She stood up, brushing invisible dust off her leggings and wiping the wetness under her eyes as she opened the door. The reflection in the mirror told her she needed to pull her shit together. Her hair was a mess, her eyes were puffy and the mascara had rubbed all over her eyelids.

“Damn,” she placed her purse over the counter and opened it up, taking her mascara out with one hand as she tried to fix her hair with the other.

Celaena closed one eye and wiped the mascara furiously with a wet piece of toilet paper, thankful that she’d decided not to wear any more makeup. As she opened it again, she had to blink a few times, feeling uncomfortable.

“Oh,  _ really _ ?” 

The contact had moved from its place, and it was folded over itself, irritating her eye which was already turning red. She took the contact off quickly before it fell off, grabbed the contact’s kit from her purse, and unscrewed the case’s lid. She put the lens inside, filled it up with the cleaning solution, and then squirted some eye drops into her now dry and itchy eye. 

The front door opened, and Celaena almost jumped into the air. 

An old lady nodded at her with a polite smile and then headed to the cubicle closest to the front door. Celaena sighed loudly and placed the contact on the tip of her finger. That had been too close for comfort. She had gotten the hand of the contacts pretty fast, even if she still found them to be an annoyance; it was easy enough to take them off, and most of the time, she could get them in on the first attempt. That didn’t make it any more terrifying whenever she had to take them off in public. She’d had to do it at school once, and it’d been intense -even if she’d been in a bathroom no one ever used, only some freshmen. 

Celaena managed to push her bottom eyelid down with one finger, placing the one with the contact just in front of her eye. That was always the creepiest part, there was nothing natural about poking one’s own eye.

“Celaena?” Elide’s soft voice came from the half-opened front door.

Celaena side-glanced at her, not daring to turn her head around, frozen in place.

“Yes?” she asked innocently.

“Are you… okay?”

As Elide spoke, the old lady came out of the cubicle and went over to wash her hands, standing between Elide and Celaena. The former poked her head to one side to look around, and Celaena placed the contact in a quick motion, closing the case and shoving it inside her bag. She opened the tap to wash her hands as she kept looking down.

“I’m fine, just got distracted with my phone, did I take too long?” she brushed her blond hair behind her ear as she closed the tap and straightened up to look at Elide.

The short girl held the door open for the old lady, who thanked her for her kindness. Elide closed the door behind her and squared her shoulders while she looked dead into Celaena’s eyes.

“Most people at school think I’m stupid…” she started softly. “I know I look like a nerd, and I’m into fantasy books and ran a book club, which might all not seem cool enough for most people to pay me much attention.” She rubbed the tip of her black boot on the floor, and then looked back up. “But I’m also captain of the math club, debate club, and I’m part of the drama club.”

Not knowing what to do, Celaena stood to her full height, drawing her shoulders back. She was almost a head taller than Elide and built much stronger than the petite girl. Still, she was scared of her at that precise moment. Elide was blocking the door, and Celaena felt trapped, her heart trying to jump out of her chest again. 

“What are you talking about, Elide? I never said you were stupid.”

“No, you haven’t. And I hope you haven’t thought about it either, after all, we know each other pretty well, don’t we? Or at least, I thought we did.”

She could hear her heart pounding in her ears, and she wondered if it was loud enough for Elide to hear it too.

“Elide... I still have no idea what you’re talking about. I... barely just met you.” 

Celaena took a step back, almost on instinct. She hung her purse from a shoulder and then stepped back to the front, regretting her previous movement.

“I’m not stupid,” Elide repeated. “I’ve been tying loose ends... since the first time I saw you at school, there was something that seemed off. It took me a while to figure out what it was until I realized you seemed to be on-stage at all times. As I said, I’m part of the drama club and I get the main role in most plays.” Elide rubbed the tip of her boot on the floor again and Celaena could swear her heart stilled in her chest. She felt numb. “I know a fair bit about acting. And you, Celaena -if I might call you that- have been on a stage since the day you stepped into Adarlan Elite High.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you really enjoyed this twist in the story! Where you expecting it?? I didn't, haha. I think Elide is too smart for her own good, and it was about time someone figured out who Aelin was! Do you reckon she knows the truth, or only that Aelin is lying? :O Would love to hear your thoughts! <3


End file.
